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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Wed Dec 14, 2011 4:19 pm 
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Sorry RC. Is there another doctor you can see? One who is maybe willing to work with you more? I personally don't think it'd be unethical to tell a new doctor that you'd been trying for a year before your loss-- and if they questioned that based on your records, act confused and be like "they must have written that down wrong, we were trying before that."

Even without fudging the numbers, I feel like most doctors would be willing to do tests (if you're willing to pay for them/have insurance that will pay for them) to reassure someone who has been through a loss or is concerned about not being able to successfully conceive a healthy pregnancy for whatever reason. There are plenty of reasons a person might not want to wait another 9 cycles.

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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Wed Dec 14, 2011 4:32 pm 
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RC and FB, are you and your friends going to a Reproductive Endocrinologist? I was 38 and going to my OB who glossed over the fact that I was not menstruating for 4 months at a clip, and told me just to keep trying, because 'at your age it takes longer.' It took an RE to run all the tests we needed to find out what was the matter.

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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Wed Dec 14, 2011 5:01 pm 
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Tofulish wrote:
RC and FB, are you and your friends going to a Reproductive Endocrinologist? I was 38 and going to my OB who glossed over the fact that I was not menstruating for 4 months at a clip, and told me just to keep trying, because 'at your age it takes longer.' It took an RE to run all the tests we needed to find out what was the matter.


This is what I've gotten from the doctor "Well you got pregnant before so obviously you don't have problems conceiving." I don't know that there is anything wrong; my cycle is textbook perfect. Ovulation at day 14, period at day 28. I just want someone to do something, run tests, do an exam, anything, to reassure me that everything is ok, but I have to fail at this for 6 - 12 months before they will entertain the idea. I realize odds are that everything is fine and I can't expect things to happen instantly, but jeez, just humor me, I have good insurance! (for now)

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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Wed Dec 14, 2011 8:59 pm 
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RC what you are feeling is perfectly normal after an unexplained miscarriage. The truth is that a whole lot of pregnancies end in miscarriages and most of the time there is no way to look at why it happened. That is one of the most terrifying things ever especially if you have your heart set on TTC during a certain time period. I have been there and really feel for you.

I do agree though, if you are willing to pay for testing and have the insurance for it, a doctor should do it.


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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Wed Dec 14, 2011 9:12 pm 
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rabidchild wrote:
Tofulish wrote:
RC and FB, are you and your friends going to a Reproductive Endocrinologist? I was 38 and going to my OB who glossed over the fact that I was not menstruating for 4 months at a clip, and told me just to keep trying, because 'at your age it takes longer.' It took an RE to run all the tests we needed to find out what was the matter.


This is what I've gotten from the doctor "Well you got pregnant before so obviously you don't have problems conceiving." I don't know that there is anything wrong; my cycle is textbook perfect. Ovulation at day 14, period at day 28. I just want someone to do something, run tests, do an exam, anything, to reassure me that everything is ok, but I have to fail at this for 6 - 12 months before they will entertain the idea. I realize odds are that everything is fine and I can't expect things to happen instantly, but jeez, just humor me, I have good insurance! (for now)


My point was just that if you have concerns, don't go to your regular OB/Gyn, go to an RE (both are medical doctors), if you can, because their practice is based on figuring out infertility issues, and they may be able to spot something your OB might miss.

Sending you happy conception vibes!

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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Thu Dec 15, 2011 8:07 am 
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Tofulish wrote:
My point was just that if you have concerns, don't go to your regular OB/Gyn, go to an RE (both are medical doctors), if you can, because their practice is based on figuring out infertility issues, and they may be able to spot something your OB might miss.

Sending you happy conception vibes!


Gotcha! I may look into it.

Now this morning, the spotting of yesterday is completely gone, and my temperature is still up (it didn't drop yesterday when I was spotting). I took test #3, which may or may not have the faintest second line in all of existence... but compared to yesterday's decidedly negative pee stick, there is definitely a faint something there. I just wish my body would decide what it's doing so I can deal with it.

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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Thu Dec 15, 2011 12:04 pm 
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annak, how long is your other half deployed for? Are you able to try right before/after he leaves, or is he away for like a year?

rc, try your best not to stress about possible troubles (I know it's hard). Early miscarriages are very, very common, so there's a good chance that your experience was just a one off thing, awful though it was. You're being really careful with tracking temps, etc. so it might be worth revisiting the doc after 6 months and see if they might consider some testing then. Can I ask why the switch of insurances? That sounds brutal.

flava, that sucks about your friend. What is the matter with her doctor? One miscarriage can be deemed an unfortunate event, but three miscarriages? You don't need a medical degree to know that something's probably up there.

I went for ages to various gynos and none of them diagnosed PCO until we moved here It drives me mad now to think of the years (literally, 16 years!) of sick days, flooding, anemia, blood transfusions, etc. that should've been remedied had one of the docs dug a little deeper.


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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Thu Dec 15, 2011 12:19 pm 
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refinnej wrote:
I went for ages to various gynos and none of them diagnosed PCO until we moved here It drives me mad now to think of the years (literally, 16 years!) of sick days, flooding, anemia, blood transfusions, etc. that should've been remedied had one of the docs dug a little deeper.


That is why I think it is so important to go to an RE. I still get angry at how many signs my OB missed, all while telling me 'oh at your age it just takes longer.' And flava's friend is being told 'oh you're young its no big deal." So an RE who is actually trained to run all the tests can make a huge difference. I wouldn't have gotten pregnant or had my baby if I'd listened just to my OB. I'd still be wondering why I was supposedly normal but missing my period for months at a time.

Another example of the differences is that when I had my blighted ovum, my RE did a ton of tests to figure out why it didn't implant, so next time I got pregnant I was supplementing with progesterone to maintain the pregnancy that turned out to become Leela.

