| Register  | FAQ  | Search | Login 
It is currently Wed Aug 27, 2014 12:07 pm

All times are UTC - 6 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 817 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28 ... 33  Next
Author Message
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Jul 31, 2013 9:23 am 
Offline
Has Isa on speed dial
User avatar

Joined: Wed Dec 07, 2011 10:41 am
Posts: 84
Location: W Mi
Me: okay bud, 10 more minutes.
H: no.
Me:okay what would be a fair number?
H: 10 minutes.
Me:sounds good. *snort*

_________________
Formerly peach b.s.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Jul 31, 2013 9:30 am 
Offline
Drunk Dialed Ian MacKaye
User avatar

Joined: Fri Nov 05, 2010 9:57 am
Posts: 1825
Location: Scotland
Hahahaha!

_________________
http://reallycrabbycrafter.blogspot.com
http://www.etsy.com/shop/TheTartanVicar


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Aug 14, 2013 1:23 pm 
Offline
Nailed to the V
User avatar

Joined: Sun Feb 05, 2012 1:58 pm
Posts: 546
Location: pdx
On public transit this morning, I see this kid (maybe 3 yrs old?) wearing a big ole helmet and clutching a scooter.. chortling about various things. All of a sudden he wails YOU HAVE NO HAIR!! I turned around (so did everyone else too) and saw a bald man smiling and nodding at the kid saying "you're right."

_________________
You know what would probably be a more effective ritual? Telling the person who you want to shut up, "You better not talk or we'll pound you." -Footface


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Aug 14, 2013 2:34 pm 
Offline
Drunk Dialed Ian MacKaye
User avatar

Joined: Fri Nov 05, 2010 9:57 am
Posts: 1825
Location: Scotland
julialegume wrote:
On public transit this morning, I see this kid (maybe 3 yrs old?) wearing a big ole helmet and clutching a scooter.. chortling about various things. All of a sudden he wails YOU HAVE NO HAIR!! I turned around (so did everyone else too) and saw a bald man smiling and nodding at the kid saying "you're right."

That is hilarious! Usually when we are on a train, my 3 year old tells old people the train is going to explode. And then Mr Crabby and I fidget awkwardly, while everyone glares at us like we are terrorists or something.

_________________
http://reallycrabbycrafter.blogspot.com
http://www.etsy.com/shop/TheTartanVicar


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Aug 14, 2013 4:32 pm 
Offline
Seagull of the PPK
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:46 pm
Posts: 7894
Location: Brasil
years ago on her first flight, (she was 4?) FC grandly enjoyed the flight and must have been overtired because when the plane first began its descent she announced her delight by hollering at top volume [and with the exact intonation that you wouldn't want to hear]: "THE PLANE'S GOING DOWN MOMMY! WE'RE GOING DOWN!" when the ladies behind us gasped and someone seemed to stifle a scream across the aisle I tried to shut her up and she got all upset and instead of quieting down changed her tone, so instead of gleeful, happy "We're going down!" it became tearful and whiney but still loud "THE PLANE'S GOING DOOOOOOWN". How we didn't end up on the no-fly list is beyond me.

_________________
Buddha says 'Meh'.--matwinser
I'm just a drunk who likes fruit. -- Desdemona


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Aug 14, 2013 5:43 pm 
Offline
Grandfathered In
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 1:41 pm
Posts: 9517
Location: Seattle
chompy7 this morning: Hey, Pop! I had a great dream!

Me: Oh yeah? What was it about?

chompy7: I was a big predator, bigger than a shark. We were going around hunting little fish!

Me: Really!

chompy7: It was fun!

_________________
Did somebody say Keep on rockin?


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Sep 04, 2013 1:12 pm 
Offline
Drunk Dialed Ian MacKaye
User avatar

Joined: Fri Nov 05, 2010 9:57 am
Posts: 1825
Location: Scotland
Went to see the gynecologist today. I'd explained why we were going there, but then (at the top of his lungs int he waiting room, which made me laugh my asparagus off) Beet referred to the gyn as the "butt doctor" and then later as the "poop doctor" and later in the waiting room (we were there for a long time), Raygold referred to the Scottish flag as "The Scottish X." That last one really killed me.

