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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Wed Apr 17, 2013 9:23 pm 
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FCAT testing this week. Thanks for all that uncontrolled stress, Florida.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Thu Apr 18, 2013 10:12 am 
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Kelly wrote:
FCAT testing this week. Thanks for all that uncontrolled stress, Florida.

Toby was so excited about the math FCAT. He is so weird. . .

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Thu Apr 18, 2013 5:44 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Thu Apr 18, 2013 5:45 pm 
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Vantine wrote:
Kelly wrote:
FCAT testing this week. Thanks for all that uncontrolled stress, Florida.

Toby was so excited about the math FCAT. He is so weird. . .


That is awesome.


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Thu Apr 18, 2013 6:43 pm 
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Vantine wrote:
Kelly wrote:
FCAT testing this week. Thanks for all that uncontrolled stress, Florida.

Toby was so excited about the math FCAT. He is so weird. . .


Awe Toby <3

Shae had little worrying freak outs each night and then came home saying how easy they were. The whole being quiet all day thing nearly killed him though. He must have repeated the play by play of how long they had to be quiet each day 10 times. So glad that's over with!

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Thu Apr 18, 2013 7:52 pm 
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Yeah, the quiet time is pretty unreasonable. The new version of the state test is taking kids THREE HOURS. *I* have trouble sitting still and silent for three freaking hours, and yet I am supposed to expect my 17-18 year old kids to not only do that, but to do well on this test. I have no idea how that's going to fly with the 9th graders, especially after lunch.

During the three hour window, we also are only supposed to allow them to leave for bathroom etc "in an emergency." Normally I ignore rules like that, but with the state test, we are under strict rules ourselves, so I can't just consider a kid needing to go an "emergency."

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 5:39 pm 
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lavawitch wrote:
Yeah, the quiet time is pretty unreasonable. The new version of the state test is taking kids THREE HOURS. *I* have trouble sitting still and silent for three freaking hours, and yet I am supposed to expect my 17-18 year old kids to not only do that, but to do well on this test. I have no idea how that's going to fly with the 9th graders, especially after lunch.

During the three hour window, we also are only supposed to allow them to leave for bathroom etc "in an emergency." Normally I ignore rules like that, but with the state test, we are under strict rules ourselves, so I can't just consider a kid needing to go an "emergency."


I'm almost afraid to ask...how does one determine whether a student's need to go to the bathroom constitutes an emergency??

I mean...I can't even imagine. Where I went to school, it was not allowed for a teacher to refuse to allow a student to go to the bathroom. Occasionally students would abuse that, but it was simply not allowed for a teacher to force a child to "hold it in". If they thought a child might be taking advantage they could refer them for disciplinary action in some other way, but it was never allowed for a teacher to just not let a student go to the bathroom. It would be considered child abuse.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 5:45 pm 
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lavawitch wrote:
Yeah, the quiet time is pretty unreasonable. The new version of the state test is taking kids THREE HOURS. *I* have trouble sitting still and silent for three freaking hours, and yet I am supposed to expect my 17-18 year old kids to not only do that, but to do well on this test. I have no idea how that's going to fly with the 9th graders, especially after lunch.

During the three hour window, we also are only supposed to allow them to leave for bathroom etc "in an emergency." Normally I ignore rules like that, but with the state test, we are under strict rules ourselves, so I can't just consider a kid needing to go an "emergency."


Oh my god, that is insane. I wonder how many high schoolers will be bleeding through their jeans during standardized testing!

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 5:50 pm 
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You ask them to wait a couple minutes. If they ask again, they need to go. If they forget about it and don't, you don't worry. I do use this technique during notes or something I don't want them to miss. They usually tell me they can wait a few once thy know we'll be done soon, or they just say they need to go now, in which case they go.

But I never deny or ask other than that. My classroom has one bathroom pass. If the pass is available, kid writes name on board and goes. If it is not there, they suck it up and wait. These are young adults; they can wait a few minutes. *I* can't go to the bathroom during the day, nor can most teachers. In my first school, I was written up for letting kids go. I was told they need to just go at lunch. Which is ridiculous. They don't have time then since the lines are long and they need to, you know, EAT.

