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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Mon Oct 14, 2013 8:15 am 
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Oh my goodness refinnej! I can't even imagine. I really hope this week is much better and you get to enjoy your visit!


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Tue Oct 15, 2013 11:03 pm 
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I was just offered a bunch of money to go back to work on a project for 2 months. I really miss having money and part of me wants to go - its just 50 hours a week for 8 weeks and I could afford to live for another year on the money.

But I really hate leaving L and I think it would be such a huge shift for her from being with me all the time to being in a care situation for the bulk of the day.

How do people transition their slightly older kids into a care situation? What kind of care could you get for 2 months anyway? Any thoughts?

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Tue Oct 15, 2013 11:46 pm 
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As far as care goes, you'd probably have more luck finding a nanny for two months than anything else... getting a kid into a preschool on any kinda short notice seems to be pretty much undoable, at least here.

E was about Leela's age when he first went to daycare. He went from being with me all the time to being in care 5 days a week. Like we had literally never been away from each other for more than 2 or 3 hours at a stretch EVER at that point.

At first he had babysitters for 6 hours a day (I think), then after about two months he moved into a more ordinary daycare arrangement. He did ask about me/had some curiosity as to why I wasn't there, but never seemed particularly upset by it. Um... it hurt my feelings a little bit (which sounds ridiculous) but really, he was totally, totally, totally fine.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 16, 2013 1:26 am 
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Tofulish wrote:
I was just offered a bunch of money to go back to work on a project for 2 months. I really miss having money and part of me wants to go - its just 50 hours a week for 8 weeks and I could afford to live for another year on the money.

But I really hate leaving L and I think it would be such a huge shift for her from being with me all the time to being in a care situation for the bulk of the day.

How do people transition their slightly older kids into a care situation? What kind of care could you get for 2 months anyway? Any thoughts?


Here in Germany there is a transition time for the kids. That means one parent goes with them to daycare when they start. There are lots of different plans depending on the kid but it usually goes like this: parent and kid stay and leave together, a couple of days later the parent leaves for some time and comes back, next the kid stays alone for a couple of days, takes her nap and then they stay the whole day. How is this stuff working in the US?


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 16, 2013 7:40 am 
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There are day cares around that will take kids for a temporary situation and without notice, although they might not be totally ideal in terms of philosophy, Malka has done very well in them when she has had to go because other care fell through. There are a lot of nannies who don't mind doing short stints, but we found finding a nanny pretty tough. Our standards were higher for a nanny than a daycare, because if it is only one person responsible for your kid with no immediate oversight, that person better be really good. Also, with a nanny you have less security about whether they will show up on time, call off on short notice, etc. Whatever you do, I would have a back up plan. There are also home daycares which are sometimes more flexible, but it is hard to find them and figure out which ones are good.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 16, 2013 9:32 am 
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My BIL/SIL's nanny quit suddenly a week ago, and they were able to find a spot at a nice local daycare immediately. You might have to call around some, but you might be pleasantly surprised. I wouldn't even tell them it's for a 2 month stint - circumstances might always change, after all.

SitterCity is a good way to find childcare situations. Or try calling local colleges with child development programs, they might have students or recent grads who are looking for something like that.


More broadly, it sounds like a great opportunity. Obviously you need to decide for yourself, but I think Leela would probably do fine at this age. 8 weeks' work for security for a year sounds pretty lucrative, and you mentioned that you'd planned on going back eventually. This sounds like a good way to test out how that would work.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 16, 2013 10:05 am 
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We found care.com a little better than sitter city in this area.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 16, 2013 10:23 am 
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i also think it might be good for you to try it, it sounds like a great opportunity indeed.
i think with kids a lot of it is how you present it (is it a horrible thing to go to daycare, or a chance to make new friends and have a good time?). I tell you, my girls LOVED LOVED LOVED the things they did at daycare (art, toys, and food, the important stuff).

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 16, 2013 11:25 am 
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torque wrote:
I tell you, my girls LOVED LOVED LOVED the things they did at daycare (art, toys, and food, the important stuff).


