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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Wed Feb 19, 2014 7:43 pm 
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Eurgh, I've got a stupid thing I'm anxious about. There's a new fancy chocolate shop in town and last week I asked what vegan stuff they had, and was really pleased when they told me to pick any flavour and they could make me some truffles! So I chose a small box of orange flavour and the chocolatier (or whatever chocolate makers are called) told me I could pick them up the next day!

So I went back all expectant, and they had the little box all ready to go with a nice ribbon. The guy told me he'd made 100 chocolates so if any of my vegan friends wanted some I should let them know. I said I'd give the box to my boyfriend for Valentine's but wanted to try a chocolate so bought one separately. It was good, I was pleased, left shop with my little bag.

When I gave the bag to my boyfriend he opened all the elaborate packaging to reveal a completely empty box! Fortunately he thought this was hilarious, but I'm now debating whether to go back, because if they didn't mean to do it they might not believe they would make a mistake like that and think I'm trying to con them out of free chocolates, or worse, the paranoid part of me wonders if they're a pair of jokers who did it on purpose. I know the latter is unlikely, but they did seem a tiny bit on the laddish side. I don't know if it's worth going back given that I'm stressing about it, but I do want my boyfriend to have chocolate!

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Wed Feb 19, 2014 9:35 pm 
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That's very weird.

I would ask about that.


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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Wed Feb 19, 2014 10:00 pm 
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Thank god I have an appointment with my psychologist this Saturday. I'm having a panic disorder relapse. I didn't want to admit it at first, but it's true. I'm stuck fearing the fear, my brain is racing, I'm getting depressed about feeling like my brain is insane and broken, and I can't stop fixating on my obsessive racing thoughts. And the more I fear it, the more scared I get, and repeat. And I feel like all my coping mechanisms are out of reach right now. I don't know why, but I feel like I'm back at square one with this beast.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Thu Feb 20, 2014 10:13 am 
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Aw, I'm so sorry you're experiencing that at the moment Paprikapapaya. Hope you get some good coping advice on the weekend.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Thu Feb 20, 2014 10:19 am 
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dropscone wrote:
Eurgh, I've got a stupid thing I'm anxious about. There's a new fancy chocolate shop in town and last week I asked what vegan stuff they had, and was really pleased when they told me to pick any flavour and they could make me some truffles! So I chose a small box of orange flavour and the chocolatier (or whatever chocolate makers are called) told me I could pick them up the next day!

So I went back all expectant, and they had the little box all ready to go with a nice ribbon. The guy told me he'd made 100 chocolates so if any of my vegan friends wanted some I should let them know. I said I'd give the box to my boyfriend for Valentine's but wanted to try a chocolate so bought one separately. It was good, I was pleased, left shop with my little bag.

When I gave the bag to my boyfriend he opened all the elaborate packaging to reveal a completely empty box! Fortunately he thought this was hilarious, but I'm now debating whether to go back, because if they didn't mean to do it they might not believe they would make a mistake like that and think I'm trying to con them out of free chocolates, or worse, the paranoid part of me wonders if they're a pair of jokers who did it on purpose. I know the latter is unlikely, but they did seem a tiny bit on the laddish side. I don't know if it's worth going back given that I'm stressing about it, but I do want my boyfriend to have chocolate!

So, I steeled myself up to go back to the shop, and explained exactly what happened, and the guy was really apologetic. He gave me double the original chocolates then tried to give me my money back (but I wouldn't take it) as well, so obviously it was a genuine mistake plus they didn't accuse me of lying to them. Phew!

Only trouble is the guy looked quite upset that he'd made the mistake so then I felt bad for making someone else feel bad for the sake of a few quid. I hope the boyfriend likes the chocs after all this!

