| Register  | FAQ  | Search | Login 
It is currently Mon Dec 22, 2014 7:58 am

All times are UTC - 6 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 42 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2
Author Message
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Thu Nov 14, 2013 6:28 pm 
Offline
Bought a used copy of Natural Harvest
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:29 pm
Posts: 6244
Location: Land of Maple and Beavers
I've discovered one of my favourites snacks, dates and peanut butter, fork up my guts so badly and make me someone you do NOT want to be in the same room as.

Guess who just ate some anyway?

_________________
Did you notice the slight feeling of panic at the words "Chicken Basin Street"? Like someone was walking over your grave? Try not to remember. We must never remember. - mumbles
Is this about devilberries and nazifruit again? - footface


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Fri Nov 15, 2013 4:48 am 
Offline
Ninja Master
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 5:00 pm
Posts: 4652
Location: Surrey, UK
My workmate was telling me that she woke up in the night the other day and could smell shiitake, really strong. She searched the entire house to see if the dog had taken a crepe in a corner somewhere but it was nowhere to be found. The dog just has really really bad and strong farts apparently! I laughed so much.

_________________
I sure do love pumpkins, Cotton.

Make up blog: http://love-lipstick.blogspot.com
Food blog: http://alienontoast.blogspot.com
FB Page for both blogs: http://www.facebook.com/lipstickontoast


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Sun Dec 01, 2013 12:39 am 
Offline
Semen Strong
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 7:10 pm
Posts: 19338
Location: Cliffbar NJ
Anyone want fart filtering undies? http://myshreddies.com/

_________________
My oven is bigger on the inside, and it produces lots of wibbly wobbly, cake wakey... stuff. - The PoopieB.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Sun Jan 12, 2014 10:31 am 
Offline
Dying from Nooch Lung
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 1:50 pm
Posts: 3315
Location: The Bene
Oh man. The other day, I had leftover chili for lunch and then brussels sprouts with dinner. The farting was out of control both in terms of smell and frequency. Usually my partner complains about the smell, but now even I couldn't stand the smell of myself. And it wasn't just when I farted. The fart smell hung around me like Pigpen's cloud all night. When I dropped my pants to pee, a smell reminiscent of a natural gas refinery drifted up from them, even though it had been at least ten minutes since I'd let one rip. 'Twas epic.

_________________
Ain't no guarantees in life, and nothing that comes out of my vagina can change that. - Erika Soyf*cker

I'd rather have a cupcake and a matte stomach. - Desdemona


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Wed Jan 22, 2014 4:37 pm 
Offline
Bought a used copy of Natural Harvest
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:29 pm
Posts: 6244
Location: Land of Maple and Beavers
Oh my. I had one of those days yesterday, lepelaar. The thing is I'm currently working in VERY close quarters with 3 other people. I kept letting them go all day because they were just building up inside me and I HAD to! Two of them left to go for a meeting and when they came back, one exclaimed, "UGH, it smells like a yogurt factory in here!" I am still laughing about that. I was so close to tell them it was me but then I realized I don't really know them that well yet.

_________________
Did you notice the slight feeling of panic at the words "Chicken Basin Street"? Like someone was walking over your grave? Try not to remember. We must never remember. - mumbles
Is this about devilberries and nazifruit again? - footface


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Wed Jan 22, 2014 5:07 pm 
Offline
The Real Hamburger Helper
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2011 8:03 pm
Posts: 2330
Location: I can't believe it's not England!
I have been eating a lot of animal cookies, pretzel chips and graham crackers recemtly and my gas has been awful!

_________________
"Vegan to me means Oreos for breakfast." -Poopiebitch
"tl;dr: I quit working to drink beer paid for with gift cards" erikasoyf*cker


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Thu Jan 30, 2014 1:37 pm 
Offline
Tofu Pup

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 7:55 am
Posts: 13
You can add my name to the recently-suffering-from-atomic-deathfarts club. I'm not sure what it was exactly that set me off, but this past Sunday I was producing gas that, on a stinkiness scale of 1-10, was roughly a 17. The stench wasn't merely unpleasant, it was literally painful to inhale. My roommate (who is also my best friend) has plenty of experience with my putrid farts and has built up something of a tolerance, but these put even her over the edge and ruined our attempt to catch up on Downton Abbey together. We went from sitting together on one couch, to sitting on opposite ends of the couch with her pulling her shirt over her nose, to sitting on opposite ends of the living room, to sitting on opposite ends of a freezing living room with the windows wide open and two fans running, to her retreating to safety and fresh air in her bedroom. Even leaving the room to let them out did no good because I had the same "Pigpen's cloud" effect that lepelaar mentioned. All I can say is that I'm thankful things subsided back to my regular smelly-but-safe-for-human-life gas by Monday because otherwise I would have had to explain to my boss that she would have to either do without me for the day or risk the office being declared a toxic biohazard.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Wed Mar 19, 2014 7:40 am 
Offline
The Real Hamburger Helper
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2011 8:03 pm
Posts: 2330
Location: I can't believe it's not England!
I occasionally have to work in a location where there are a lot of construction tech people gathered in the morning for my company and had gas. I didn't think it was stinky but APPARENTLY it was because they all started blaming each other for the fart smell. I almost snickered to myself but also felt bad. Thankfully they've almost all left so I don't have to try and escape outside to be gassy nearly as much.