Seriously, the thing that helped me get over the parent-guilt I had about "leaving" E at daycare in the beginning was how much fun he had there. It made me realize that as much fun as we had together, and as much variety as I felt like I offered him, when we were home together, we did the stuff that I liked/could tolerate/had energy for and that meant he missed out on some things. For instance, we rarely did much in the way of art back then, because any art project went like this: "well, I just spent 40 minutes getting this ready, you painted for 60 seconds, now the kitchen is trashed and I have to clean it all up. Next time I think this a good idea, maybe I'll just stab myself in the neck instead."

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 16, 2013 11:36 am 
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coldandsleepy wrote:
torque wrote:
I tell you, my girls LOVED LOVED LOVED the things they did at daycare (art, toys, and food, the important stuff).


Seriously, the thing that helped me get over the parent-guilt I had about "leaving" E at daycare in the beginning was how much fun he had there. It made me realize that as much fun as we had together, and as much variety as I felt like I offered him, when we were home together, we did the stuff that I liked/could tolerate/had energy for and that meant he missed out on some things. For instance, we rarely did much in the way of art back then, because any art project went like this: "well, I just spent 40 minutes getting this ready, you painted for 60 seconds, now the kitchen is trashed and I have to clean it all up. Next time I think this a good idea, maybe I'll just stab myself in the neck instead."

Yep! School has been the best thing that has happened to our family. Also, there are things I don't know about or am unlikely to think to teach Grey, like about algae. He also learned about the horned owl. They also teach him to clean. It's amazing and I thought it would be hard but after the first few days I realized that it was so great for him. It is also wonderful because he gets to experience life where he is not the center of the universe.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 16, 2013 11:41 am 
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I think small children adjust to change much much quicker than adults do. Also I would like to be Leela's short-term nanny.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 16, 2013 12:15 pm 
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^^yet ANOTHER reason we need to get this PPKommune thing into gear already.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 16, 2013 12:44 pm 
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Take the job t'lish! L will be fine. She is such a good kid and loves other children and people that I think she would do well in daycare. Its only for 2 months and like you said if you can live off that money for another year I don't know how you could say No to it. I couldn't at least. Don't tell the daycares it's only for a few months. They shouldn't need to know that.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 16, 2013 1:55 pm 
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+1 to what JENNA just said. Dooooooo iiiiiiiiiiiiit. Pretty sure Leela would love it.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Thu Oct 17, 2013 8:49 am 
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Tofulish that sounds like a great opportunity to test out going back to work. I say do it!

So the transition period is over for preschool but on Tuesday Ada came home and told me she cried because she missed me. So I emailed the teacher to see if that actually happened and it ends up she did start crying a little bit after I left :-( Apparently she was fine and back to her happy chatty self after a bit but ugh. And then this morning when I dropped her off I played with her a bit and then said that I'm going to go and she grabbed on to me (and Alice who was in the mei tai) and wouldn't let go and started saying mommy and sobbing. So the lead teacher asked her if she wanted to take a walk with her and she went and I hardly got to say goodbye. Anyway, I almost burst into tears walking home and I'm sure she'll be fine after a bit but it was much easier handling her going when I knew she was happy when I left. I really want to call school and see how she is but I'm sure they would call if she still wasn't ok.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Thu Oct 17, 2013 10:49 am 
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When J (my cousin's wife) was dropping off S (the baby) this morning, she mentioned that they'd given her some cereal earlier this week. She'd said last week that she was going to ask their ped about it at their next appointment, but that hasn't happened yet so I'd assumed she wouldn't give her cereal before then. I didn't want to say anything because, you know, not my kid - and I was sure the ped would tell them to wait a bit longer, but they didn't even wait to ask! S will be 4 months old next week. I just don't get it. What is the big hurry?

So I kept my mouth shut, and then a few minutes later J mentions that S had a tummy ache the last couple of days but seems to be better today. Uh, maybe her stomach was upset because CEREAL? At less than 4 months old?? Ugh.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Thu Oct 17, 2013 11:42 am 
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ugh. there's still so much floating around about how if you feed them solids they will sleep through the night. MAGICALLY!

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Thu Oct 17, 2013 12:05 pm 
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She already sleeps through the night! That's the part I really don't understand - J talks about her sleeping like 7 hours at a time at night! WHUT.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Thu Oct 17, 2013 8:49 pm 
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Demanded oatmeal.

