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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 9:45 am 
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it's also possible that you haven't been eating enough iron or something. your body can give you cravings for something when it's low on a nutrient.

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 11:04 am 
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Welcome back, Jagadeesh! A lot of good things here! When I find myself craving meat, it usually means that I want grease and salt, so I'll treat myself to something deep fried, and then I get heartburn and call it a day. Deep fried Brussels sprouts are amazing and totally worth it, in case you were wondering.

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 11:46 am 
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Calls "cavemen" on that
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I agree with everything that everyone said, including the bit about coming back here even if you are not vegan! Hang out in the cooking forum, get motivated!

One thing to add...when I went vegan, it was for the animals. But not 100%. There was a small part of me that did it as a means of self control. I knew it was going to be hard. I loved cheese. I have an omni partner. I was an event manager, which meant being around non-vegan food all the time, even selecting food for groups of people. So for me, a small part of it was making a decision to change my diet and lifestyle to line up with my ethics, and STICK WITH IT.

And I have. For about 4 years now. And I am incredibly proud of myself, because it was hard, but I did it. Temptations and cravings all the time. Even now. I have the "Using Dreams" often where I eat meat, usually steak.

What I am trying to say it, we all get the cravings. It's up to YOU to beat them, if you really want to.

Obviously you are bothered by the fact that you strayed.....start getting excited by vegan food again! Check out some good pinterest vegan boards, hang out here, buy a new awesome vegan cookbook! If you really want to get back on the path to veganism again, you can.

And I am of the school of thought that if it is a process for you to do this, not 100% vegan all at once, that is ok. I am aware that a lot of other vegans do not share this opinion, and yeah, they would rip you a new one. But most of us on the PPK are not like that :)


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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 1:18 pm 
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Everyone has already said it well enough, so I just wanted to say it's lovely to see you back here!

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 1:32 pm 
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supercarrot wrote:
it's also possible that you haven't been eating enough iron or something. your body can give you cravings for something when it's low on a nutrient.


Although usually not for the things that actually contain that nutrient, weirdly enough. People who are anemic usually develop pica, which involves cravings for non-food items (ice, chalk, etc.).


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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 2:00 pm 
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Jagadeesh wrote:
I guess I just wanted to know if meat had a half-life.

If your memory is as bad as mine eventually you will forget what it even tasted like.

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 3:09 pm 
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My secret weapon is the Gardein Mandarin Chick'n - greasy, crispy and salty. And frighteningly "meaty".


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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 3:14 pm 
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Wallace22 wrote:
My secret weapon is the Gardein Mandarin Chick'n - greasy, crispy and salty. And frighteningly "meaty".
Better yet, Trader Joe's sells it under their own brand name for about half the price!

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 3:21 pm 
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Chicki wrote:
What I am trying to say it, we all get the cravings. It's up to YOU to beat them, if you really want to.


I think cravings are a bit of a cop-out. We all have impulses - not just for food - that we then can choose to follow or not. Your diet is a choice and you can structure it any way you want to. If you want to be vegan except for Amma's chai, scones and paneer, then you're still saving a ton of animals and avoiding suffering.

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 5:42 pm 
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Yo jagadeesh! We missed ya!

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 7:54 pm 
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You guys are so friggin' wonderful. I'm so glad I overcame my hesitation and came back to ya'll.

I have read (and will continue to read and reflect upon) each and every response. They are so very valuable to me.

Let me say that my choice to eat some dairy was totally separate from the cravings. I agree with those of you who have said if one makes a choice to be vegan, then be vegan. I chose to live a clean and sober life and don't allow myself "vacations". I also see the point that was raised a few times that is equally as valid: being vegan is about doing the least harm possible (I'm paraphrasing, of course).

Again, I will never eat meat again. I need to reiterate that. I'm not trying to use the cravings as an excuse to let the meat back in. :)

I'm just scared shiitake-less that the cravings won't go away. I don't know if ya'll took me at my word: I am literally having cravings for meat at *least* once an hour, every day, all day. For months and months now. This is after six years of eating compassionately (and only the occasional, maybe once a month craving). I'm not looking for pity or attention or anything, I'm just going a bit crazy with desperation for them to go away.

Whether they do or they don't, I'm glad I have you guys to talk to. I look forward to coming home to ya'll.

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 8:07 pm 
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Jagadeesh wrote:

Whether they do or they don't, I'm glad I have you guys to talk to. I look forward to coming home to ya'll.


<3

also, i know your funds are somewhat limited, but what about hypnosis? it might help. if there is a social work teaching school near you, they might have super sliding scale for hypnotherapy!
xo
kittee

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 8:10 pm 
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My cash is for yarn and food. If I can't pay in trade, fork 'em. :P

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 8:17 pm 
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Are you getting enough calories in general? It seems odd to me to be craving ANYthing once an hour every hour.

Are you being super restrictive in another area of your life?

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 8:32 pm 
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J-Dub, no. You should see me - I'm so fat it's embarrassing. I'm not restricting myself in any other way.

Dubs, I was brought up a foodie. My dad planned vacations around restaurants. I've spent my whole life traveling to cities just for certain food. Just saying that my family is very foodcentric. We love it. After all these years I can still remember the texture and taste of everything I've ever eaten because it was more than eating - it was an experience, and savored, and talked about, and reminisced upon. "Remember that shrimp appetizer at Commander's Palace??" or "How about that buffalo at Hedgerose Heights Inn?" or "Waffle House grits are good!". LOL. My dad also shows love with food. He's a gourmand. A chef. A truly astounding food fixer. Are you getting my point? I'm not surprised that I'm having cravings (28 years of eating meat and all) but am surprised at the intensity, time duration of each craving, and the long period for which the cravings have been going (after five and a half years of relatively no cravings).