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Thu Feb 20, 2014 4:41 pm 
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Oh ppp. Big hugs to you xxxxxxx


Having an increase in anxiety since Monday. I'm now 3 weeks off one of my meds and I've had an increase in stress (reporting my father for abuse and getting a big bill from college) and some ocd type stuff coming out. I dropped my knife at work today on the floor and actually threw it out. I couldn't stomach the thought of ever using it ever again. I take my own cutlery to work because I won't use the cutlery there. Only "little" things like this so far no problematic obsessive thoughts or compulsions so far so I am hoping it is more a reaction to increased stress rather than real illness relapse due to being out of the medication discontinuation stage.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Fri Feb 21, 2014 12:34 am 
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my dad's been in the hospital - will be till the 12th. i have not seen him (waiting till he was better/not contagious*). i will see him this weekend. my parents are really big anxiety triggers and hospitals scare me...so this might be a scary/freak out experience. i hate seeing needles/tubes...i get faint/throw up/turn green. i was a sickly child/teen - er visits & days in the hospital have left me with fear. my boyfriend said to 'act like an adult'...he has never had tubes and beeping machines inserted in him.

*went in with pneumonia - got a blood disease while in there. under hospice care now.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Fri Feb 21, 2014 12:49 am 
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Oh hello Anxiety thread. Sigh. I'm having some serious hypochondriac anxiety today. I even went to the doctor. Once I'm in the presence of a health professional, what do ya know, I feel so much better, my heart sounds great, my blood pressure's normal (I swear I felt like I was going to faint not like five minutes before going in). Sigh again! That's the things I hate about hypochondria, no matter how zen I talk myself into about health concerns, how much I distinguish the anxiety from the legit concern... There is still always a 'but why do I feel X?' under there somewhere, the one thing based in reality doesn't go away with a zen mind. Come on, me. You can do this. I have a court date for a traffic incident tomorrow and I really really really can't be working myself up to this kind of fervor before it.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Fri Feb 21, 2014 2:47 am 
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missmuffcake wrote:
... my boyfriend said to 'act like an adult'...he has never had tubes and beeping machines inserted in him.

...


That's really not a very helpful or kind thing for him to say. I do think it's very hard for people who haven't had awful hospital-related experiences combined with an anxious frame of mind to realise they don't know what they're talking about with comments like this, but yeah, he doesn't know what he's talking about- you are an adult and this is how you feel. Good luck with finding a way through.

Is there anyone else you could ask to go with you, maybe like another relative who you feel more calm with?

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"and by "load of facts" you mean a bag of flaming poop, right?" - supercarrot


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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Fri Feb 21, 2014 10:33 am 
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dropscone wrote:

Is there anyone else you could ask to go with you, maybe like another relative who you feel more calm with?



he thinks i act like a kid because i can not say 'iv' or 'vein' without creeping out or squirming. i hate both things and just feel nauseous even typing them. again i was hospitalized on several occasions and the memories/pains stuck. sometimes my boyfriend wants me to be more 'adult' in his head maybe brave. there is only so much i can do without breaking. he needs to understand me more sometimes.

my boyfriend will take me, i just will go, see my dad and get it over with. my mom keeps making me feel guiltily about calling my dad - i call and he does not answer - he cannot hear. going to the hospital was out, i had shingles and with no health insurance and people dropping from the flu - well, no thanks.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Fri Feb 21, 2014 3:09 pm 
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Woke up at 5am in a complete and utter state of panic. I couldn't get myself out of it so by 5.30 I had to put on a relaxation cd. That just helped stop me hyperventilating. So I got up and took the pooch for a walk. That helped burn off some of the panic but not completely. I had to take some extra medication to take the edge off. Work was so hard when I was exhausted and still quite anxious.

Wreaked now and want to sleep but it is only 8pm.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Sat Feb 22, 2014 11:17 am 
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A good long nights sleep seems to have helped me. I slept for about 11hours. Not as anxiety-ridden today. I went for a huge walk. Torn everything out of the bottom of my wardrobe and sorted all my shoes into a keep pile and a throw away pile. Being productive always makes things better.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Thu Feb 27, 2014 1:41 am 
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I keep hearing things in the house as I'm trying to go to sleep, and every time I'm convinced someone is in my house and I get all worked up until I finally get up the courage to leave my room and turn on all the lights and check all the locks (again), then when I'm sure everything is fine I go back to bed and do it all again. I've gone round and checked the locks three times already. It's like I'm so sure someone is going to break into my house tonight I'm just waiting for it to happen.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Sat Mar 01, 2014 3:37 pm 
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my mind just cannot cope with certain 'scary' things today. i blame busy weekends. i think i need to relax more...my body/mind is on 0 right now.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Thu Mar 06, 2014 3:15 am 
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I've had anxiety all week and yesterday started to feel like a panic attack was on the cards so I came home.


