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 Post subject: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 11:30 am 
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I do not know of any advice columns that address the types of friendship/life/daily situations I have questions for! Are you in the same boat? Or are you someone that can help? Then let us form a Ask-PPK thread here and find answers to our problems!


My most pressing question:
I was at an event over the weekend and my boyfriend picked up Mexican food that would have been so dope with a beer (I do not even drink beer but the liqueur store had pumpkin beer & my curiosity has been on alert for it). For the most part everyone was vegan...we all had the same take out food, problem was I think my boyfriend and I were the only non strait edge people there! Instead of beer I got water. I really wanted a sip of beer...Did I do the right thing?

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 11:36 am 
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Was the party being hosted as Straight Edge? Like on the invite or anything was it mentioned, or were you just aware of the fact that lots of people there were straight edge?

I don't think they would have been bothered by other in the room drinking unless they specifically asked for there to be no drinks at the party. But you probably did the correct and respectful thing.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 11:43 am 
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I think you did the right thing. I am certainly not straight edge, but if the majority of people were I would have gone with the majority opinion and abstained.

But you really should try some pumpkin ale... it can be heaven.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 12:09 pm 
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GraciaKai wrote:
Was the party being hosted as Straight Edge? Like on the invite or anything was it mentioned, or were you just aware of the fact that lots of people there were straight edge?


not a sxe event - it was ladyfest!

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 12:18 pm 
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missmuffcake wrote:
GraciaKai wrote:
Was the party being hosted as Straight Edge? Like on the invite or anything was it mentioned, or were you just aware of the fact that lots of people there were straight edge?


not a sxe event - it was ladyfest!

Gotcha, it sounds like you did the safe and respectful thing all in all. But you probably would have been fine either way. Philly has a great Unitarian church that rents out their basement to one of the concert promoters in town and it's BYO so long as nothing is in glass. There is always a big mix of straight edge people and drinkers in the crowd. No one seems to mind either way. And most of the shows there are punk & hardcore.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 12:27 pm 
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Is there a reason you can't ask this stuff in the 'random things' thread, or any of the other catch-all threads? Because we have a lot of catch-all threads.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 2:10 pm 
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mrsbadmouth wrote:
Is there a reason you can't ask this stuff in the 'random things' thread, or any of the other catch-all threads? Because we have a lot of catch-all threads.



I was thinking this could be an open advice thread for everyone, a lot of things that have come up lately could go in this thread. I feel that the random thread - things get lost with random thoughts. Questions get ignored.

Close it down if you feel the need to.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 2:16 pm 
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I like the idea of this thread. I hope it remains.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 4:57 pm 
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I didn't say anything about closing it.

Here's the problem with catch-all threads, and this is more of a poster perspective than it is a mod one. When I am busy or tired and I look at the PPK, the very last threads that catch my eye are enormous threads that are vague. If someone had a parent or spouse die, or if they get in an accident or find out they have cancer, I would actually prefer that they make their own thread about it so the title will catch my eye. There's no rule that says you can't make a personal thread whenever something happens in your life. If you stub your toe it obviously doesn't need a thread, but if you get married or have a baby I would love to congratulate you.

Some threads are catch all but for specific subjects, like the makeup thread or the general pet thread. I know that if I click on those I will be reading about that specific subject. But that also doesn't mean that someone can't start a new thread to talk about their newly adopted animal or to ask about the best eyeliner.

We don't have a maximum number of allowed threads, so there's no reason why we have to condense so many subjects into catch all threads that are huge. And I agree that things get lost and questions get ignored - which is part of the problem.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 6:17 pm 
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I totally agree with mbm. Not from a modding perspective, just from a reading the PPK perspective. Stuff gets lost in those threads so easily so if it's a major problem, make a new thread, but if it's a minor problem it can go into best or worst day or space to threads.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 6:46 pm 
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i would hope someone would post a new thread if they had a serious issue and needed support. i thought this would be the thread that you can ask day to day etiquette questions that might not be answered elsewhere on the web...the best/worst thing at least to me is a rant/rave and again i see questions get buried because people are just posting randomly.


here is another one of my etiquette questions i am pondering & would love answers to: you meet someone cool, how long do you wait till you request them as a friend on social media without coming off too 'needy'?

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 6:50 pm 
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I usually wait a day or two, but I think people are pretty ok with whenever, usually?

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 6:51 pm 
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I don't know the answer to that but when someone I've just recently met friends me on facebook I tend to think 'friendly' bdfore I think 'needy.' I get feeling self-conscious about it because I am shy about friending people, but I don't think you need to be worried about it.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 8:13 pm 
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i've just straight out told them in person "i'm gonna send you a friend request" (but that might be a special situation, because i already knew they had FBs, and was at an event that was organized on FB.)

if it was someone i hadn't previously "seen around" on the old facebook streets, i might ask them if they even have a facebook, and then if they do, maybe ask them if they minded if i friend them.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 8:14 pm 
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Yeah, I just usually ask people while I'm hanging out with them, because I regularly spell names incorrectly.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 8:26 pm 
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Same. I'll usually ask if they are on FB and then ask if I can add. If they say yes, I usually do it pretty quickly. Mostly so that I don't forget.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 11:32 pm 
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yay - it's me again!

is it horrible to defriend a person on fb because she just posted that she cured her bleeding breast with raw fresh juice diet? this is after arguing with her about hemp oil being a cure for terminal cancer!

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 11:37 pm 
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Imagine there's no facebook...it's easy if you try!

So, if you had encountered this friend through established social means and had a conversation, where would the convo go? Would you unfriend her IRL? Use these thoughts to guide your actions.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 11:42 pm 
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i would be in jail for punching her!

seriously though, my threshold for snake oil cures, raw juice cures and wheat grass are being tested.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2014 8:43 am 
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Just thinking that this last problem would have fitted just fine into the FB awkwardness thread...

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2014 11:20 am 
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Well, I would never have written "imagine there's no facebook" in the FB thread.

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2014 11:25 am 
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yeah I'm also for less of these catch-all threads. We have so many! I don't have time to read them all and sift through all the random things that get posted in them, so I miss out on a lot.

pet peeves, pet awesomes, worst thing, best thing, space to post things that don't go anywhere else, first world problems, relationship advice, facebook....I think that about covers the gamut, and what doesn't fit in there can have it's very own thread!

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2014 11:30 am 
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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2014 11:38 am 
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paprikapapaya wrote:
yeah I'm also for less of these catch-all threads. We have so many! I don't have time to read them all and sift through all the random things that get posted in them, so I miss out on a lot.

pet peeves, pet awesomes, worst thing, best thing, space to post things that don't go anywhere else, first world problems, relationship advice, facebook....I think that about covers the gamut, and what doesn't fit in there can have it's very own thread!


Start a thread about this?

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 Post subject: Re: Ask Auntie PPK - Daily Problems & Such
PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2014 12:17 pm 
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Absolutely, or put into one of the many existing threads it could fit into.

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