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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Mon Aug 04, 2014 4:37 pm 
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Vegan Vegan Vegan Vegan Vegan
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is it possible it's actually sergio flores?


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Mon Aug 04, 2014 6:20 pm 
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acr and supercarrot, jinxies!

That would be amazing. I would WELCOME Sergio. This guy is no Sergio.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Mon Aug 04, 2014 6:43 pm 
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Nope, sorry, you're not walking in 25 minutes after we close and expecting people to miss buses home because you don't want to have to come back. And when I point you to our online system where you can do the whole process from your living room in your boxers, you are not going to rudely interrupt me to snark about why I won't just give you what you want since you're here (and, obviously, very special and important.) WE'RE CLOSED. Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Tue Aug 05, 2014 10:10 pm 
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Today was an extremely hectic day and there was probably a billion people in the store. A disabled customer with her dog stopped me and when I couldn't find the item she was looking for in the PDA, I told her I was going to just slip around the other side and quickly check where I think it may have been. While I was quickly searching through products, this woman comes up behind me and doesn't even try to get my attention, just says, "Where are your carpet cleaners?" I didn't have a walkie today because we don't have enough for everyone right now and I didn't know where they were off the top of my head since I don't work in that section. I explain to her that I wasn't sure but that I was currently in the middle of helping another customer and that I'd have to come back. She just barks at me, "Well do you know anyone that does know?!?!?! I've been walkin' around here for fifteen minutes and haven't found anyone!" I started panicking a bit at that moment because two other people came up to me and asked me for help at the same time as this and I really wanted to get back to my other customer so that she wasn't waiting forever, and there was no one else around to help me. I told her I couldn't call anyone right now but that I'd be right back. I went back to talk to the other original customer and the rude lady walked over while I was in the middle of speaking and said, "Mr. Shankly. Now I know. Now I can go complain about you." Then she walked straight over to one of the managers to complain about me. As soon as I was done with the original customer, another one stopped me. When I came back to the floor to give her the products, the rude lady was making fun of me with one of my co-workers, loud enough for me to hear and staring straight at me. That was on hour 8 of my 13 hour shift. Yay.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Tue Aug 05, 2014 10:56 pm 
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Lime and a Coconut
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what a butthole.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Tue Aug 05, 2014 11:30 pm 
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Wow I am so into that Sergio Flores video.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 7:59 am 
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how terrible shankly. heaven forbid you help someone who wasnt her! i wish i were the mouthy sassy person who could come up with something in that situation but i never can.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 8:10 am 
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A number listed as "private" called yesterday, and being that I feel like if you go to the trouble to block your number, I should go to the trouble of screening it, I let it ring and go to voicemail.

It was this dude who said his name and phone number, said he would like "one of the owners" (we only have one) to call him back because he would like to make a complaint. He said everything twice and hung up. I emailed the info to our COO and I am DYING to find out what the complaint was. I MUST KNOW IMMEDIATELY.


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 9:31 am 
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Hollie wrote:
A number listed as "private" called yesterday, and being that I feel like if you go to the trouble to block your number, I should go to the trouble of screening it, I let it ring and go to voicemail.

It was this dude who said his name and phone number, said he would like "one of the owners" (we only have one) to call him back because he would like to make a complaint. He said everything twice and hung up. I emailed the info to our COO and I am DYING to find out what the complaint was. I MUST KNOW IMMEDIATELY.


"I am VERY UPSET that nobody was there to answer my call. You should have someone there AT ALL TIMES to pick up the phone. I would be desirous of it being picked up by the third ring, but the fourth would have even been ACCEPTABLE in my book. I would like ten cases of beer as compensation and I get a 3-hour advance notice every time that special brew which is impossible to predict is going to be ready. I AM VERY IMPORTANT DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?"

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 9:31 am 
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maybe he wants to complain that there aren't enough pleasing color schemes on your shirts.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 12:35 pm 
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Lime and a Coconut
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I can't forking get 'careless whisper' out of my head now. I had to watch both the Sergio video and the original George Michael video this morning while getting ready for work. and maybe singing to and dancing with my dogs.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 12:37 pm 
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Heeeerrrrree's JACKY!
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So, I need to call a client because some important dates got moved around for them. But the only number they gave me is a fax number. Or some other something that leads to a horrible screeching electronic noise in my ear. I would really like to be able to tell them not to show up to court on the day they thought, but rather show up on the day they need to. Bench warrants don't help cases.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 12:39 pm 
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Nailed to the V
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That is my coworker's favorite song. He pretends it's in an ironic way, but I CAN TELL IT IS NOT

We call it "Careless Whisper (Adam's theme)."


