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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Mon Feb 17, 2014 3:09 pm 
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Plays The Sims 2 religiously
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Clearly that measuring cup was made by mermaid slave labor. Shame!

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i would schmear marmite on a moist scrotum for Mars. - interrobang?!
"Not everything." ~ mumbles (1973-2013) - mumbles


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Mon Feb 17, 2014 3:31 pm 
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Thinks chickens are assholes
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sashi wrote:
She has watched the Lorax recently! Ha. I must have missed that part. It all makes sense now.


When I was explaining why I was vegan to the Mr's curious kids his daughter proclaimed "you are the Lorax, you speak for the trees" :D


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Mon Feb 17, 2014 7:17 pm 
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Semen Strong
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After requesting a variety of foods and then rejecting them once they were prepared, I was so annoyed. And then she looks at me and says "You having a rough day." Hahaha! Thanks kid!

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But on a cold winter night, when the wind whispers through the trees and a bright, white moon hangs heavy in the air, you might hear a sad cry like someone thinking he knows what's best for you, and that'll be the white man a-passin' you by. just mumbles


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Tue Feb 18, 2014 9:37 am 
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Can't Dance, Isn't Part of Revolution
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My son said something hilariously inappropriate yesterday but I can't quite remember what it was. The hardest thing is not to burst out laughing, which of course would encourage him to say it again.

One thing that does amuse me, is when I (for example) burn myself in the kitchen and swear, he'll look all concerned and say, "Why are you saying f--- Mummy?" I guess he associates it with me hurting myself.


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Tue Feb 18, 2014 1:53 pm 
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***LIES!!!***
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Malka saw the handicap symbol on a parking spot and exclaimed, "he's sitting on the moon, mama!"


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Wed Feb 19, 2014 1:11 pm 
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I was helping Ahmad (7), clean up his room, and earlier I had said, "project fix the bed" like on those home improvement shows.

So he inserts himself into the laundry basket bottom first and says, "project relax-o-laundry", then topples over and bumps his head. Then he says, "relax-o-laundry, worst.idea.EVER!"


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Wed Feb 19, 2014 7:31 pm 
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Not NOT A Furry
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Location: massachusetts
"No thank you please!"


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Wed Feb 19, 2014 9:15 pm 
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Because Bob Barker Told Me To
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Scarlett is doing this hilarious thing lately where instead of having a tantrum when she doesn't want to do something, she looks up at me and bats her eyelashes and smiles and says, "no thank you, mommy." And then she often wins, dammit!


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Fri Feb 21, 2014 4:31 pm 
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Because Bob Barker Told Me To
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Location: Brooklyn, NY
I just started using a diva cup and had a two kid audience in the bathroom. Ada asked what I was doing and I gave her a brief explanation. As I was putting it in she started clapping. Then when I was done she shouted "Good job!" Then she said "Are you sitting on it?"


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Fri Feb 21, 2014 4:31 pm 
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Because Bob Barker Told Me To
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I think she thinks I did some sort of magic trick.


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Fri Feb 21, 2014 5:24 pm 
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Semen Strong
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Location: Cliffbar NJ
Your vagina is a magic top hat! I laughed so hard at this story!

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But on a cold winter night, when the wind whispers through the trees and a bright, white moon hangs heavy in the air, you might hear a sad cry like someone thinking he knows what's best for you, and that'll be the white man a-passin' you by. just mumbles


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Fri Feb 21, 2014 5:29 pm 
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Lubes With Earth Balance
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Sashi, that is forking hilarious. On a sidenote though, how freakin unfair that you have your period back already, jeeez.


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Sun Feb 23, 2014 2:24 pm 
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Because Bob Barker Told Me To
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Location: Brooklyn, NY
Ugh, tell me about it. I got it back a few months ago.


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Mon Feb 24, 2014 7:42 pm 
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Trapped On A Desert Island With A Cow
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Not the kid saying things, but my nanny charge has a new Tonka truck that talks, and I swear to God I just heard it say cheerfully, "Put something in my butt!". I've been trying to figure out what else it could have been and I'm coming up with nothing...

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Jack Sprat could eat no fat and his wife could eat no lean, and then their daughter became a vegan and got a boyfriend with an onion allergy. --- My dad.


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Mon Feb 24, 2014 7:48 pm 
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Semen Strong
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I assume that the butt is the trunk, but that is hilarious! It sounds like an designer with a dirty mind had some fun!

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But on a cold winter night, when the wind whispers through the trees and a bright, white moon hangs heavy in the air, you might hear a sad cry like someone thinking he knows what's best for you, and that'll be the white man a-passin' you by. just mumbles


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:06 pm 
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***LIES!!!***
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Malka looooves the Diva cup insertion process. It is really, really fascinating for her.


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Tue Feb 25, 2014 5:47 pm 
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Because Bob Barker Told Me To
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My partner thinks he's so funny and taught Scarlett that beer is called "mommy juice." We went to a party with a bunch of my coworkers and she ran around pointing out people's "mommy juice." Way to make me look like a drunk in front of my boss, kid!


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Tue Feb 25, 2014 6:00 pm 
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Level 7 Vegan
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Location: Maine
"Mommy, close your eyes. Now it's dark inside of you."


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Tue Feb 25, 2014 7:45 pm 
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Semen Strong
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Leela goes up to every adult she sees, asks their name and has a conversation and then says "I a little bit shy.". Which makes everyone crack up because she is obviously completely not shy.

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But on a cold winter night, when the wind whispers through the trees and a bright, white moon hangs heavy in the air, you might hear a sad cry like someone thinking he knows what's best for you, and that'll be the white man a-passin' you by. just mumbles


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Thu Feb 27, 2014 9:16 am 
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Loves Carrots (in the biblical sense)
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At dinner the other night, my 3 year old daughter said "When I get bigger, I'm gonna try beer and see what happens".


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Thu Feb 27, 2014 10:43 am 
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Because Bob Barker Told Me To
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Ada's new favorite phrase is "oh crepe". "Oh crepe, I forgot my music instruments in the bedroom." "Oh crepe, I forgot to eat seaweed snacks."


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Thu Feb 27, 2014 12:39 pm 
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Lubes With Earth Balance
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there's a hardcore song my kids always go nuts to that has a line "in the sand at Gilgo Beach" and well, you can guess what Dahlia is singing along to that...


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Thu Feb 27, 2014 1:27 pm 
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Semen Strong
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Ha! So funny!

My husband walked into the room and Leela said "Hi Daddy! How's your penis?"

We basically just fell over laughing.

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But on a cold winter night, when the wind whispers through the trees and a bright, white moon hangs heavy in the air, you might hear a sad cry like someone thinking he knows what's best for you, and that'll be the white man a-passin' you by. just mumbles


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Thu Feb 27, 2014 1:29 pm 
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Married to the wolfman
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E ambushed me the other day as I walked into the living room, throwing off his bath towel and shouting WELCOME TO THE PENIS SHOW!

(Living in a house with one adult male and two male children, buddy, I feel like I've been at the penis show for some time.)

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"Hummus; a gentleman's vice." -- Mars

coldandsleepy cooks, THE BLOG!


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 Post subject: Re: Kids say the darnedest things
PostPosted: Fri Feb 28, 2014 3:25 am 
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Nailed to the V
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"I'm a big boy!"
"Yes you are."
"I was small before. Yesterday, I was small."

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I tend to hook up with people who give me chocolate, but I fail to see how this is a bad thing./tofulish


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