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 Post subject: My son's starting college! YAY! WAAAH!
PostPosted: Wed Aug 20, 2014 12:31 pm 
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Flounceiad 2011
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I don't usually post in here because my kids are older, but my youngest is moving into college tomorrow and I am having ALL THE FEELINGS. He's going to the university where I did my MA, which is wonderful, full of great people and happy associations, and literally ten minutes from home. He's psyched, organized, mostly packed, showing admirable sangfroid about the whole business, and I'm sure he'll do very well. But man - I could really use some emotional Novocaine right now, because I just want to get in the bathtub and cry because my baby grew up so quickly. And the weirdest thing is that I honestly never anticipated feeling this way: I'm not a clingy parent, have always encouraged my kids' interests and adventures, and always have stuff of my own going on. Maybe it's because he's the youngest, maybe it's because I've been missing my mom a lot lately, maybe it's %$#@ hormones...probably some of each. Anyway, that's me today, just trying to keep my sh*t together.

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 Post subject: Re: My son's starting college! YAY! WAAAH!
PostPosted: Wed Aug 20, 2014 12:45 pm 
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Congratulations to him! I am years and years away from this myself, but a friend whose son started college yesterday said that her heart is breaking and soaring at the same time. I hope he has a wonderful experience.


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 Post subject: Re: My son's starting college! YAY! WAAAH!
PostPosted: Wed Aug 20, 2014 12:53 pm 
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Aww! Congrats to him and hugs to you! <3


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 Post subject: Re: My son's starting college! YAY! WAAAH!
PostPosted: Wed Aug 20, 2014 12:55 pm 
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Congrats to him! I can see how that could sorta sneak up on you as a parent. Such a happy thing, but a huge milestone too, in his life and in yours.

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 Post subject: Re: My son's starting college! YAY! WAAAH!
PostPosted: Wed Aug 20, 2014 1:06 pm 
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ahhhhh. empty nest!!!
at least he is close so he can bring you the gift of laundry every weekend :-)

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 Post subject: Re: My son's starting college! YAY! WAAAH!
PostPosted: Wed Aug 20, 2014 1:25 pm 
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Thanks - yes, it's a real combination of emotions. My middle son is home right now, so the nest won't be empty (we also have a dog and two cats), but it will definitely be a change. We moved into this house when my youngest was only three months old, so he's really never lived anywhere else. My oldest was always super independent (he went away to camp for most of each summer from the time he was 13, boarding school in HS, and has always traveled a lot), and my middle son went away to college, but this will really be James' first time away from home on his own. Of course, he seems perfectly chill about it, and he actually got a single, which is great (I had a triple my first semester, with two girls who could not have been more dissimilar to me); it's me who's having issues!

I was saying earlier that I actually think stuff may be getting scoured up that I didn't really deal with when Evan (#2 son) started school four years ago: my mom had just died, I was looking down the barrel of settling her estate and cleaning out her apartment, my dirtbag brother blew his sobriety spectacularly, and I was right in the middle of finishing my MA thesis, so I was just numb. I couldn't really access anything but grim determination, and not holding it together wasn't an option. So now it's like all that is bubbling up to the surface, and I can't seem to push it back down. I just need to get through then next couple of days and help make this as uncomplicated as possible for James, and then I can meltdown on the weekend if necessary!

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 Post subject: Re: My son's starting college! YAY! WAAAH!
PostPosted: Wed Aug 20, 2014 2:45 pm 
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i think it's a really hard transition for parents and it sounds like you have a whole bunch of emotional "stuff" all culminating with the third kid. the first one sounds like you didnt go through the "my baby is going to college" emotions since he was already so independent to begin wtih and then with the second you had so much other stuff going on. you are going through three kids worth of emotions all at once!!

i am the youngest and i went to a Catholic college and when i was graduating there was a ceremony before graduation called baccalaureate that as far as i could tell/remember was just some religious ceremony similar to a hooding ceremony but had some religious bent to it. i dont really remember. i was baptized catholic but not raised particularly religiously so this particular ceremony meant literally nothing to me.i was only going because literally everyone was going and my parents were coming. so the week prior to graduation was "senior week" with all sorts of various activities culminating in the night before baccalaureate with senior bar night.

well ive never been a big drinker ever and have always been the well behaved child but i went out that night and got completely over the top black out drunk and spent the night (errr morning) puking my guts out in the bathroom in the dorm. so bad that i burst all the capillaries in my eyelids. i was SOOOO hung over the next day and i actually tried to call my parents to tell them not to come but this was the days before everyone had a cell phone and they had already left.

my mom was SOOOOOOO upset. there were much tears and i COULD NOT figure out what the heck her problem was. i was FULLY legal to be drinking. i was 22 when i graduated. i had gone out with friends, there was a van from the school so no one was driving. it was not actual graduation that was in a day or 2 after.
my dad had to like go and get her and like calm her down.
i think it was just the whole baby girl graduating college thing and i think she wanted a "nice day" with her daughter she was so proud of before i graduated and went off into the REAL WORLD and moved in with A BOY (the boy who happens to know be my husband and baby daddy)

so yeah it's hard. i think you are fully entitled to have a good weepy sesh after he's moved out. perhaps some celebratory falafel with TAHINI sauce

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 Post subject: Re: My son's starting college! YAY! WAAAH!
PostPosted: Wed Aug 20, 2014 3:45 pm 
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Congratulations!

I have a ways to go before Shorty is out of the house (if indeed she ever leaves) but I have noticed that I have a much worse time with the milestones with her than I did with the older two.

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 Post subject: Re: My son's starting college! YAY! WAAAH!
PostPosted: Wed Aug 20, 2014 4:58 pm 
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LisaPunk wrote:
i think it's a really hard transition for parents and it sounds like you have a whole bunch of emotional "stuff" all culminating with the third kid. the first one sounds like you didnt go through the "my baby is going to college" emotions since he was already so independent to begin wtih and then with the second you had so much other stuff going on. you are going through three kids worth of emotions all at once!!
Yes, that's what it feels like. He's such a great kid, and even though he's not going very far at all, I am going to miss having him around all the time. But I'm sure everything will go smoothly, and I'll be okay; god knows I have enough stuff on my own plate to be getting busy with (my own classes start a week from Tuesday, so I have a syllabus and lesson plans to tinker with before I meet this year's crop of freshmen. Given the circumstances, maybe I'll even be extra nice to them!).
LisaPunk wrote:
i think you are fully entitled to have a good weepy sesh after he's moved out. perhaps some celebratory falafel with TAHINI sauce
For realz.

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Nothing is safe from weiners in my neighborhood... ~ crowderpea
I didn't embarrass him by saying anything about wanking ~ 8ball
"SMLOUNCE!" ~ smurfterrobang?!
http://elizaveganpage.blogspot.com


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