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I wish I was eating a vegan kielbasa in a yurt right now.... Tofulish


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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 10:31 pm 
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Yeah, that kind of frequency and intensity of cravings coming up randomly really sounds like there's something else going on in your life that's triggering it.


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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 10:38 pm 
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Yeah, I will have to look at that. The only blatantly obvious tragic things that have happened to me have been within the last three months. So I will have to dig deep and see.

Have I told all of you that you're wonderful?

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 11:42 pm 
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Ok now I feel weird because after about four years not eating meat, I don't really crave it. I think, though, with me, if I DID cave in for some reason and eat a meat item, I would be back to wanting more of it, though. Also, Jagadeesh, you are NOT embarrasingly fat (I've seen pictures and I am pretty sure you posted them here, remember?!) You also happen to be awesome, and I am jealous of kittee for getting to have a phone convo with you because your voice is so damn sexy! As per the reading you did for me-also very talented there. Stay on the ppk, we need you!

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 9:13 am 
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yeah, i think the only reason i don't crave it is because it so thoroughly grosses me out.

jagadeesh, do you think you can get yourself to think of it as something so utterly disgusting? maybe think of your childhood eating outings not as nostalgic, but think of how gross it was? (i had a picture of myself at thanksgiving holding up this giant turkey leg with skin hanging off of it and miming taking a bite out of it. blergh! gives me the shivers. but i know i didn't think of it that way when i was there being photographed. and now i avoid spending thanksgiving at a place that will have a turkey on the table. makes me too sad to imagine the horrors it's gone through, and the scent makes me nauseous.)

maybe you can think of superbugs and other disease causing organisms. maybe putrefaction? imagine how much like puke cheese smells like. can you think of the poop? and how it's common for animal products to be contaminated?

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I solved it for once and for all -- and for everyone -- by intentionally leaving behind some 9-lives burritos... ~Lorelei4mc
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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 10:12 am 
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Ariann wrote:
Yeah, that kind of frequency and intensity of cravings coming up randomly really sounds like there's something else going on in your life that's triggering it.
Jagadeesh wrote:
Yeah, I will have to look at that. The only blatantly obvious tragic things that have happened to me have been within the last three months. So I will have to dig deep and see.
Yes, it seems like what is going on could very well be emotion-based (and of course the whole mind/emotion/body separation thing is a false western construction anyway). For my own part, I can definitely say that when I'm feeling overstressed, insecure, anxious, and/or in need of a little babying, I go straight for the carbs: buttered toast, noodles, anything wrapped in pastry, etc. Under ordinary circumstances I don't eat a lot of that sort of stuff, but if I'm in a fragile place it's the first thing I want.

So maybe taking a hard look at what's bothering you might help you figure out what it is you're really craving? And I'm sure you know this from being in recovery (BTW, well done for getting and staying clean and sober, which is no mean feat!), it doesn't have to be something enormously tragic, or something that's happened recently; two and a half years after she died, I'm still occasionally blindsided by the immediacy of how much I miss my mom, often with no "apparent" trigger. So listen to your feelings, and see what they're trying to say, and remember to be kind to yourself. Some of the best advice I've ever received was to ask yourself if you would treat/speak to anyone else the way you do to yourself; all too often the answer is "no." Hang in there!

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 11:13 am 
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Desdemona wrote:
two and a half years after she died, I'm still occasionally blindsided by the immediacy of how much I miss my mom, often with no "apparent" trigger. So listen to your feelings, and see what they're trying to say, and remember to be kind to yourself. Some of the best advice I've ever received was to ask yourself if you would treat/speak to anyone else the way you do to yourself; all too often the answer is "no." Hang in there!

I am just quoting this for general awesomeness, and 100% agreement with all of it.

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 12:25 pm 
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Jagadeesh wrote:

Have I told all of you that you're wonderful?


once or twice.

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 Post subject: Re: Help a brother out?
PostPosted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 12:32 pm 
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I am vegan four years & vegetarian for 18 but I still have dreams where I am eating things I shouldn't be eating. I am also gluten free. I will have dreams where I am eating something with bread, butter, cheese, etc sometimes. Sometimes in the dream or after the dream I get all upset like OMG I wasn't supposed to eat that! But in the dream it usually feels sort of confusing. I do sometimes think a part of this is that especially with the gluten free added I feel like I am really intensely restricting my food choices. Or that I have to be kind of hypervigilant/on guard around food and ingredients. I think this carries over into my dreams. Is it possible that by being in recovery from substances and also requiring a strict vegan diet of yourself that this is just too much right now? Be kind to yourself, go easy on yourself. You don't say how long you have been in recovery - I don't think - but being in recovery takes a lot of emotional work/effort. Maybe until you feel better, more secure, more recovered from your loss of your mother you could have a modified diet but not be full vegan? It sounds like you are holding yourself to some very strict/high standards and this could be causing stress.
When you have the cravings could you journal about it to try to identify what feelings are going on for you at those times? Also, use HALT - are you hungry, angry, lonely, tired at these times? Or any other strong emotion? And then do something caring and healthy for yourself to address whatever feelings come up.
Hope this may help and I haven't overstepped or assumed too much.


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