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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2013 7:55 pm 
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Love makes a family! You have friends and people who care about you boober. Don't stay in the false comfort of an unpleasant known when the unknown has the potential to be so much better. Onward!

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2013 8:39 pm 
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I've got another sinus infection and they gave me huge pills. At least I get a sick day to recover.


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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2013 8:42 pm 
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Wallace22 wrote:
I came on here to whine but now I'm just going to give Boober a big hug and agree with Fezza and everyone else said. Sorry Boober.


omg no what? please whine lots, do not let me stop you from whining. whining is like, my favorite pastime.

here:
omg, so I accidentally got the instant oats with fake sugar instead of real sugar and my entire life tastes like chemicals now.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2013 9:24 pm 
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I had the scariest experience of my life today. I took poopiebaby shopping with me, and after we got inside the main doors of the grocery store I let go of his hand so I could put my shopping bags and purse in the cart, when he started whining about wanting to go in the OTHER set of doors, not the set we went in. I said we could go out those doors when we leave, but he started walking toward the door. I said "STOP" in my serious voice, but that just made him start running. Out the door. Straight toward the parking lot where people speed through without looking. My heart stopped and I took off after him, and thankfully he turned when he got out the door rather than running straight into traffic, but he was about 15 feet from the door by the time I caught him (he's a fast runner, and he had a head start). I grabbed him and ran back inside to try and prevent someone from stealing my unattended purse with all my money and keys and cell phone (thankfully it was still there).

One thing that I really don't get is that I was yelling stop and running after him, and he ran right past people who saw what was happening, but no one did anything. I know people are afraid to get involved and everything, but if I was standing next to a place where cars are driving and saw a run-away toddler, I would grab that kid so forking fast without a second thought.

Ugh, every time I think about it I feel like crying.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2013 9:29 pm 
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oh no, pb! that sounds so scary! i would have stopped him! i've stopped kids from running into the street before even when their parents didn't seem that concerned about what they were doing or when they are just getting too far ahead of their parents and the parent looks like they are about to start running after them.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2013 9:50 pm 
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I'm glad you caught him before anything happened. When I worked at Target I stopped a little girl pushing her baby brother in a stroller out the front door before they hit the crosswalk. Then I spent fifteen minutes walking them around the store until I found their mother in the pharmacy area. She just shrugged when I told her what almost happened.


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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2013 10:29 pm 
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Oh pb that's so scary! I'm glad he's okay.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2013 2:27 am 
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I've had a really weird couple of months mental health wise and it all built up until I had a minor breakdown in my history adviser's office this morning when I went in to get his signature and ended up staying for an hour and cried and talked about all my stress and fear and frustration and feelings of being a failure for having a learning disability. And he didnt even sign the thing in the end because ot our conversation.

Made me realise that my brain is really unhealthy right now and has been for a while and that I need to see my therapist more frequently. So that's a positive, but the events leading up o this realisation really sucked. I keep reliving it and wanting to cry again. I don't know how this guy still puts up with me.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2013 2:33 am 
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I had a majorly traumatic nightmare a couple days ago, like I woke up totally freaking out and had to do all kinds of calming stuff to be able to convince myself that I could safely go back to sleep, and then when I went back to sleep the dream started right back up again where it left off. Ever since then I've been so afraid to go to sleep. So now it's like 2:30am and I'm super tired but I'm afraid to sleep.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2013 8:46 am 
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booberthefraggle wrote:
Wallace22 wrote:
I came on here to whine but now I'm just going to give Boober a big hug and agree with Fezza and everyone else said. Sorry Boober.


omg no what? please whine lots, do not let me stop you from whining. whining is like, my favorite pastime.

here:
omg, so I accidentally got the instant oats with fake sugar instead of real sugar and my entire life tastes like chemicals now.


Eeewww, fake sugar!

OK, if Boober says whine, I shall whine! My email got hacked - luckily nothing harmful, just an annoying ad - and it emailed said ad to EVERYBODY on my work and home contact list. Ex-boyfriends; people to whom I never wished to speak again; TV channels; reporters; famous people (OK, famous person); non-tech savvy family members; you name, it did it.