Walked away.

Completely refused to come back and eat it when it was cooked and ready, 2 minutes later.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Fri Oct 18, 2013 12:20 am 
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poopiebitch wrote:
S will be 4 months old next week. I just don't get it. What is the big hurry?

My mom is still going with the advice from the 70s and 80s, where you can start giving them cereal at 3 months to help fill them up. (You know, if they're breastfeeding 'too much.') My sister had a video of feeding her baby cereal at 3 months and I was in the poopiebitch camp -- what's the rush?

BTW, before I had kids, I thought cereal in a bottle meant literally breakfast cereal in a bottle of milk, like Captain Crunch or something! Derp.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Fri Oct 18, 2013 3:59 pm 
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torque wrote:
^^yet ANOTHER reason we need to get this PPKommune thing into gear already.


you guys!! we need the ppkommune!!
no worries about people slipping our kids dairy or god forbid a real hot dog,

vegan cupcakes all around and buttloads of delliciously cooked food for each meal!

no one will ask us where we get our protein from and our kids will all be bffs!

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Last edited by LisaPunk on Fri Oct 18, 2013 4:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Fri Oct 18, 2013 4:03 pm 
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poopiebitch wrote:
When J (my cousin's wife) was dropping off S (the baby) this morning, she mentioned that they'd given her some cereal earlier this week. She'd said last week that she was going to ask their ped about it at their next appointment, but that hasn't happened yet so I'd assumed she wouldn't give her cereal before then. I didn't want to say anything because, you know, not my kid - and I was sure the ped would tell them to wait a bit longer, but they didn't even wait to ask! S will be 4 months old next week. I just don't get it. What is the big hurry?

So I kept my mouth shut, and then a few minutes later J mentions that S had a tummy ache the last couple of days but seems to be better today. Uh, maybe her stomach was upset because CEREAL? At less than 4 months old?? Ugh.


ive been surprised how fast the people i know start giving their babies food.
i mean it;s not my place to judge it just surprises me.

i mentioned in the BLW thread that apparently BP's cousin who is 4 months already eats frosting, cheese and crackers, milk shakes, and ice cream (SUGAR! DAIRY OH GOD!)

my best friend gave her baby solids super early. i swear it seemed like she was 3 months but maybe it was 4.
everything ive read said to wait til 6 months so their guts are developed enough but again like you said it's hard to tell other people what to do with their kid

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It's just funny to think that we could go through years of this, become the president of the damn country, and still, we'd be eating pasta with veggies at every. damn. function.~~Joyfulgirl


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Sat Oct 19, 2013 4:03 am 
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LisaPunk wrote:
everything ive read said to wait til 6 months so their guts are developed enough but again like you said it's hard to tell other people what to do with their kid

I just waited until my kids seemed interested in food and got past the wondering if the food might be a nipple to suck on or something. Beetroot started grabbing food and putting it in his mouth at 5.5 months, Raygold wasn't interested until about 7 months or so. But, yeah, about 6 months seems pretty standard.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Sun Oct 20, 2013 5:33 pm 
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sweet baby ray. i go out for a few hours, to have fun, what a strange concept, and i come back to a twilight zone where nobody is talking to each other and everyone denies anything has happened. Except Baggy, who is almost in tears because she doesn't know what the hell is happening. from the way things look, either my kid did something really horrible (which, i am sorry to say, i have a real hard time believing. i mean, she's a normal teen who makes mistakes and is rude to me on occasion, but she also holds doors for strangers and is genuinely concerned about how other people feel) or everyone here is just frigging out of contact with reality.
that's it, next time Baggy comes to any and all meetups, can't leave her at home. At least I know Leela will be happy!!

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Sun Oct 20, 2013 7:09 pm 
Seagull of the PPK
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an update, we have figure it out- the kid was on the computer the ENTIRE time i was gone, not getting up to eat or anything, and feelings were hurt, or something.
these damn kids nowadays and their interwebbing. calgon, take me away to some hummus-filled vegan commune with tofulish and jenna (and all the other amazeballs PPKParents and non-PPKparent-but-still-awesome-types) where we can belly laugh, roll down hills, and hang out with goats all day. i'll bring the hula hoops.

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