_________________
http://reallycrabbycrafter.blogspot.com
http://www.etsy.com/shop/TheTartanVicar


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Tue Sep 24, 2013 1:52 am 
Offline
Grandfathered In
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 1:41 pm
Posts: 9517
Location: Seattle
chompy7: I have a new name for McCloud! {one of our cats; chompy is always coming with new names for our cats}

Me: What is it?

chompy7: Joel!

Hysterical laughing.

_________________
Did somebody say Keep on rockin?


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Tue Sep 24, 2013 7:14 am 
Offline
Level 7 Vegan
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 3:30 pm
Posts: 1570
Location: Maine
W: What are you wearing, Mommy?

M: Shorts.

W: Shorts...that's a nickname for pants!*

*He knows Walt is "short for Walter."


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Tue Sep 24, 2013 7:37 am 
Offline
Semen Strong
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 7:10 pm
Posts: 18877
Location: Cliffbar NJ
I love that Leela has now decided that no one gets to touch her butt without permission. If you grab it (because its oh so grabbable), she says "WHAT NO! MY BUTT! WHAT NO!" And then I have to apologize for touching her butt and then she gives me permission to touch her back or her hair instead :)

_________________
My oven is bigger on the inside, and it produces lots of wibbly wobbly, cake wakey... stuff. - The PoopieB.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Sep 25, 2013 9:20 am 
Offline
Heeeerrrrree's JACKY!
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 1:39 pm
Posts: 3958
Location: the Eug
Yesterday, after some messing around in the kitchen, Shorty comes into the livingroom with a mug and says "Earl Grey, Hot"

_________________
Don't mind my breasts and vagina, I'm a gay man.---Idatetatooedguys.

"Tots: the universal food band-aid... better than a mother's kiss. Healin' wounds since 1954." Meggs


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 2:24 am 
Offline
Has it on Blue Vinyl
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 9:42 pm
Posts: 2196
We've had lots of pretty entertaining conversations about (and imaginary adventures with) the impending baby, but one thing she does repeatedly that cracks me up is patting my belly and saying, "Hm. What this whole clump in here?" And then giggling.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Tue Oct 01, 2013 9:12 pm 
Offline
Has it on Blue Vinyl
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jan 05, 2011 7:44 pm
Posts: 2144
I'm just proud that Carlos now says "poop."


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 02, 2013 1:43 am 
Offline
Nailed to the V
User avatar

Joined: Thu Aug 30, 2012 12:39 am
Posts: 599
Location: Sweden
Me: What did you say? (because I didn't hear, not because he said something bad)
R: What DID I say?
repeat ad lib...

_________________
I tend to hook up with people who give me chocolate, but I fail to see how this is a bad thing./tofulish


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 02, 2013 1:49 am 
Offline
Plays The Sims 2 religiously
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 11:20 pm
Posts: 7279
Location: Portland, OR
kfad wrote:
Yesterday, after some messing around in the kitchen, Shorty comes into the livingroom with a mug and says "Earl Grey, Hot"

yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

_________________
i would schmear marmite on a moist scrotum for Mars. - interrobang?!
"Not everything." ~ mumbles (1973-2013) - mumbles


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Mon Oct 14, 2013 3:22 pm 
Offline
And you never will.
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 8:41 pm
Posts: 4300
Location: Memphis
"Hey mummy, look! It's a jackass lantern!"

_________________
I'm in a pure mood with poopietits now. Damn her jugs! - interrobang?!
give my you inquiries! and give poopie you burritos. - acr
Sometimes I think, it's really my lack of cybernetic implants that keeps me from being truly human. - Mars


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Mon Oct 14, 2013 5:08 pm 
Offline
Nooch of Earl
User avatar

Joined: Sun Dec 12, 2010 2:18 pm
Posts: 3690
Location: Bella Napoli
So we were eating at a restaurant with my MIL.

Violet points at a cocktail napkin that came out with her drink, and asks what it's for. I say "it's for wiping."