If that weren't bad enough, I had a massive panic later thinking that it had forked up my computer (and therefore, everybody else's computer), only to discover - after 3 hours and 4 different malware scans - that it was an Internet Explorah issue. Which really, in hindsight, should go in the Best Things thread!

OK, whine over.

And hugs to everyone who needs/wants one.


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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2013 10:42 am 
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booberthefraggle wrote:
celyn wrote:
Boober, that is so awful. You would be justified in dictating the terms of your involvement with your mother for now. I have done this with my parents, and it was useful and empowering. She doesn't get to trash you because she feels like it in the moment.


thank you guys again. I cant tell you how much this means to me.

update under the cut because again, long and slightly tangential and like, unnecessarily personal for the internet.

Spoiler: show
I have cut off contact temporarily, I have an appointment with my school's counselor wednesday, I need to learn ways to deal before I can open up contact.

This is and has been a regular occurrence (along with some other less frequent but more severe things) for my whole life, but I've been having a rough time lately so this particular instance shook me harder.
I don't want to lose her, she's the only parent I ever really had, the only family I ever trusted or saw regularly. I love her, obviously, but I am really only very recently coming to terms with the, well, the abuse she inflicted. I am still in that new headspace where it's hard to admit everything wasn't normal because for the 10 years between my dad leaving and my own exit from that household, I have been told it was expected and explainable and that I did something to deserve it. and I am terrified because without her I have no support system, I have no family I can depend on, but with her so actively in my life I get hurt. and, of course, there is still a part of me that is still afraid she'll be angry with me for talking about it. I have to protect myself, but I'm having a really difficult time.


Boober, if it is any consolation, just before Christmas I cut off contact with my Dad. It was actually over a relatively minor thing but it made me realise that for me the relationship was just toxic and harmful. I grieved (of course) but then felt mostly relief. PM me if you need to talk it over.

Mat.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2013 11:15 am 
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That is scary PB. I've stopped kids before as well. I had something happen not too long ago with a 2 your old or so doing a similar thing, he was running straight for the street so I stopped him.

My husband and I went to Disneyworld (which is probably a pretty safe place to get lost but still), and we were eating in one of their cafe type places and the bathroom had a wall between it and the seating area. I saw 2 girls from the same family go into the bathroom (1 about 4 or 5, other about 8 or 9). The 4 or 5 year old came out when I did and there was a door that led directly out to the park and she headed straight for it. I asked her where her family was, then she ran the other way toward the seating area but there was no way for her family to see her if she had gone out the door.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2013 11:20 am 
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And boober, I know it is hard but having a child doesn't make someone a good parent. It is rough when it is your own. I've cut off contact with my biological father although it is a bit different because we only had sporadic contact since I was 6 when my parents divorced but still. He abused our relationship way too many times.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2013 11:20 am 
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The work computers are so slow today, how am I ever going to get my work done? Logging on has taken twenty minutes. I decided to PPK because it was taking so damn long. I hate when it's like this, such a waste of time.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2013 11:27 am 
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I still feel really burned by a friend. It is making me not trust any of my other friendships.

I wish I could just shake it off, but I never saw it coming and it really seemed out of character for whom I knew the person to be. I feel like I could be wrong about all the people who surround me.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2013 12:10 pm 
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pandacookie wrote:
Love makes a family! You have friends and people who care about you boober. Don't stay in the false comfort of an unpleasant known when the unknown has the potential to be so much better. Onward!


I've said it a hundred times before, but panda is wise. There are such parallels between my story with my parents (my mother specifically, but my father too) and yours with your mother. But it was really liberating when I realized my "family" is what I create out of friends, mentors, my husband's family. People who give a shiitake about me and are rooting for me. I still get pangs of hurt/anxiety when I realize that I don't have a built-in support system like so many people fortunate enough to have sane parents have, but I get to be a good "mom" to myself regardless. And that's something. <3

poopiebitch, that's terrifying!

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2013 12:50 pm 
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paprikapapaya wrote:
pandacookie wrote:
Love makes a family! You have friends and people who care about you boober. Don't stay in the false comfort of an unpleasant known when the unknown has the potential to be so much better. Onward!


But it was really liberating when I realized my "family" is what I create out of friends, mentors, my husband's family. People who give a shiitake about me and are rooting for me.


