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 Post subject: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 9:59 pm 
Invented Vegan Meringue
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WHY?!


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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:02 pm 
No-pants hermit 4 lyfe
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it's weird, but i'm not opposed. pizza rollie sounds pretty fantastic. if i find out i can pour pancake batter in there, i'm buying three of them.

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Last edited by acr on Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:04 pm 
Just Loathin' Around!
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I love infomercials! This is brilliant. RollieChop!

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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:09 pm 
Just Loathin' Around!
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acr wrote:
if i find out i can pour pancake batter in there, i'm buying three of them.

Perhaps you need the PandaPan™, the cylindrical cooking system that makes pancakes on a stick!

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Whoopie pies are always a good idea. ---P. bisque

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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:11 pm 
Just Loathin' Around!
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They rise from the cooking cylinder after 3 minutes like a maple-y sweet jesus.

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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:13 pm 
No-pants hermit 4 lyfe
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that is EXACTLY what i need. is there any chance that PandaPan™ comes in a travel version for pancake enthusiasts on the go? is it safe for use in the shower? i could get through my morning routine in half the time!

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"rise from the ashes of douchebaggery like a fancy vegan phoenix" - amandabear
"I'm pretty sure the moral of this story is: fork pants." - cq


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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:15 pm 
Just Loathin' Around!
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HOLD ON! Not only is it safe for use in the shower, it has a built in electric PandaTooth™ tooth brush to cut precious seconds off your morning routine. Just pay separate processing and handling fee.

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Whoopie pies are always a good idea. ---P. bisque

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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:16 pm 
No-pants hermit 4 lyfe
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how did i manage without it?

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"rise from the ashes of douchebaggery like a fancy vegan phoenix" - amandabear
"I'm pretty sure the moral of this story is: fork pants." - cq


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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking brilliant
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:18 pm 
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Here you've been, flipping pancake batter left and right like a chump. What a mess! And all that clean up to boot. But no more!

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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:33 pm 
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The best thing is, if you buy now you'll finally be able to see in color. No more living your life in black and white!

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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:37 pm 
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Hold on. I have it on good authority from other infomercials that cracking an egg is a harrowing and difficult experience, and yet now they want me to be able to crack an egg into this tiny little hole? Surely this must come with a separate device to help me crack eggs.


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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:40 pm 
Had sex with a vampire that sparkles.
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Best part is this bisque cooking eggs at her desk at work. Yeah. That'll fly.

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The thing about this thread is, it's dumb. - IJDI


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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:42 pm 
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I wonder if you could cook a Vegg in it. Breakfast pizza Vegg on a stick!

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"We'll be eating our own words 30 years from now when we're demanding our legislators outlaw aerosol-based cyber dildo-wielding death holograms."- Brian


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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:42 pm 
No-pants hermit 4 lyfe
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pandacookie wrote:
maple-y sweet jesus

this needs to be a subnick. and maybe my next halloween costume.

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"rise from the ashes of douchebaggery like a fancy vegan phoenix" - amandabear
"I'm pretty sure the moral of this story is: fork pants." - cq


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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:43 pm 
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Mmmmm. Maple-y sweet jesus.

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Whoopie pies are always a good idea. ---P. bisque

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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:49 pm 
No-pants hermit 4 lyfe
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i know i'm going to say that every time i eat pancakes from now on, and at some point i'll probably have to try to explain it to someone. i guess i'll carry a video of this infomercial around with me while i wait for my wireless portable PocketPandaPan™ to be processed and handled.

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"rise from the ashes of douchebaggery like a fancy vegan phoenix" - amandabear
"I'm pretty sure the moral of this story is: fork pants." - cq


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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 11:28 pm 
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Can I get $10 off the RollaPandaPopnLock™? With free sweet jebus on a stick?

International delivery?

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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 11:55 pm 
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We always ship internationally! Just a one time shipping and processing fee. PopnLock your way to the perfect stick food!

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Whoopie pies are always a good idea. ---P. bisque

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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2013 12:07 am 
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Well, tickle me fingers and call me Fred! If that's not a deal and a half I don't know what is.

Do you have some kind of house party I can shackle myself to?

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"I will take a drugged, sex-crazed, punk rock commie over Mrs. Thatch any day of the week" - Vantine
"I have so much more creepiness inside of me that I should share with the world" - bastah


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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2013 12:10 am 
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We at PandaInternational™ love to get poor people trying to better their situations involved in money making scams! I like to think I deserve good things for being so dang magnanimous so I take double the money!

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Whoopie pies are always a good idea. ---P. bisque

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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2013 12:12 am 
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But you get double the work of trying to foist off our most excellent products onto whoever you can coerce into buying the PandaWow™! It's a towel that doubles as a bathmat. WOW!

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Whoopie pies are always a good idea. ---P. bisque

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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2013 12:22 am 
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I would love to do double the work for half of the money and a PandaCash loan at 1053% interest! where do I sign? I gots BINGO to play with my cash money. Hot damn will I sell a bathmat or ten for PandaProfits.

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"I will take a drugged, sex-crazed, punk rock commie over Mrs. Thatch any day of the week" - Vantine
"I have so much more creepiness inside of me that I should share with the world" - bastah


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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2013 3:51 am 
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Holy vertical cooking technology batman!


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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2013 7:35 am 
Dislikes Rick Santorum
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the only thing i dont absolutely love about this whole thread is im not quick and witty enough to join in.

perhaps there is a PandaProduct to help me with that.

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Damn dirty vegan hippies and their carob.~~Moon

It's just funny to think that we could go through years of this, become the president of the damn country, and still, we'd be eating pasta with veggies at every. damn. function.~~Joyfulgirl


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 Post subject: Re: Omnivores are forking weird
PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2013 7:50 am 
Vegan Vegan Vegan Vegan Vegan
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I love informercials! BUT HOLD ON, Pizza Rollie sounds amazeballs! (yeah, it's still super weird though.)

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Awesome. Vegan. Rad.


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