However, when admin is informing you that you are not allowed to let kids out for any reason because of state testing guidelines, you follow orders.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 7:24 pm 
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i hated that about teaching. i had students who regularly "saved it" so they could go in my class because I was the only teacher who would let them go. We had a huge campus and 5 minutes between class. I also was careful that unless the student was diligent and/or self starter, that they wait until it wasn't critical, and i think they respected me a lot more because i treated them like people.

FC has her standardized testing tomorrow. she's less of a wreck this time, thank goodness.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 7:53 pm 
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lavawitch wrote:
Yeah, the quiet time is pretty unreasonable. The new version of the state test is taking kids THREE HOURS. *I* have trouble sitting still and silent for three freaking hours, and yet I am supposed to expect my 17-18 year old kids to not only do that, but to do well on this test. I have no idea how that's going to fly with the 9th graders, especially after lunch.

During the three hour window, we also are only supposed to allow them to leave for bathroom etc "in an emergency." Normally I ignore rules like that, but with the state test, we are under strict rules ourselves, so I can't just consider a kid needing to go an "emergency."


That's insane. Here we have kids escorted during tests--which doesn't eliminate cheating, you could still bring your phone into stall and text answers you remember, but it makes it harder. But they can go to the damn bathroom.


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 9:06 pm 
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One of the things that made my second high school (a public boarding school) so, so, SO much better than my original one (plain jane suburban public school, probably better than 90% of public schools out there) is that they didn't do any of this hall pass, lock the students in the classroom horse shiitake. We had multiple free periods, they weren't expected to be spent in study halls or whatever, no one thought it was a scandal if we had to pee, we were trusted and expected to do the work and it just..well, maybe people did cut class? but I don't remember it, and I didn't. If we had a free period we'd either hang out in a public area in the school building or go back to the dorms, or hang out on campus somewhere (or even sign out and go to the grocery store across the street).

Anyway, I just think treating high school students like toddlers is silly. What is it they think is going to happen if someone goes to the bathroom?


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 9:34 pm 
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annak wrote:
What is it they think is going to happen if someone goes to the bathroom?


You must have been a good kid! haha.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 9:54 pm 
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Haha! I teach second grade and I have to monitor the bathroom stuff.

When the school is testing, the hallways have to be silent. If you let them go to their own devices, kids run to the bathroom, try to climb the stalls, wet paper towels and throw them, etc, etc, its basically a nightmare.

I certainly let them go if they need to, but like LW said, you can tell if they can wait or not.


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 11:19 pm 
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In *second grade*? Are they feral? Man, I think I may have just always been a 70 year old lady trapped in a younger body.


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Sat Apr 20, 2013 2:56 am 
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Friday wrote:
lavawitch wrote:
Yeah, the quiet time is pretty unreasonable. The new version of the state test is taking kids THREE HOURS. *I* have trouble sitting still and silent for three freaking hours, and yet I am supposed to expect my 17-18 year old kids to not only do that, but to do well on this test. I have no idea how that's going to fly with the 9th graders, especially after lunch.

During the three hour window, we also are only supposed to allow them to leave for bathroom etc "in an emergency." Normally I ignore rules like that, but with the state test, we are under strict rules ourselves, so I can't just consider a kid needing to go an "emergency."


That's insane. Here we have kids escorted during tests--which doesn't eliminate cheating, you could still bring your phone into stall and text answers you remember, but it makes it harder. But they can go to the damn bathroom.


That's what we do, which means calling someone, and there aren't enough someones and it takes them a while to come.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Sat Apr 20, 2013 2:57 am 
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Kelly wrote:
annak wrote:
What is it they think is going to happen if someone goes to the bathroom?


You must have been a good kid! haha.


Yeah. Someone set a fire in the hall bathroom a couple weeks ago. An actual fire. Where I teach GED, they had kids going to the bathrooms to drink and a kid (9th grader) passed out and hit her head.

I like my take the pass and just go system, but I've had to ban about 10% of my kids from leaving at all because they just don't come back, so I have to report to security. I don't like being the bathroom police. I've also been super strict on honestly about where they go: take the bathroom pass and come back 10 minutes later with vending machine food, and you are in trouble. Tell me you need a snack and if you've been doing your work etc, I'll let you go to the machines. Just tell me where you are going! Most are good about that now.