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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Tue Mar 18, 2014 5:15 pm 
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My doctor switched me from Zoloft to Lexapro about 3 weeks ago. On Friday, she bumped my dose from 10mg to 20mg. Since yesterday morning I've had bad general anxiety for no apparent reason. A quick search of the interwebs tells me that increased anxiety can be pretty common side effect when starting Lexapro. Has anyone else had this issue?

I spoke to my doctor today and she lowered my dose to 15mg. Hopefully, that'll help a little bit. I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder and OCD 20 years ago. I was on Celexa for about 10 years before I switched to Zoloft and I don't remember having any of these side effects with it. I'm no scientist but medication for anxiety having the side effect of causing more anxiety seems sort of stupid, no?

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Wed Mar 19, 2014 3:22 pm 
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More a stressed out thing rather than anxiety but my colleagues anxieties really stressed me out yesterday but it didn't hit me until late yesterday evening and today. They were all in a flap about something that happened and the more their anxiety levels were going up the less rational and productive they were. I ended up having to step in and do some of the stuff they should have been doing then didn't even get thanked for it by them. Granted the doctor did acknowledge the help I gave and also gave me a look as if to say why are they all in meltdown mode.

But yeah, even though I was calm and collected during the whole situation I've had a headache since which is making me grumpy and not in the mood for too much talking but my manager wants to do nothing but talk right now and I just need some damn headspace!!!!

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Thu Mar 20, 2014 7:45 am 
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So, do any of you have any experience with single time use medicine for panic attacks? I used to suffer from anxiety, but it hasn't really been an issue for years (thanks to copious amounts of therapy) but I never took any medication. However, I am suffering from a serious amount of anxiety when it comes to flying. You know the deal; I hyper ventilate, sometimes throw up, I feel tingling and like I can't breath, my heart rate gets out of control. And I need to fly to England in a month. I can't (and don't want to!) avoid flying - I want to travel and see the world.
So i've called up my doctor and have an appointment next monday to talk about her prescribing some medicine for my flights. I have no idea what kind of medicine that exists that prevents full blown panic attacks, but I want to hear your experiences.. What do you take? Does it make you stoned? Relaxed? What can I expect?

I am going to ask her to prescribe enough so that I can take a pill at home just to try it out without being in a plane. Because there is no way in hell I am taking medicine that makes my brain goofy while on a plane without knowing what to expect!


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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Thu Mar 20, 2014 8:15 am 
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I have lorazepam (a benzodiazepine) for that purpose, smoothie. It does dull the senses, and makes you feel like you're in a dream, but it slows down the freight train of physiological anxiety. I think it's a pretty common one prescribed for that purpose, so look into that!

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Did you notice the slight feeling of panic at the words "Chicken Basin Street"? Like someone was walking over your grave? Try not to remember. We must never remember. - mumbles
Is this about devilberries and nazifruit again? - footface


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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Thu Mar 20, 2014 8:47 am 
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I used to take Xanax for panic attacks, smoothie. It just chilled me out, didn't make me goofy or stoned, really. I mean, I wouldn't drive on one, but I think I could definitely function in an airport with one in my system. Taking one at home seems like a good idea, but if you're not actively panicking, then it might have a different effect on you.