She says, "wiping...butts?" And grabs it and reaches down to do so.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Mon Oct 14, 2013 5:12 pm 
Offline
The Real Hamburger Helper
User avatar

Joined: Thu Feb 17, 2011 10:13 pm
Posts: 2332
Ha ha! Those last two are amazing!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Tue Oct 22, 2013 12:09 am 
Offline
Plays The Sims 2 religiously
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 11:20 pm
Posts: 7279
Location: Portland, OR
Overheard at Michael's:

Mom: "...Well, let's think about it later" (I got the impression she was trying to say 'no' to a purchase request by her kid)

Kid: "I just thought about it now, and it felt good!"

_________________
i would schmear marmite on a moist scrotum for Mars. - interrobang?!
"Not everything." ~ mumbles (1973-2013) - mumbles


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Tue Oct 22, 2013 10:36 pm 
Offline
Heeeerrrrree's JACKY!
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 1:39 pm
Posts: 3958
Location: the Eug
Mars wrote:
Overheard at Michael's:

Mom: "...Well, let's think about it later" (I got the impression she was trying to say 'no' to a purchase request by her kid)

Kid: "I just thought about it now, and it felt good!"


I have had this conversation, in Micheals. And JoAnn's, and Target, and ... many others.


I know mine is much older... but should I worry that the 13 year old taught herself to say " I am the dark Lard" in Italian?

_________________
Don't mind my breasts and vagina, I'm a gay man.---Idatetatooedguys.

"Tots: the universal food band-aid... better than a mother's kiss. Healin' wounds since 1954." Meggs


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Tue Oct 22, 2013 11:58 pm 
Offline
Semen Strong
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 7:10 pm
Posts: 18877
Location: Cliffbar NJ
We do all these fun things with Leela, but she still seems to only have stories about the less pleasant things that happen.

At the moment her repertoire includes the "Cat Booboo" story ("Cat booboo! Cat washing! Bucket! Medicine! Dog biting!" translation: Carlito got bitten by 2 dogs and we had to wash him in a bucket and give him medicine), the "Dog Poopoo story" (Dog Poo Poo In House! Dog Poo Outside! In Baggy! because Cuddles pooped inside one day), the "Cat Vominit" story (Cat Vominit! because our cats vomit on everything).

I am looking forward to a story that doesn't prominently feature animals and bodily functions.

_________________
My oven is bigger on the inside, and it produces lots of wibbly wobbly, cake wakey... stuff. - The PoopieB.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 23, 2013 3:38 am 
Offline
Drunk Dialed Ian MacKaye
User avatar

Joined: Fri Nov 05, 2010 9:57 am
Posts: 1825
Location: Scotland
poopiebitch wrote:
"Hey mummy, look! It's a jackass lantern!"

OMG, I'm dying!

_________________
http://reallycrabbycrafter.blogspot.com
http://www.etsy.com/shop/TheTartanVicar


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Oct 23, 2013 7:23 am 
Offline
Seagull of the PPK
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:46 pm
Posts: 7894
Location: Brasil
yesterday i took the kid out for lunch at the little strip mall thing in town where her friend's parents own a pizza place. I saw a littler boy skateboarding and I said to Baggy "hey, that kid looks like he could be Martino's (pizza place family) little brother."
"Mom, you racist! Just because he looks Latino he has to be Martino's little brother?"
"You told me Martino was from Italy!"
"He is! And that's Latino!"

at which i realize yet again, this whole racial business makes so much sense. ^eyeroll^

_________________
Buddha says 'Meh'.--matwinser
I'm just a drunk who likes fruit. -- Desdemona


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Sun Oct 27, 2013 8:16 pm 
Offline
Wears Durian Helmet
User avatar

Joined: Fri Oct 22, 2010 2:56 pm
Posts: 848
Location: Halifax
Malcolm: Mommy, today Quinn was picking his nose. So gross.
Me: umm... yeah, that's really gross
Malcolm: Yeah, then he ate his boogers
Me: Well that's even more gross. Why do you think he did that?
Malcolm, deep in thought for a minute, then: I guess he was just really hungry?


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things 2.0
PostPosted: Sun Oct 27, 2013 8:21 pm 
Offline
***LIES!!!***
User avatar

Joined: Sun Feb 12, 2012 4:10 pm
Posts: 3710
Which reminds me of this frequent statement from Malka: Mommy, I got boogers. Boogers yummy!


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 817 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28 ... 33  Next

All times are UTC - 6 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group
Template made by DEVPPL/ThatBigForum and fancied up by What Cheer