_________________
"Vegan to me means Oreos for breakfast." -Poopiebitch
"tl;dr: I quit working to drink beer paid for with gift cards" erikasoyf*cker


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Wed Mar 19, 2014 11:55 am 
Offline
Not NOT A Furry
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:11 pm
Posts: 524
If I'm at a show or something I like to sidle up to a bigger guy, fart, and watch the people around us blame him. :/

_________________
I obliged the shiitake out of her!
- lixa
I miss my bag o' dicks
-alice1drland


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Sun Nov 02, 2014 3:19 am 
Offline
Top of the food chain & doesn't need to prove it
User avatar

Joined: Wed Dec 29, 2010 3:46 pm
Posts: 641
Location: Anderson, South Carolina
Dude.. Just don't linger behind me when I'm on the treadmill. That's all I'm saying. Ok, mine aren't that stinky. That being said: They are near constant due to the intestinal jostling, and the sheer volume of gas has to amount to some odor.

Alas.. Despite proudly wearing vegan t-shirts, I still get people who think it's a good idea to have hour long conversations RIGHT behind me. I may have to get some sort of "I'm vegan and I'm VERY flatulent on the treadmill" shirt.

_________________
Well hello mister fancy scrubs!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Sun Nov 02, 2014 4:46 am 
Offline
Seagull of the PPK
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:46 pm
Posts: 8516
Location: Brasil
the cockatiel audibly farted the other day. i don't know why it's so surprising, considering that the dog does it all the time, and I have seen everything from horses to snakes fart like crazy, but i just never really considered that birds fart.

_________________
Buddha says 'Meh'.--matwinser
I'm just a drunk who likes fruit. -- Desdemona


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Sun Nov 02, 2014 5:24 am 
Offline
Impressive boner
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 2:57 pm
Posts: 4183
Location: Nottingham.
Whoa... snakes fart?


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Sun Nov 02, 2014 5:34 am 
Offline
Seagull of the PPK
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:46 pm
Posts: 8516
Location: Brasil
oh yeah! well, they gulp their food, right? (my brother used to gulp air for this very purpose)

_________________
Buddha says 'Meh'.--matwinser
I'm just a drunk who likes fruit. -- Desdemona


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Sun Nov 02, 2014 9:30 pm 
Offline
Drinks Wild Tofurkey
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 4:12 pm
Posts: 2773
Location: MKE
Lately, luckily only at home, whenever I sneeze or cough, I also fart. Tonight my husband started calling me Miss Fartsalot. And we both snicker like small children.

_________________
"I think I am going to turn into a chickpea." ~Dakini
Love is like a pineapple, sweet and undefinable ~ Piet Hein


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Sun Nov 02, 2014 10:08 pm 
Offline
Queen Bitch of Self-Righteous Veganville
User avatar

Joined: Sun Sep 05, 2010 2:21 pm
Posts: 10879
Location: Illinoize
HappyAsh wrote:
Dude.. Just don't linger behind me when I'm on the treadmill. That's all I'm saying. Ok, mine aren't that stinky. That being said: They are near constant due to the intestinal jostling, and the sheer volume of gas has to amount to some odor.

Alas.. Despite proudly wearing vegan t-shirts, I still get people who think it's a good idea to have hour long conversations RIGHT behind me. I may have to get some sort of "I'm vegan and I'm VERY flatulent on the treadmill" shirt.


I have this problem, luckily i'm right up against the track so no one stands there, but I feel bad that people have to walk through my fart cloud. I just turn the fan on and point it downward to help blow the smell out faster. The other night, I let out an unexpected and LOUD fart but luckily no one was behind me and the only other two people on machines were wearing headphones.

_________________
"The Tree is His Penis"

The tree is his penis // it's very exciting // when held up to his mouth // the lights are all lighting // his eyes start a-bulging // in unbridled glee // the tree is his penis // its beauty, effulgent -amandabear


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Sun Nov 02, 2014 11:50 pm 
Offline
Tofu Pup
User avatar

Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2014 9:03 pm
Posts: 11
Location: San Diego
8ball wrote:
Whoa... snakes fart?


It makes total sense...but just the idea of a snake farting is so bizarre, so foreign, and something I've never considered before, that I couldn't help but sit and contemplate the strangeness of it all for some time.

Just to confirm...here's a video of a snake farting in a sink. Life will never be the same.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AGuvQPInjmw


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Fart Thread
PostPosted: Mon Nov 03, 2014 1:18 am 
Offline
Hoards Peppermint Jo-Jos
User avatar

Joined: Thu May 12, 2011 4:38 pm
Posts: 790
Location: Germany
If you're looking for a quick, easy lunch, don't just steam a mountain of broccoli. Not even if you're home alone.

_________________
"None of your fancy dandyisms please!" - interrobang?!

blog: Jaunty Dame


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 42 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2

All times are UTC - 6 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group
Template made by DEVPPL/ThatBigForum and fancied up by What Cheer