At least we aren't as bad as Pearson testing centers. They wouldn't let me use my little back pillow without prearranged formal disability accommodations.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Tue Apr 23, 2013 2:45 pm 
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My middle one got suspended. On a field trip. I am beyond furious.

We have been talking about her behavior for several weeks.

I hope she enjoys lock-down.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Wed Apr 24, 2013 6:43 am 
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jeez.

the kid had a chance to get a math grade to pull her out of the hole. she got a: 50.
so far her grades are 40, 50, and she's taking another today.

our trip up north is conditional on her passing math [otherwise she has to do a catch-up week at the end of the semester in June]. which means i haven't bought the tickets, because if we don't have that extra week, it's not worth going to the US in peak season for only 10 days before the new semester starts in mid July [if she's failing, keeping her out of school for extra weeks also goes out of the question].
my mother is going to kill me if we don't go up there. ugh.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Wed Apr 24, 2013 7:25 am 
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I am so sorry torque, that sounds really horrible.

Are you concerned about flight prices rising? Or do you feel like you have the time to wait? If you get a great fare, I'd just buy your own ticket, and get hers later, even if prices go up, you've only paid the difference once.

We are looking forward to seeing you guys! Maybe we can do an NYC playdate again. I hope things get better for FC and that she passes math with flying colors.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Thu Apr 25, 2013 6:40 am 
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i'm thinking of going up again at christmas [which i hate, it's depression central up there, bad weather, etc]. and in the meantime keeping a look out for cheap fares for myself. i passed up a $400 fare in March because i was only thinking about traveling with the kid. i need the vacay myself, somehow.
[they are so expensive at peak time that it really doesn't matter when i buy. it's exorbitant no matter how you slice it.]

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Thu Apr 25, 2013 2:16 pm 
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So the 19 year old went to the dentist, had two teeth pulled and is in pain. He is literally throwing a temper tantrum because of the pain. But when I offered to help he yelled at me.
Yeah. I am pretty over my kids right now.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Thu Apr 25, 2013 2:26 pm 
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torque wrote:
What do you think, people?

Am I a terrible person for not letting my kid go to a facebook meetup picnic of anime people, on the patio of an art museum [without museum permission, so you know they'll get kicked off]? She is 13. She doesn't know any of these people IRL. She supposedly has a friend going with her but so far the friend's parents have not called me to talk about it. She says I am "too obsessed with security" and that i don't trust her although obviously I don't trust the creepy adults that always seem to be lurking in the wings of these things [nothing wrong with anime, or cosplay, but there is always a large contingent, at least here, of adult men trying to pick up girls or pretending-to-be-girls]. I think she's an entitled little whiner. I also don't have time for this crepe today.


I know I am late on this but I completely agree with your decision. And I don't think it's just an age thing, but an experience thing too. That gut feeling that tells you whether a stranger is sketchy and how to get away from them is informed by hundreds of data points ; your kid surely needs to meet many more new people through more controlled ways like classes, clubs and camps before her gut feeling can graduate and move on to things like internet meetups, conventions and youth hostels.

I was thinking of your post because just last week I met 2 Korean girls traveling through Eastern Europe who, in my opinion, had horrifically poor judgement in which stranger they trusted and what information they put out there, even though they were college aged.


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Sun Apr 28, 2013 5:19 pm 
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i was feeling all self-satisfied with my daughter sharing some personal stuff with me this morning.

which is karma's way of telling me that today i would find out that the kid hasn't done her math homework all semester. as she's been swearing to me that the failing grades in math won't be so bad because of her homework and class participation. jeebus. Mr T is threatening to take her out of school tomorrow. Of course, this week I am working 14 hour days every day for a special event. OF COURSE.
I just took away all of her cosplay stuff. I am such a forking terrible person. She's in there ripping apart her school books and throwing things at the wall. I can't wait to see a) if i will be able to meet with the school people and b) if i will live through the next few hours. i think i can hear her sharpening stakes to stick through my heart. too bad i don't have one for her to find.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's complain about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Sun Apr 28, 2013 8:22 pm 
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update: we all survived.
i feel so bad for her. she is stuck in math on the same thing i was stuck in math on when i was her age. she didn't ask for help because she was ashamed. it breaks my heart.
[ps i still don't understand the forking math. thank goodness for khan academy. i don't understand how i was able to pass that year of math and somehow eventually get up to calculus.]

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