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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Thu Dec 15, 2011 12:22 pm 
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refinnej wrote:
Can I ask why the switch of insurances? That sounds brutal.


Because the grant I'm on is only through 9/30/12, so my job ends then. Right now we have an HMO through my job. Once my job ends, we have to switch back to Brett's insurance, which is a high-deductable plan... which I'm pretty sure is evil and should be illegal. We could continue with mine on COBRA but it would be so expensive that we'd do better putting that money into an account and hedging our bets on just not ever getting sick or hurt or anything (preventive medicine is covered 100%; pregnancy is not considered preventive medicine).

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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Thu Dec 15, 2011 12:25 pm 
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Our COBRA for me and Leela is $900 a month. I can't find anything lower. Its insane. And we don't meet the levels for S-chip for her.

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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Thu Dec 15, 2011 12:58 pm 
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Tofulish wrote:
Our COBRA for me and Leela is $900 a month. I can't find anything lower. Its insane. And we don't meet the levels for S-chip for her.


Any way to send the bills to people who are opposed to socialized medicine? Health insurance in this country is extremely high up on my 'list of things that make me angry.' Fortunately, if we get this baby thing together, it'll be $9/mo for state baby insurance if i am not working at all, and tops, $19 if I am. Of course Brett and my insurance would still be that high deductable monster, but at least I wouldn't have to worry about pediatrician stuff.

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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Sat Dec 17, 2011 5:13 pm 
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being facetious here: I think getting the bill for other's healthcare is exactly what those opposed to socialized medicine want to prevent

in seriousness though, it is so frustrating when you have to make decisions based on what your health care covers instead of what you want and think is best for your health.


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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Sat Dec 17, 2011 7:05 pm 
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chiveggie wrote:
being facetious here: I think getting the bill for other's healthcare is exactly what those opposed to socialized medicine want to prevent



From what I have observed of most of them, though, they do not necessarily want to prevent other people from getting THEIR bills.. (yes, this is totally off topic and I have no desire to start a political argument. But I was struck yet again last week when some very republican/fox news party line boomer types were talking about how they'd be free to retire just as soon as Medicare kicked in...an hour later they were complaining that we were leaving entire hospitals in iraq with MRI machines and everything and the people weren't even grateful! *headdesk* )


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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2011 2:42 pm 
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annak wrote:
chiveggie wrote:
being facetious here: I think getting the bill for other's healthcare is exactly what those opposed to socialized medicine want to prevent



From what I have observed of most of them, though, they do not necessarily want to prevent other people from getting THEIR bills.. (yes, this is totally off topic and I have no desire to start a political argument. But I was struck yet again last week when some very republican/fox news party line boomer types were talking about how they'd be free to retire just as soon as Medicare kicked in...an hour later they were complaining that we were leaving entire hospitals in iraq with MRI machines and everything and the people weren't even grateful! *headdesk* )


:) My dad's very republican friend is also complaining about his bad knee, but is waiting for his knee replacement for another year once he's on medicare. Everyone likes the system when it benefits them, not so much when it doesn't (obviously and directly) benefit them


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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2011 3:26 pm 
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I just had my IUD removed. :)


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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2011 7:05 pm 
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flavabean wrote:
I just had my IUD removed. :)


Woohoo!! Good luck and have fun!

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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2011 8:08 pm 
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Congratulations Flava! Sending you tons of good thoughts <3

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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2011 8:36 pm 
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yea flavabean :)


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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2011 8:38 pm 
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Wow, flava! What is your plan? Are you trying right away or going to give it a few months? Have fun either way!


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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 4:47 am 
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Read mm's "What is your plan?" and thought in a giggling way: "I've heard that having sex helps". Please don't judge my sleep deprived self too harshly. :)

Congrats flava!


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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 9:03 am 
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Don't worry, it is very giggle-inducing. I can send you my notes, mitten!

We're not planning anything in particular. I was starting to have some issues with the IUD, and I've been charting for almost a year now just for fun (yes, I have a very odd sense of what is fun), and I thought it'd be good to just get rid of it. I'd rather not get pregnant RIGHTNOW - we've said that we'd really like Ezra to be a bit older so he understands what's going on. But if it happens, we'll be perfectly happy. Both Nate and I are in a good place right now, which is just so different than what it's been like in the recent past. We'll see what happens! (which is exactly what we said when we were planning for Ezra, and that took almost a year for that pregnancy to happen, so don't be holding your breath!)


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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Sun Dec 25, 2011 6:40 am 
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I got my period for the first time in over 2 years. Finally, we can start trying for another baby again (we were trying before, but with no periods, it's hard to tell if you are getting anywhere). I thought I was just spotting because all yesterday, I only leaked a few drops, but this morning things got a lot heavier.

I've never been so excited to have a period. I was starting to worry my uterus must be broke or that I would have to wean both my kids completely before I got the flow back again.

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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Sun Dec 25, 2011 9:15 am 
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Woot! Here's hoping that you'll soon join the ranks of the sleep deprived!


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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Mon Dec 26, 2011 5:08 am 
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refinnej wrote:
Woot! Here's hoping that you'll soon join the ranks of the sleep deprived!

I'm still sleep deprived! I nursed Raygold 4 times in the less than 8 hours we were 'sleeping' last night. He sleeps worse than his cousin, who is over a year younger than him (and sleeps worse than she did when she was a newborn, too)! (And yet I still want another baby.)

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 Post subject: Re: conceivin' thread
PostPosted: Mon Dec 26, 2011 7:14 pm 
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Still lurking here! Period is 7 days late if i go by my presumed peak day and temp shift and period trends, but I stopped charting after my temp shift (about 16 days ago). Trying not to think about it, but I might test on the 30th if my AF hasn't made an appearance.

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