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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2014 4:12 pm 
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Heeeerrrrree's JACKY!
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Bossman suggested I just leave it. So that is what I am doing. It smells more like mildew than anything. And she has left us her old food and clothing before. So I doubt it is anything to awful. But my gosh it stinks. It is back in the kitchen and I am two rooms away. I can smell it.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2014 5:02 pm 
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Oh, gosh. I would open it and then immediately regret it. But I don't think I could stand not knowing!


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2014 5:15 pm 
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kfad wrote:
Bossman suggested I just leave it. So that is what I am doing. It smells more like mildew than anything. And she has left us her old food and clothing before. So I doubt it is anything to awful. But my gosh it stinks. It is back in the kitchen and I am two rooms away. I can smell it.

Yikes :( Now if you do find out what's in it, you must tell us!


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 6:31 pm 
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Dying from Nooch Lung
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Animal control picked up an elderly dog who had wandered off her property. The dog's person called, and he said he leaves the dog outside all day because she's a Sagittarius. If he leaves her in the house alone, she barks and pees everywhere. She doesn't have separation anxiety. It's because she's a sagittarius. She's only skinny because it's the winter and she gets the blues in the winter. In the spring, he will run her 2 miles every morning and that will make her gain weight. She isn't on heartworm preventative because she's never gotten heartworm before, so obviously she's not going to get it. There are no coyotes on his property because he (yes, the human) urinates all around his property, and that scares them away. Did he mention that his dog is a sagittarius?


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 6:35 pm 
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smdh

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 7:11 pm 
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OH MY. That guy sounds like a winner.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 7:40 pm 
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I am taking Amos to the vet tomorrow for his annual checkup, etc... I am going to preface my answers to all of the doctor's questions with, "Well, he's a Scorpio so..."

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 9:04 pm 
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I just googled to figure out what star sign my dog is. She's an aries.

(Seriously, though, that is a very worrisome situation and I hope both the dog and the human get whatever help they need.)


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 9:24 pm 
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Dying from Nooch Lung
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eatsbabies wrote:
I just googled to figure out what star sign my dog is. She's an aries.

Ha, I did too. Tegan is a Saggitarius, so I guess I have to stop leaving her in the house now!

The situation will be monitored to make sure the dog doesn't continue to lose weight and that medical care is given if needed. Nothing else we can do beyond watching to make sure it doesn't turn into a neglect case.


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 9:49 pm 
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I work at a garden store, and I had a customer the other day asking me about what will get rid of mites on his plants, and I asked what kind of plants he was growing and he said "Tomatoes", while making air quotes. This is somewhat common.


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 11:46 pm 
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What I wanna know is why this time of year someone is growing toma… oh wait.. oh okay, got it.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 2:55 am 
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I'm naïve. Until I read Mars' comment I thought you were posting because of the customer's odd and unnecessary use of quotes.


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 7:46 am 
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so that's what portland is really like, eh?

my dog is a Taurus. I suppose this explains why he has never learned to just stay low and insists on squirming on his back when i give him the hand command.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 1:43 pm 
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I received a call at work today, the guy said "is this a non-emergency line"
I said "yes"
He then said "Oh good, I'm just calling to report a fire"

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 2:29 pm 
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Maybe it was a very small fire?

Bossman: when so and so comes in with money... be careful. Sometimes the money is dirty.

I don't know what that means.

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Don't mind my breasts and vagina, I'm a gay man.---Idatetatooedguys.

"Tots: the universal food band-aid... better than a mother's kiss. Healin' wounds since 1954." Meggs


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 2:33 pm 
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kfad wrote:
Maybe it was a very small fire?



I transferred him to Command & Control on an emergency line, it turned out to be a large out of control garden fire

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 3:23 pm 
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kfad wrote:
Bossman: when so and so comes in with money... be careful. Sometimes the money is dirty.

I don't know what that means.

considering the stories you tell about your workplace, i would assume that it might have something to do with body cavities. i would start keeping rubber gloves in my drawer.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 3:25 pm 
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sisterlegume wrote:
I work at a garden store, and I had a customer the other day asking me about what will get rid of mites on his plants, and I asked what kind of plants he was growing and he said "Tomatoes", while making air quotes. This is somewhat common.