I am having pretty severe anxiety this week. I know it's because it's spring break and I'm working less. Up til today I've managed to keep myself fairly busy and even relaxed for awhile yesterday, which is unheard of for me in the afternoon in the middle of the frigging week. But it started up last night and today is pretty yucky. I'm worried about this show that's supposed to be installed, but the artist hasn't gotten ahold of me, so I don't know when he's planning on going to the gallery, and I only have his email, not his phone number. I've already emailed him asking him to call or text me when he's going to install, and he emailed back that it would be today or tomorrow, but I still don't have any actual confirmation from him. And I don't want to blow up his email bugging him about it when I know he's trying to finish everything anyway. Blah. And, as is my usual pattern when I'm feeling anxious, I'm channeling a lot of anxiety into my relationship when it's totally unnecessary. Nothing has changed between us, and things are going well, but I've convinced myself that something is horribly wrong and that T doesn't love me anymore or that he's being unfaithful or that he doesn't want to have a future with me. None of this is because of anything that he's done or said. I apparently just need something to freak out about, and my old trust issues are rearing their head because my friend got cheated on by her boyfriend and some employee of T's got cheated on by her boyfriend recently. Get it together, self! Everything is fine! Oh, also, money. Gah, I hate (needing) money so much.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Thu Mar 20, 2014 8:59 am 
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Well, the artist just texted me and we're meeting today, so at least that's sorted. I actually feel less anxious now. Amazing.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Thu Mar 20, 2014 2:20 pm 
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smoothie, getting a test pill should help to see how it will effect you so that is a great idea and you will know how you will be before you have to go on the flight. I was given a low enough dose of an anxiolytic before but for back pain. The doctor had told me that I would more than likely spend the whole time sleeping but it actually only made me feel giggly and a bit spaced out. The doctor will recommend which one will be best for you because the effects of each one last for different lengths of time and in strength.

Some people are still in a tizzy since Tuesday at work. I had to listen to two of them again today. So yay I'm still all stressy and it's starting to trigger anxiety now.

Also, my manager keeps asking me to type up emails for her. Despite me telling her numerous times that I have difficulty with typing when someone is talking to me and that I need to see it in writing she still insists on verbalising it to me. Worst part is she takes FOREVER to decide what she is going to say and then most of the time doesn't have the correct information she needs to send to hand. I know it sounds bizarre but this type of a situation really plays on my anxiety levels. I can't even write out something as someone is verbalising it to me. It's like my brain completely can't translate it and I can't cope with trying to remember more than 2 words at a time. If it was written out for me I could read it and remember the whole thing but I have major difficulty with following verbal command when typing/writing. I can't quite explain it but it is like my head gets full of noise and I am trying to translate chinese.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Thu Mar 20, 2014 3:12 pm 
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I've been tapering off citalopram and I'm getting freaky panic attacks. Like I wake up in the middle of a panic attack. Or I start panicking when I get out of breath from exercising. Grrr I hope this doesnt last long.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Thu Mar 20, 2014 3:31 pm 
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After a few weeks it should calm down. I didn't start having panic attacks after mirtazpine discontinuing until after the 3 week period which is usually more of a sign of relapse rather than withdrawal. They calmed down then after I increased my exercise, used a relaxation audiobook twice a day, done some yoga and took it easy for a while. It did help immensely that I had been seeing my counsellor every week and she reassured me that I was actually doing well.

Oh.... what also helped was looking at what evidence there was that I was still doing ok and managing. When I refocused myself on evidence of wellness rather than evidence of illness I started to chill out a bit.

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 Post subject: Re: the ANXIETY thread
PostPosted: Sun Mar 23, 2014 11:47 am 
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I can't continue to be in denial about anxiety anymore and am wondering if its worth it to get some meds or try and find some homeopathic remedies or just hang in there or what.

Its work, of course. I am in a mid-management position and trying to work towards the next step so I feel like part of the problem is I need to suck it up to prove I can be upper management (which is male-dominated, BTW, and so doesn't help that stress - I feel like males are much more of the suck it up variety.)

I just haven't slept through the night in a month and feel like there is no end in sight for the stress and long hours. My counterpart in CA is leaving, so I think this means more travel for me, and that is anxiety-provoking. A snippet of the thoughts that race through my head every night: On Monday Mar 31 I am seriously supposed to be in 3 meetings at the same time but in reality will have to ditch them all to get on a plane to CA to train with the person who is leaving. One of the 3 meetings requires local travel and is "mandatory" and oh, I will have no time to prepare whatever the hell it is I am supposed to present at this meeting because this week is such a shiitake show. Another meeting is one I run! And how I know my anxiety is out of control is because I am fixated on the fact that I have to drive to my airport, fly to CA, rent a car, and drive for a week out there. It sounds so dumb and I know it sounds dumb but I hate parking garages (I will park in the middle of the sun to avoid a parking garage) and driving unfamiliar cars in unfamiliar places. I feel like when I have anxiety episodes I have a touch of agoraphobia or something, and so at other times this might be no big deal but right now, this is what I'm choosing to fixate upon and obsess about and I'm dreading it. Arggh.


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