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 Post subject: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 2:58 pm 
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I was reminded of a joke the other day, "how can you tell who the tourists are in Portland? They're the ones with umbrellas."

In San Francisco (at least my part of SF) you can always tell the tourists because they are all wearing identical polar fleece vests/pullovers with 'SAN FRANCISCO' embroidered on the breast. This is because they all pack for the Bay Area thinking "it's California! California's warm! California dreamin'! 90210!" and immediately hightail it to the first tourist shop selling warm, life-preserving fleece after they walk across the Golden Gate Bridge their first day here. Also how you spot SF tourists: they're the confused-looking ones shivering on the Golden Gate bridge in tank tops and shorts in July. Or just keep your ears perked for anyone saying "frisco" or struggling to pronounce 'Gough Street'.

When I lived in Hong Kong, it was very easy to spot mainland Chinese tourists. They all wore very similar dark slacks and dark shirts and smoked like forking chimneys.

So, how about you? How do you spot the tourists in your town?

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 3:04 pm 
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Lately whenever I go to Powell's Books (like, to buy a book, which used to be the main reason to go to a bookstore) there are a bunch of people in there taking selfies.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 3:11 pm 
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mainly by how confused they are by the underground system

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 3:12 pm 
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They tend to be confined to a very small area of the city, usually at the castle, around the Robin Hood statue or at The Trip To Jerusalem pub, taking photos of everything. Nobody who lives here needs photos of dirty concrete buildings.


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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 3:55 pm 
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Funny, I grew up in SoCal and never learned how to use an umbrella. I once had a manager offer me his when I said I had never owned one.

For the DC area, it is generally pretty easy. Fanny packs seem to be big among tourists. Also they are ones holding maps. They may also be wearing a brightly colored cap (as part of a group) or even stickers with their names on it. It is also weird, I think people tend to walk closer together too if they are tourists. I've noticed it with families more than anything but it is almost like they walk in a small huddle.

In San Diego, it is also fairly easy but they are the ones wearing shorts and tank tops when it is the coldest day of the year (ps, my mom will be wearing a sweater, a jacket and maybe earmuffs). They are also the ones that try to go to the beach in winter because if you haven't been on the west coast, the water isn't really warm and there is a reason surfers wear wet suits year round. They are also confused by many names of things, la jolla isn't pronounced la joe-la.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 4:02 pm 
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The people who have umbrellas.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 4:04 pm 
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Anywhere in the lowlands: Tourists are people who don't know how to ride a bike, use a bike lane, follow bike signs, or any/all of the above. Tourists also wander aimlessly in and out of bike lanes (as pedestrians) and then have the gall to be angry at the bikes.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 4:10 pm 
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The only streets that exist are Virginia and Center, between city hall and the university. People taking pictures of the "biggest little city" sign. Anyone who goes into the bowling stadium, really. Basically anyone who goes into a large downtown casino and plays a non-penny-machine with coins and not a club card, with few exceptions. MOST (but again, not all) locals will go to a non-downtown casino, or a small downtown casino. . Or just use a slot machine in a grocery store or convenience store. Or Dotty's. Or or or or ororororor.

Anyone who pronounced Nevada with a long A in the second syllable - that's a big sign for people coming to a conference or whatever. But that won't weed out the California tourists, haha.
Anyone who refers to the casinos as skyscrapers without irony.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 4:14 pm 
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Well dressed middle aged folks walking down sixth street.

During SXSW you see a LOT more cowboy boots and hats too. Especially film people from LA.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 4:16 pm 
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People walking sooooooooooo sloooooooooow. And gawking at things, as they impede traffic. Keep it moving Bucko!

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 4:17 pm 
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Anyone who thinks it would be a good idea to drive or walk down Elvis Presley Boulevard for no reason is a tourist (it's... not a nice part of town). Beale Street is packed with tourists on the weekends, because locals know better than to go near Beale on Friday and Saturday nights. Anyone talking about or carrying/wearing anything to do with Elvis, especially in August (Death Week). Anyone who asks how to get to Graceland or asks if you've ever been to Graceland without irony.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 4:32 pm 
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Oh! I just thought of another one. Every Tuesday at the crack of noon there is an emergency alert drill in San Francisco. It sounds like an air raid siren, then there is an announcement in various languages (the one nearest me is English and Cantonese) that "this is just a drill." I call it the "Tuesday Tsunami."

I'm usually in the office when it happens but sometimes when you're out on the street, a small percentage of people will suddenly start looking around in confusion and mild panic and it's hilaaaaarious.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 4:35 pm 
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8ball wrote:
They tend to be confined to a very small area of the city, usually at the castle, around the Robin Hood statue or at The Trip To Jerusalem pub, taking photos of everything. Nobody who lives here needs photos of dirty concrete buildings.


Taking photos of everything is so true.

We don't really get tourists here, but yesterday I saw a group of foreign girls taking a selfie in front of Wilkos...