This is hilarious!

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Too much woo, you guys. Too much woo ~Tofulish
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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 3:41 pm 
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GreenDuck wrote:
I'm naïve. Until I read Mars' comment I thought you were posting because of the customer's odd and unnecessary use of quotes.


I didn't get it until I read your comment, and even then I had to go back and forth re-reading the comments and going "huh???" for a few more minutes before it clicked.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 11:24 pm 
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You guys. I don't even know when my cats were born. How will I know what they want and need?


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2014 11:39 pm 
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May I suggest that you read Linda Goodman's books cover-to-cover. Surely if you take notes and are truly in tune with your cats' inner selves, you will be able to discern their sun signs.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Fri Apr 04, 2014 11:11 am 
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electric_claire wrote:
You guys. I don't even know when my cats were born. How will I know what they want and need?


Two words: pet psychic

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Fri Apr 04, 2014 11:12 am 
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Hmm, when I was in LA recently my friend was talking about wanting to become a pet psychic. Do you think she could do reading of my cats over the phone? Skype?


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Fri Apr 11, 2014 10:08 am 
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I work doing contract review, research, and some conveyancing for a law firm that represents a large home builder back in Canada. Part of my job for each deal is to draft correspondence that sets out the buyer's lawyer's responsibilities and our responsibilities (there's also a formal sales contract). In order for the keys to the home purchased to be released, our letter says (in bold, underlined text) that we need to get cash to close. If we don't get money, we won't release keys.

Yesterday, I had a deal scheduled to close (i.e. a home bought that was scheduled to be paid for and occupied). I emailed the lawyer first thing in the morning to see if everything was expected to go ahead on schedule. They told me they wouldn't have money until the following day. I reminded them of the condition that we wouldn't release keys until we got funds and asked if their client, the buyer, was aware of the delay, since even though it's their responsibility to make sure their client knows what's going on and isn't expecting to get keys to the house if that's not going to happen, I feel like it's just good manners for me to check about that. I got nothing back. I emailed three more times trying to figure out if they were aware of the situation. I had a Dr. appointment at the end of the afternoon, and after trying to get hold of these idiots all day, I went to my appointment and got out to find roughly 8,000 messages from the buyer's lawyer saying that we HAD TO release keys RIGHT NOW. I called him back, and he told me, straight up, that he didn't read our letter with the conditions of the sale, and that he expected me to TELL the homebuilder to release the keys. How in the fork did this crasshole pass law school? He clearly doesn't understand 1) how contracts work, and 2) the lawyer-client relationship. Now, I'm told that he isn't going to have money until Tuesday, 3 business days after he was supposed to, and I have the feeling that means my life is going to suck until Tuesday.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Fri Apr 11, 2014 10:41 am 
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The bike shop where I work is tiny and there are really only 3 full time employees. As such, we all do wrenching stuff and retail stuff. A guy came in yesterday looking for a bike for his wife (without her, if course. I hate that.) Anyhow, he's pretty clueless, which I don't mind -I actually like helping people learn about bikes. But he keeps saying shiitake like he can't trust his wife to test ride bikes, because she'll just choose something based on colors, not on how it rides. Like he's a big expert. Plus, he refuses to let me raise the seat, so he's riding around with his knees all bunched up. Whatever. So I spend like 40 minutes with the guy, who turns to them and says, "Well, you guys are the experts, if you were young to get a bike like this for your wife or girlfriend, dollar for dollar, what's the best value?" I literally walked out of the shop, because I didn't know if I was going to yell at this guy or laugh at him. As I was leaving my coworker (who did try to redirect the question to me) was telling the guy the exact thing that I had, oh and suggesting he bring his wife in for a test ride.
My other coworker did point out that in this case, the guy might have been taking his cues from the fact they were both wearing aprons when he came in and I was not, but, you know this never happens when the guys aren't wearing aprons (or when a less knowledgeable part time male person is working) so..... shiitake like this happens to me at least once a week.


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