This! MOst of my really good friends have come together as each other's family because we have craptacular biological families.

Mat.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2013 5:07 pm 
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Huge hugs Boober. There have been many times where I wanted to cut contact with my parents but never did. Our relationship is much less emotionally volatile than it was but I haven't forgotten the past.

I think I lost my purse. I remember putting it into a part of my bag on the bus home and taking my keys out. I haven't removed it from my bag since getting home and it's not there. There was my bus pass, my cashcard and my gym card with about £7 in cash. I've cancelled my cashcard just to be safe and will contact the bus company's travel centre in the morning to see if a kind soul has handed it in. If not I'll be getting a new bus card at lunchtime. It's no big deal, just frustrating. And I've had heartburn on and off all week but today it's been almost continual since 2pm. I've taken antacids but they're not helping much.


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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2013 10:02 pm 
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I had to end it with the guy I was dating. And I saw the mouse again for the first time in months. Boooo Mousey, I was hoping you had gone away! Guess I'll have to do the trashcan/leave it outside trick or some such on saturday.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 12:39 am 
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Sometimes I just feel like the least socially adept person. I have the hardest time knowing when it is my turn to talk in conversations and/or waiting to talk and/or knowing the right next thing to say. I feel like everyone thinks I am super rude but jesus I am trying so hard. Things were easier (at least with regards to the first two points) back when I could take my ADHD meds a million years ago. Sigh.

Not one single experience, just a chain of experiences today.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 1:49 am 
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My workplace is doing this reshuffling of positions that I thought was a great thing at first, and they spun it like I was getting promoted, and like, I kind of AM, but for the tiniest raise and three times the amount of work. A lot of it is stuff I hate doing, whereas not much is where my strengths and skills lie. We are a small business but the owner thinks we should be making as much money as forking Google, and she flips out every year and restructures everything. Also they are making me fire the fiance of one of their longest employees ever, and the couple LIVE on the property, and she is going to cause a huge shitstorm and say awful nasty things about me.

I love my job so much in so many ways, but I don't want it to stress me out when I'm not getting properly remunerated. I know my direct boss sees my potential, but the owner is just a bisque trying to save money. She seems scared to give me responsibility that will utilize my skills because uh oh! Then she'll have to pay me what I'm worth.

Sigh. I just want to be able to pay student loans AND buy kitty litter.


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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 1:54 am 
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ijustdiedinside wrote:
i would have stopped him! i've stopped kids from running into the street before

fatcat wrote:
When I worked at Target I stopped a little girl pushing her baby brother in a stroller out the front door before they hit the crosswalk.

linanil wrote:
I've stopped kids before as well. I had something happen not too long ago with a 2 your old or so doing a similar thing, he was running straight for the street so I stopped him.


Thanks you guys! I wish someone like one of you had been there, they might have saved me from nearly having a heart attack. The more I think about it, the more I just can't understand NOT stopping a kid running toward traffic. It boggles the mind.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 1:58 am 
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So sorry poopie! That sounds horrible.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 1:59 am 
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poopiebitch wrote:
Thanks you guys! I wish someone like one of you had been there, they might have saved me from nearly having a heart attack. The more I think about it, the more I just can't understand NOT stopping a kid running toward traffic. It boggles the mind.

You were actively aware of the situation, they were not. It takes the mind a bit to process that kind of thing, dots are not always so easy to connect. I'm sure as soon as/if the wheels would have clicked they would have intervened.

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 Post subject: Re: What was the worst thing about your day?
PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 7:15 am 
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Mars wrote:
poopiebitch wrote:
Thanks you guys! I wish someone like one of you had been there, they might have saved me from nearly having a heart attack. The more I think about it, the more I just can't understand NOT stopping a kid running toward traffic. It boggles the mind.

You were actively aware of the situation, they were not. It takes the mind a bit to process that kind of thing, dots are not always so easy to connect. I'm sure as soon as/if the wheels would have clicked they would have intervened.


Yeah that is the other aspect, you have to be able to say "hey where is that kid going? Should he be going there?" sometimes it takes a second to do that and then by the time that happens, the kid could be beyond your reach.

Poopie baby can also run fast, I've seen that little guy go. If the click happened though, I would've hoped someone would've stopped him.

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