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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 7:01 am 
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Seagull of the PPK
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after i typed that yesterday we had a raging fit of anger where everything got thrown across her room (luckily, already a pit so you can't even tell), a crying fit about how she hates everything and is miserable, and her coming into my office and hugging me to tell me how much she loves me. I can barely comprehend the mood mileage here.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 9:52 am 
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I think teens just save up the hormonal fits for bigger explosions.

But I KNOW teen make the worst decisions and they do it frequently. So there is that to look forward to. Teens are just a new kind of parenting situation from tweens.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 1:54 pm 
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Seagull of the PPK
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oooooh my god! she's almost done with her class (i am working here in my office) and she is doing soooooooo well!
(she had a meltdown earlier today saying she didn't know what to do, and so i gave her the quick primer, and some books, and only hopped in there a few times to intervene when I thought she could benefit. Other than that I am sitting here smiling like a cheshire cat.)

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 2:05 pm 
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Semen Strong
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Yay! So glad it is going well!

I think we need a picture of your grin :D

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 5:02 pm 
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Middle school - where children learn that classes have content & that stuff is hard sometimes. TobyT is doing 9th grade work right now and after coasting for so long is shocked to find out that Chinese is hard! Algebra is hard! Literary analysis is hard!

Life, my son, is sometimes hard. . . Better he learns this now instead of sobbing to a college professor that "I was an honor student in high school! Why am I failing?"

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 5:44 pm 
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Chompy has difficulty sticking with anything that's too challenging. This is a smart kid. He can—could—do anything. But half the time he doesn't even want to try. To explore.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 6:01 pm 
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That describes pretty much all of my brightest students. They spend endless amounts of time calculating the least amount of work required in order to get an A- or a C+ or whatever grade they think is acceptable.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 7:42 pm 
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Oh my god, yes. To all of that. It was such an awakening for Shae that work could be difficult and his solution to that was to just ignore it. And then ignore all work. Then go crazy making it all up at the last minute. Over and over! He just survived his first round of high school exams and while they weren't all as good as we wish they were, he did make the highest grade in his classes on both his Biology and his English exams. These past few weeks, he seems renewed and the most focused I've seen him. Really hoping this is the new normal.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 6:11 pm 
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My kid's finally having academic success and has found her passion, studying animal science at an ag/tech school. So proud as a mom and ambivalent as a vegan. It's the best program for her if she pursues being a vet, and she loves it, but ag/tech. Ick. She's so excited she has an internship "working with goats, sheep, and cows," and I'm happy for her excitement, but it also makes me cringe a little thinking about the bigger picture behind internships like that.

She already romanticizes the whole pastoral life. From the first time I took her upstate. And I've been part of it with charming stories of the dairy farm across the road and my 4H goats growing up, though I've also talked a lot about my reasons for being vegan.

She has such a bright line in her mind between companion animals and food animals, and nothing in this program discourages that--everything is there to reenforce it. Classes to prepare you to be go to vet school to take care of puppies, and classes to prepare you to work for Purdue.

Even so, there seem to be a lot of pro-animal people around.

It's kind of awesome that I'm starting to feel confident enough of her success to worry that she'll use it for good.


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 7:04 pm 
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Semen Strong
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Oh Friday, that is such good news! I am so happy that FS is doing well - and just based on what you've shared about her here, she seems to have such a strong sense for justice, that I am sure that whatever she ends up doing, that is going to find its expression in her life somehow, you know?

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 9:51 pm 
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Tofulish, I just wanted to say that I think it is lovely how you remember all these little details about people's lives and celebrate their loved ones' wins, big and small.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Thu Jan 30, 2014 5:47 pm 
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I am having a day where I am really disappointed in my oldest. I can't really define why. Just a series of him only actions that are exhausting me.

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Don't mind my breasts and vagina, I'm a gay man.---Idatetatooedguys.

"Tots: the universal food band-aid... better than a mother's kiss. Healin' wounds since 1954." Meggs


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Jan 31, 2014 6:21 am 
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Seagull of the PPK
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I was headed there yesterday. The day just began and it already looked like a shiitake parade, so I told her to get changed, we were going to the park dammit, and we drove to a rather far-off shady park and spent the day acting like adults instead of yelling at each other. Thank god this week is slow and I can do stuff like this. Can't wait for school to start again (Feb 10).

We are still having screentime issues (phone/laptop/TV). I decided she could be on the same schedule as me- an hour to check her email/tumbler/FB in the morning and then an hour after "work" at night when everyone else watches TV after dinner and cleanup.

On the one hand, it's summer, so I feel like a meanie and I shouldn't care that she's spending 18+ hours looking at her phone. On the other hand, I'm afraid that she won't be able to stop when school starts. Oh and also, all the things she talked about doing this summer- learning to use her new airbrush, learning to sew, cooking and Japanese lessons- fell to the wayside. She's not doing ANY of it.

