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 Post subject: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Mon Feb 21, 2011 7:59 pm 
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Just Loathin' Around!
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Location: bindlestiff
There is a Mr. Bran doppelganger at one of the houses across the way. Across the road and up a hill. Tuxedo cat but without the charming/terrifying mustache Mr. Bran has. I see him occasionally on the hill but never up close.

Just today I was looking out the back door that opens onto a small porch. I had my giant leaf pile out there for a month while I waited for the big leaf vacuum to come, but that is another story. But there is still a bit of leaf left over. Here comes big tuxedo cat over the small border to my neighbor's driveway and into the leaves. I wave at him and he then turns around, scratches and proceeds to take the longest cat shiitake ever. I mean it took awhile, his back to me to whole time. I pick Bran up to look out the back door at his new nemesis but he seems more interested in the wind and trees and look there's a leaf mom I want down. I rattle the door and tuxedo cat turns, sees me and takes off, back across the road to his hill.

I'm pretty sure this is war. Otherwise this thread should have been titled Tale From Mr. Bran

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Mon Feb 21, 2011 8:11 pm 
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Drinks Wild Tofurkey
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A blatant show of disrespect!

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Mon Feb 21, 2011 8:24 pm 
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Just Loathin' Around!
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That's what I'm talking about. Mr. Bran and I may be doing some midnight disrespectin' of our own.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Mon Feb 21, 2011 11:04 pm 
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Drinks Wild Tofurkey
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I will too, in two weeks! We'll show the mustards!

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Tue Feb 22, 2011 6:08 am 
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Panda, you might want to think this through.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Tue Feb 22, 2011 7:00 am 
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We have the same problem with a Tuxedo cat (Guinness aka Mr Jingles), he is both charming and poop expressing, it is indeed a difficult situation to be in Pandacookie.

I think you should be wary of Invictus' reckless disregard for your safety and take heed of Vantine's wise words. He may just be firing a couple of warning shots across your leafy bow, retaliation could open the doors to all sorts of terrifying things!


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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Tue Feb 22, 2011 9:17 am 
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I hope this means that you and Mr. Bran will be pooping in Mr. Nemesiskitty's leaf pile.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Tue Feb 22, 2011 11:21 am 
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No retaliatory poop yet. Yet.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Tue Feb 22, 2011 11:21 am 
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I am however monitoring the situation closely.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Tue Feb 22, 2011 11:37 am 
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baaaah ha ha ha! i laughed so hard. thank you and Mr. Bran - and keep us posted on the retaliatory poop. :)


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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Tue Feb 22, 2011 11:49 am 
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I'd suggest fortifying yourself with some extra Bran and KAPOP oil. If you know what I mean.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Tue Feb 22, 2011 11:55 am 
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Apply some Vaseline first, for a quick getaway.


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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Tue Feb 22, 2011 5:24 pm 
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I am pre-gaming with green smoothies. Let's do this.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Tue Feb 22, 2011 10:04 pm 
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I wonder if Lycophyte is ready to bail you out of jail should your midnight poo adventure not go well?

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A whole lot of access and privilege goes into being sanctimonious pricks J-Dub
Dessert is currently a big bowl of sanctimonious, passive aggressive vegan enduced boak. Fezza
You people are way less funny than Pandacookie. Sucks to be you.-interrobang?!


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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Tue Feb 22, 2011 10:13 pm 
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My head is filled with images of you and Mr. Bran pooing side by side on your neighbor's lawn. Someone get over there quickly and take pictures! This needs to be in Panda's upcoming coffee table book.


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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 9:42 pm 
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I think an MSPaint interpretation of panders' and Mr. Bran's poopleaf adventures would a stellar addition to the coffee table book.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 10:04 pm 
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No updates today. Nemesis cat was not seen. Retaliatory action not needed. Yet.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Thu Feb 24, 2011 12:58 pm 
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I will be following this situation closely and I expect updates if and when shiitake goes down.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Thu Feb 24, 2011 1:19 pm 
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Nero had a nemesis cat and he got out a few times and got in a fight with said nemesis. Both times nemesis cat peed on poor little Nero!

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Thu Feb 24, 2011 1:56 pm 
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Bran is pretty big but this cat looks to be similar in size if not bigger.

I have the side porch door open today. I watch.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Thu Feb 24, 2011 3:18 pm 
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ijustdiedinside wrote:
Nero had a nemesis cat and he got out a few times and got in a fight with said nemesis. Both times nemesis cat peed on poor little Nero!


I love cats. I don't know why peeing on one another's heads isn't used more often in human relationships. We go through so much effort to express what a stream of peas could accomplish so much more elegantly.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Fri Feb 25, 2011 8:57 am 
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Tofulish wrote:
ijustdiedinside wrote:
Nero had a nemesis cat and he got out a few times and got in a fight with said nemesis. Both times nemesis cat peed on poor little Nero!


I love cats. I don't know why peeing on one another's heads isn't used more often in human relationships. We go through so much effort to express what a stream of peas could accomplish so much more elegantly.


I'd be dehydrated within 20 minutes if I was allowed to pee on everyone I'd like to.


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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Fri Feb 25, 2011 3:12 pm 
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Important Update.
Some of you may know that is has been rather cold in my house this winter. Mr. Bran has taken up the habit of burrowing under the blankets on the bed at night instead of taking his usual place on a pillow by my head. This morning at around 7 am he left to head to the kitchen to eat. About 10 minutes later he returned to the bed, insisted upon burrowing under the covers and then settled in and farted on me.
I am now concerned that Mr. Bran and Tuxedo Cat From Across the Way may be in cahoots against me.

I am wary and continue to watch for further signs. Expect future updates.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Fri Feb 25, 2011 3:24 pm 
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You might need to go to the fart store and stock up on ammo.

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 Post subject: Re: Tales From Mr. Bran
PostPosted: Fri Feb 25, 2011 8:38 pm 
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Oh dear, this situation may just be a slice of a larger conspiracy!

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