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 1:21 pm 
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Lime and a Coconut
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NO SHAME, ADAM. Careless Whisper is a legitimately cheesy and legitimately awesome song. I have loved it since the first time I heard it on my mom's radio!

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 7:37 pm 
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kfad wrote:
So, I need to call a client because some important dates got moved around for them. But the only number they gave me is a fax number. Or some other something that leads to a horrible screeching electronic noise in my ear. I would really like to be able to tell them not to show up to court on the day they thought, but rather show up on the day they need to. Bench warrants don't help cases.


That is irritating. Could you try sending a fax with the new information to the number? That way, if it is a fax machine, at least they might get the message?

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 7:47 pm 
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I ended up trying that and then sending a hard copy letter to the address we have.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 10:56 pm 
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Vegan Vegan Vegan Vegan Vegan
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A 'I am going out of my way to be grumpy' customer came in just as I was wishing someone a nice day and said "don't you dare tell ME to have a nice day when I leave!", and when I asked if I could help him find anything or if he wanted a sample he gruffly but endearingly told me I was being annoying.

So after he cashed out I put on the charm and said "have a miserable day!" And he burst out laughing and told me he deserved that.

So basically, today was weird.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Aug 07, 2014 4:51 am 
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^That's awesome!


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Aug 07, 2014 11:01 am 
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You're awesome, Moon! I'm glad that guy had a laugh, too. I have days like that, and I'm so grateful when I forget to be a grump for a minute and actually laugh.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Aug 07, 2014 12:25 pm 
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Lime and a Coconut
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That's awesome. There's nothing like getting a grump to smile by indulging their grumpiness.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Aug 07, 2014 12:48 pm 
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Erika Soyf*cker wrote:
NO SHAME, ADAM. Careless Whisper is a legitimately cheesy and legitimately awesome song. I have loved it since the first time I heard it on my mom's radio!


Erika, do I have a cover for you (and Hollie's coworker Adam):

http://www.postmodernjukebox.com/2014/03/08/variations-on-careless-whisper/

No shame in the careless whisper game.


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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Aug 07, 2014 1:28 pm 
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I had another weird caller today:

Me: Fire & Rescue Service
Caller: Is that John Lewis?
Me: No, are you looking for someone who works here called John Lewis, or the shop?
Caller: The shop
Me: You've called the Fire Service
Caller: Oh, I'm expecting one of their engineers and they haven't turned up, how inconvenient. Are you sure you're not John Lewis.
Me: Yeah pretty sure, I'll have to end the call now.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Aug 07, 2014 4:30 pm 
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Heeeerrrrree's JACKY!
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Star wrote:
I had another weird caller today:

Me: Fire & Rescue Service
Caller: Is that John Lewis?
Me: No, are you looking for someone who works here called John Lewis, or the shop?
Caller: The shop
Me: You've called the Fire Service
Caller: Oh, I'm expecting one of their engineers and they haven't turned up, how inconvenient. Are you sure you're not John Lewis.
Me: Yeah pretty sure, I'll have to end the call now.


Are you sure though? Because maybe you don't know you are John Lewis. How weird would that be.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Aug 07, 2014 4:31 pm 
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Coming to a theater near you... Being John Lewis. Look out for little doors and things, maybe you're in a movie or something.

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 Post subject: Re: Very Special Customers/Clients
PostPosted: Thu Aug 07, 2014 11:52 pm 
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Location: Lorien
kfad wrote:
Star wrote:
I had another weird caller today:

Me: Fire & Rescue Service
Caller: Is that John Lewis?
Me: No, are you looking for someone who works here called John Lewis, or the shop?
Caller: The shop
Me: You've called the Fire Service
Caller: Oh, I'm expecting one of their engineers and they haven't turned up, how inconvenient. Are you sure you're not John Lewis.
Me: Yeah pretty sure, I'll have to end the call now.


Are you sure though? Because maybe you don't know you are John Lewis. How weird would that be.


We get this type of call in groups for some reason, the day before my colleague had a gentleman who was having issues with his washing machine and the day before I got someone asking about legal requirements for sheds and garden fences. The weird thing is John Lewis is one of the companies I wouldn't mind working for but the uniforms & fire engines confirmed for me that its the FS!

torque wrote:
Coming to a theater near you... Being John Lewis. Look out for little doors and things, maybe you're in a movie or something.

That would be good, but if I'm in a movie I want a pay rise!

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