So, tl;dr: I'm evil.

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I'm just a drunk who likes fruit. -- Desdemona


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Jan 31, 2014 3:58 pm 
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Nooch of Earl
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Are there any opportunities to get her into a class for those things (sewing, airbrushing, cooking, Japanese)? I find that with that kind of stuff, I'm much better at sticking to resolutions and goals with some external pressure applied.


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Fri Jan 31, 2014 5:01 pm 
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We So Excited
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j-dub wrote:
Tofulish, I just wanted to say that I think it is lovely how you remember all these little details about people's lives and celebrate their loved ones' wins, big and small.


+1 yummy.

<3 <3 <3


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Mon Feb 03, 2014 8:15 am 
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Seagull of the PPK
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annak wrote:
Are there any opportunities to get her into a class for those things (sewing, airbrushing, cooking, Japanese)? I find that with that kind of stuff, I'm much better at sticking to resolutions and goals with some external pressure applied.

when school starts, we'll see about her doing sewing classes. other than that, we talked about them because I can teach them.

good thing though- she lost her phone. other good thing, she got to go to a meetup and meet real people. now let's see if we can survive til school starts next week.

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Buddha says 'Meh'.--matwinser
I'm just a drunk who likes fruit. -- Desdemona


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:11 pm 
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Bathes in Braggs
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I haven't been around here much lately - my 14-y.o. has been sick since last summer and finally a month ago was diagnosed with Crohn's disease. Poor guy has been suffering. Last week he reacted to one of the medications he was on (azathioprine) and ended up in the ER. Now they are going to try nutrition therapy for twelve weeks, gradually bringing some meds back in. Nothing by mouth but a "peptide based formula" and, in two weeks when he can get an appointment in the GI clinic, a feeding tube at night.

He has the most wonderful attitude, though - he is such a great kid. I know this is going to be tough for him but he is facing it well so far. I don't think he realizes how hard it is going to be. On the other hand, the doctor has said that most people feel really good when they go on the formula and he has missed lots of soccer lately and plays badminton at school, so he is looking forward to getting back to full strength.


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:54 pm 
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Oh man, Arisaig, I'm really sorry to hear that. My aunt has Crohn's which is well controlled now but has been awful in the past. A couple things she swears by are psillium fiber and a book called Restoring Your Digestive Health (super not vegan-friendly though, just fyi). I really hope he's feeling better soon!

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"I'd rather have dried catshit! I'd rather have astroturf! I'd rather have an igloo!"~Isa

"But really, anyone willing to dangle their baby in front of a crocodile is A-OK in my book."~SSD


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Tue Feb 04, 2014 5:36 am 
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Seagull of the PPK
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Arisaig, sorry to hear about your son. He sounds like a champ though and I hope it all works out sooner rather than later. <3

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Buddha says 'Meh'.--matwinser
I'm just a drunk who likes fruit. -- Desdemona


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Tue Feb 04, 2014 10:58 am 
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Bathes in Braggs
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Thanks guys. One day down and he's not too impressed but sticking with it. He says the best way to get them down is to chug them and follow with a piece of candy or gum.


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Tue Feb 04, 2014 11:25 am 
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Bathes in Braggs
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Yay, the hospital just called to tell me 15 more cases of the formula are being delivered to my house at no charge. I think it is being covered by the company (Nestle - blech, but a necessary evil) because of the research the hospital does. I had planned to spend some time this week talking to our two insurance providers to find out how much of the $12,000+ cost they would cover. What a relief.

I determinedly and luckily never had to give my kids infant formula and now am feeding my teenager formula. It's better than the alternatives but still strange.


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Tue Feb 04, 2014 3:33 pm 
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Arisaig, that sounds really hard. I am so sorry your son is going through so much. I hope the formula works and that they find a solution for him soon, so he can go back to being a happy teenager.

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My oven is bigger on the inside, and it produces lots of wibbly wobbly, cake wakey... stuff. - The PoopieB.


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Tue Feb 04, 2014 4:23 pm 
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Nooch of Earl
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Oh my gosh I'm sorry to hear that, Arisaig, I hope your son is feeling better soon and able to manage it well. That sounds like such a tough thing to deal with - good luck!


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Wed Feb 05, 2014 2:23 am 
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I'm sure his good attitude is making and will continue to make a big difference.

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 Post subject: Re: Hey, let's chat about our teens/tweens!
PostPosted: Wed Feb 05, 2014 8:09 am 
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Seagull of the PPK
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counting down the hours til school starts Monday.
(she found her phone, sadly, and i had to pry it from her hands to get her to take a shower.)

(also, her part time teaching job just ended, although she was doing a great job, because the student wouldn't appear for class and was disrespecting her and I put an end to it. i feel bad because I know she really wanted the money, and now she won't even get paid for the few classes she had.)

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I'm just a drunk who likes fruit. -- Desdemona


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