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 4:35 pm 
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I live near Oxford, and there are A LOT of tourists. Quite often they come in herds. Otherwise it's the people who are taking pictures of everything.... or trying to figure out where "Oxford University" is. **Spoiler Alert** You won't find it.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 4:45 pm 
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We have a lot but they are hard to tell, since our city has doubled in population in the last 10 years, so half of us are from somewhere else. The obvious ones are on the tourist bus route, maps in hand. We do get a lot of backpackers and "wanderers" for lack of a better word, and these are usually obvious from backpacks, scruff; in general we can tell foreign people from 'foreign clothes' which is hard to explain. (dirty shoes. interesting socks. looser and less fancy clothes but with more interesting details or fabrics)

ETA. of course-- once they open their mouths, it is a different story. My city has a really distinct accent and unlike in the US, the higher class people seem to really pile on the accent, not necessarily the working class people.

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Last edited by torque on Wed Nov 19, 2014 4:47 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 4:46 pm 
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lutin wrote:
Anywhere in the lowlands: Tourists are people who don't know how to ride a bike, use a bike lane, follow bike signs, or any/all of the above. Tourists also wander aimlessly in and out of bike lanes (as pedestrians) and then have the gall to be angry at the bikes.


And in Amsterdam, they're often stoned to boot.

The only tourists we get in the town where I currently live are Dutchies or Germans biking through with fully-packed bike bags, looking for the one B&B in town. (Apparently, we're on a well-travelled bike route through Belgium.) I haven't spent enough time in Brussels (where I work) to suss out the typical tourist, but we get a lot of people in our store who get lost trying to find the Comics Museum. Oh, and you see large groups taking up the whole sidewalk, following someone with an umbrella.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 4:50 pm 
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I think for the purposes of this thread we can all agree that maps and photo-taking are universal tourist markers!

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 5:00 pm 
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People who pronounce it WillUHmette instead of WillAMette.

People walking downtown with large pink boxes of Voodoo Donuts.

Note, I have been all of these people at one time or another.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 5:01 pm 
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Seattle has the umbrella thing, too. Although I'm a born and bred local and will occasionally use an umbrella, so whatever. They keep you dry! No shame.

People taking pictures on ferries are for sure tourists. Also, people who try to walk out of the cafe on the ferry with their wine/beer in hand. Like 99.4% of people in Pike Place Market at any given time.


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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 5:02 pm 
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Ha, pronunciations. Anybody thrown by Sequim, Puyallup or similar.


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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 5:04 pm 
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Nebraskalaska wrote:
People who pronounce it WillUHmette instead of WillAMette.

People walking downtown with large pink boxes of Voodoo Donuts.


On one of my jaunts up to Portland one of my fellow passengers was wearing a shirt that read "It's Willamette, Dammit!"

Even better is when you're the jerk with a pink box of Voodoo Donuts in the airport. SO MANY FUNNY AND ORIGINAL COMMENTS.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 5:06 pm 
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Pinko wrote:
Seattle has the umbrella thing, too. Although I'm a born and bred local and will occasionally use an umbrella, so whatever. They keep you dry! No shame.

Business-y people who work downtown are use them because rain coats don't often look great paired with a suit, but you can always tell who those people are because they're dressed in black and have a look of Importance on their faces.

I have an umbrella for special occasions. I've used it twice since moving here.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 5:07 pm 
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Erika, i'm laughing because when I visited my brother in SF, it was in the summer and I was like "WHY IS IT SO forking COLD AT NIGHT?!" I went from Illinois to Las Vegas to SF, so obviously I packed for summer and ending up having to borrow a jacket and buy shoes that weren't platform sandals. The shoes were also because I wasn't prepared for the hills.

This is an industrial town so there's really nothing touristy here, but while waiting for a train once I did have someone ask me if it was common to have to wait for trains so long and I was like, "Well, yeah. There are a couple of manufacturing plants so there are a lot of trains but they're not hard to get around."

In my hometown it's all Lincoln all the time, and there really aren't any particular markers except if you go downtown from April-September you're going to probably run into a bunch of kids on field trips. Occasionally it seems like they bussed in a whole school and the street corners briefly look like New York City. I guess one marker is that no one tells these people it's okay to jaywalk.

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 5:08 pm 
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Ohhh, pronunciations. Besides Nevada itself, Kietzke. . . Moana. . . Mackay. . . Hearing tourists (and GPS voices) try these is. . . it's fun. (Kits-kee, Moh-ann-uh, Mackey)

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 Post subject: Re: How can you tell who the tourists are in your town?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2014 5:09 pm 
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Erika Soyf*cker wrote:
Nebraskalaska wrote:
People who pronounce it WillUHmette instead of WillAMette.

People walking downtown with large pink boxes of Voodoo Donuts.


On one of my jaunts up to Portland one of my fellow passengers was wearing a shirt that read "It's Willamette, Dammit!"

Even better is when you're the jerk with a pink box of Voodoo Donuts in the airport. SO MANY FUNNY AND ORIGINAL COMMENTS.

Every TSA employee is going to confiscate your donuts. Every. Single. One.

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