Post Punk Kitchen Forum

We both felt hard-done by as we didn't do anything last night (too much starchy food led to excessive sleepiness), so we made up for it this morning. Best EVER.

Hooray 8ball! Nice streak!

Thanks Mars. I don't think I've ever been so active in this thread before now.

It must be your impressive boner.

Made plans with Big Pimpin' crush to go to his house after I get off work Wed (10pm)! They are overnight plans. Last time we hung out there was all this talk of what he wants to do to me. Lard I don't know if I can handle the wait with all the anticipation! Let's just say there are things planned to happen that are things I will be able to cross off my 'I have never done' list! *Shivers*

Ooh la la, Mars! Excited and jealous for you.

So, I'm dating someone new and we recently...ahem...took things to a physical level. I'm kind of disappointed. This guy is perfect for me in so many ways, treats me with respect, is romantic and thoughtful. However, the sex was just so dissatisfying but cuddle times afterwards is brilliant. My two last boyfriends were older than me by quite a few years (12 years +) and I've been spoiled in that department by their having more experience. I'm now dating someone my own age (early twenties). I'm just not sure how to communicate what I want. Should I just show him through my actions in bed or have a conversation with him?

I think saying what you want while in bed with someone is never a bad thing.

I think talking about what you want and asking what they want can be really hot too. Do it in low quieted voices while making out. It's fun times.

Plus, if someone is otherwise really really great, give it a little time in the sex department. Sometimes things can just be a little off, you haven't learn how to read each other of communicate those things, etc. If they realllllly don't get better then re-evaluate, but if its just the first few times, don't worry about it, I say.

To be fair, we've only done it once. Sexy times potentially at my place this Thursday! We'll probably be less nervous this time round so we'll see. I also have to stop comparing him to past partners! During cuddles I was thinking "Well that's not anything like how *insert name of the jerk who broke my heart but I was sexually on the same page with* would do it. Not fair, not fair at all.

I think mostly you can't get upset if someone isn't doing what you want if you're not asking them to do what you want. People can't read minds and are into all sorts of different things.

SOOOOO I've got that sex-date tonight and though in many ways I feel much better from my cold I still have a cough. I"M ANNOYED. Also, I've warned him a bunch about my contagion level but he's insistent that it happen regardless, something about a killer immune system and him not caring. STILL, argh.

Whelllllll I took some medicine and it helped with the above post!

Date went reeeeeal well. Dude is forking cute as hell and into me, which is awesome. I even stayed the night which I feel like is super rare for me. We cuddled and spooned lots. And he made coffee in the morning, it was really yum.

I can definitely check a couple things off my 'I've never' list! And dude has pretty big hands, so, feel like a champ right here. ;)

I am SO looking forward to tomorrow night!

I wonder if we're annoying the neighbors yet. Ha!

So.....I've never posted in this thread before because I had a kind of boring, not so great sex life. Maybe I should have because I've now just been dumped from an eleven and a half year relationship (age 21-33). I lived with my boyfriend/partner (I'm a female) for that entire time and haven't even really even looked at another dude during that whole time (and didn't have very much experience before that). Yeah, big bummer, I'm super depressed about it and all that. But....the weirdest thing happened. I want sex again, a lot, with him. I basically forgot what it felt like to be turned on and had no sex drive for at least a couple years. I didn't think I'd ever feel like this again. And I can't understand why this is happening or what I should do. We're still sleeping together and it's way better than it has been in years, maybe ever for me, honestly, and I still want him back. I'm wondering if anything like this has ever happened to anyone here, whether I am going to lose my mind if I keep sleeping with him, and any other insight any of you might have. I also might post again with other questions if we don't get back together because I am terrified of being with another person.

Ha! Same here. I've never been a loud person but something with this guy makes me really cry out. He was worried about my neighbors the other night, so I'll try to control it when we are at my place and relax at his, since he has no neighbors. But still, it's amazing, every time it seems to get better, how can that be?

The sex with my ex was improved greatly by breaking up. I mean, there was some good stuff before the break up, but we really figured out how to make it stellar afterward.

I'm however, even more pleased with sex with my gf now. We don't even have to break up to make it awesomest!

It can, however, complicate actually really moving on. Its true that i was probably more stuck on my ex when we were still sleeping together and didn't really get over her til I got super smitten with my gf. So, the continued sexy-oxytocin bonding will make it harder to split. Then again, not being completely over my ex meant that I didn't fall too fast with my gf, so maybe it was ok. But it will definitely make it take longer to get over, but maybe less painful in the long run? Or just putting off the pain. Or will reignite what you had.

Its hard to say, but break up sex is good, so thats all I know.

I think continuing sex after a break up makes it way harder to move on. Also I think by the sounds of it you are experiencing better sex now so you think you shouldn't give it up... but you also imply that you are not very sexually experienced with others before him. So for all you know there could be way better. From my experience breaking up with my ex of almost 7 years... you have to get yourself out there for other people. I learned so much about myself and my body since. Not all sexual encounters were that great, but some were mind-blowing, it's worth it. Get to know yourself as the common denominator in sex and not your partner.

Lycophyte and Mars have good advice. I had to stop talking to my ex to move on, I can't imagine sex after. And I'm certainly not the most experienced in number of partners and difference but I have to say what I thought was good really wasn't in comparison.

I couldn't personally do the post-break up sex thing since, for me, sex and emotion are too tangled up. From your post, ilovemountains, it sounds so much like he's using you. You say "I've been dumped" and "I still want him back" and that just sounds like such an imbalance of power... he can keep having sex with you because you're willing, but you're having sex with him because you're hoping he'll take you back. Maybe I'm misinterpreting, but it just sounds like a recipe for a lot of hurt and heartbreak. If it's really just good sex that you want, find someone you can have it with where you're both on the same page about what it means.

Some amazing sexytimes again last night with Big Pimpin Crush. Jeeeeesh him and I are so sexually compatible. GOOD LARD PEOPLE.

This is all very smart and true, in my experience.

The sex with this man I've recently been sleeping with is SO AMAZING.

Just had to get that out there.

My long term escort and caretaker is perfect. He just fits perfectly and rubs me in all the right ways. Unfortunately he works too much at a stupid job on top of going to school, so it's like we have to make time to get intimate.
I miss the good old days when he lived at home in his basement, and we would just lay in bed all day and snuggle and do our thing.