Post Punk Kitchen Forum

Something must have happened to my internal electrical circuitry and I'm in that awkward stage of just figuring out what the heck is going on. Like when Spiderman first realized he could, like, stick to walls. I'm waiting for something awesome to become of my own personal superhero journey, but in the meantime, here is my evidence:

- Twice in the past month, the furnace has shorted out in my apartment.
- Lately, my headphones have been shocking the insides of my ears. (This one actually freaks me out.)
- Exorbitant and unexplainably high electricity bill.
- Just last night, 4 (!) electrical incidents in my apartment!
a) computer cord shorted out
b) stove stopped working, even though the clock on it is still working
c) furnace shorted out again
d) I knocked over my bedside lamp and the lightbulb exploded (maybe not technically an electrical incident, but I'm counting it)

What do you guys think my superpowers are going to be? Should I use my powers for good or evil? (I'm leaning towards good, but the right argument could set me crooked.) Discuss.

Jubilee, is that you?!

Ugh, Jubilee is lame. I want to be a more awesome superhero/mutant.

No, you're a new one! Maybe you'll learn to control electricity? You can take electricity away from big power plants and slaughterhouses and give it to people who can't afford the bills. You're going to be the PPK's favorite superhero when the apocalypse comes and there's an energy crisis.

Jack up the electrical bills of people you hate by hanging out outside their houses.

Shut down businesses you don't like by standing near their critical equipment.

Offer these services for a fee to others, to help make some money to offset your own unfortunate electrical bills and appliance repair costs.

my headphones shock me sometimes. can i be your sidekick?

DIBS ON THE FILM RIGHTS.

I predict the superpower of getting your landlord in trouble for not hiring a certified electrician. Don't underestimate that power. It's kind of awesome.

This, for sure.


Seriously though, get your landlord to have an electrician in, it could be dangerous.

While I'm totally excited for you to have new superpowers, I would also definitely recommend an electrician. These things are serious! Your place could catch on firre! Not joking! My partner's an electrician, and he goes crazy hearing about the shoddy jobs some people do to avoid hiring a professional.

Maybe you could team up with my mom. I'm pretty sure she has some kind of weird electrical superpower. She used to work in a hospital and all of the monitors and alarms would go off every time she walked by them. She also used to have a problem with all of her credit cards becoming demagnetized, no matter how she stored them.

I got two electric shocks on the butt from my phone charger this evening! My husband insists it shouldn't be possible but my butt says otherwise!

I used to work with a guy who ruined watches, demagnetized credit cards and crashed computers. It was either a streak of bad luck or a really sucky superpower.

All those applying for my sidekick...I don't know. But I will be accepting applications for minions. I would love to have minions a la despicable me. And the furnace stuff turned out that they had the wrong type of fuses in the basement, and changed them, so hopefully it won't happen again and maybe that way why my bill was so high? That doesn't fix my sad laptop battery, though. Good thing I'm still under warranty for this thing.

You should tell your landlord that, since it's likely the fuse problem that upped your electric bill, could you get a little knocked off the rent?

They might laugh but it never hurts to ask...also, if they didn't do the wiring according to law, they might be perfectly willing to reimburse the overage on the electric bill.

My boring superpower: urging strangers on the internet to save themselves money.

I like what tingleplants! had to say. (Also, asking never hurts? They might say yes -- and if they say no, you're no worse off than you are right now.)

I'm currently waiting for an adjusted bill to be sent to me from the electric company, when I do, and have a new total (it's still going to be ridiculous, but not $100/12 days ridiculous), I will call the property manager. Never hurts to ask, right? Tell you what, my superhero power is most definitely not talking to strangers and asking favors, though. It actually might be my kryptonite.

I would like to apply for the minion position. I have been working on my evil laugh...

I do hope your electrical problems are found and fixed soon though!

I ruin watches. Or at least I used to, I quit wearing them out of annoyance. My powers started early in life, though. Do you guys remember the Mickey Mouse watches from the 90's that played music? My grandma got me the one that plays one song, It's a Small World. Well, I wore the watch and it quit working after a month or two. I assumed the battery was dead, so I put it on the shelf. A few months later I took it down to get the battery replaced and it ran, only it had started playing London Bridge. Freaky. There was no internetz back then for me to ask about this, so I think I'm off to google this phenomenon now, nearly two decades later.

Anyway, I could make your foes late and destroy their cheesy music boxes?

Now that you mention it, my debit card only works about half the time, too...

I frequently burn through earbuds. I find often near the end of their lifespan they start to shock me. I think it is how they tell me they hate me for the damage my constant dashing around with them on causes.

Also maybe your home is having an electrical problem.

Depending on renting laws where you are, it might not even be asking a "favor"...the bill might be proof enough that your landlord owes you reimbursement. That still requires confronting people, though, and that sucks. It's not my superpower either. My secondary superpower is advising people to do things that I have trouble doing myself. I think the title of that is Overbearing Relative.

Ah yes. My secondary superpower is Backseat Driver.

Also, more proof! My car battery died this morning! (That was a long, cold walk to work.)

Only if I can do the soundtrack!