Post Punk Kitchen Forum

Ugh that sucks idji! I advocated for my mother really hard and still nothing got done. It was atrocious. It was something like $6,000 a month for a bed and they couldn't be bothered to turn her so she got bedsores that were a mess and they would leave her in soiled, wet sheets for hours at a time. I hate that place so much.

Had a breakdown at work yesterday and got sent home early. I've been having issues w/the guy (that I mostly imagine/cause) and it spilled over into work yesterday. what the fizzle is wrong with me?

that sucks, SD! I'm glad you were able to go home, at least. Get some chocolate and watch some bad tv!

And that really sucks, Tofulish. I hate that some places are so awful. The place I'm working at seems to be pretty good at taking care of people so far and I really hope that I don't witness any awful stuff. I don't know if I could work at a place that didn't care about the residents/patients.

I don't like today; it's sad. I have lots of blankets and it's not cold but I feel really chilled and goosebump-y.

I should revise my plate tectonics PowerPoint, but don't feel like doing anything.

Facebook seriously sucks. I think I might just drop it and camp out on PPK forever.

I forking hate my family. I hate that I hate my family. I hate that my mom gets wasted and tells me I am wasting my life

I was rejected from not one, but two jobs I was hoping for and then I spent the rest of the day answering the same question over and over again about an upcoming horror convention. Not really a bad day, per se, but annoying enough to warrant a complaint.

I think I need to call in for work tomorrow. I've been having a total meltdown. But the kids will have a wasted day and since I'm not on contract I can't afford to risk pissing people off by a sick day. I just don't know that I can get it together enough to go. I don't know what to do. And my head hurts from crying. I hate crying headaches. Everyone in my house is also mad at me because I always have something wrong.

I'm sorry you are having family issues Moon; that's the worst. Just an idea: facebook can be fun if you create an account under an assumed name and only friend cool fun people who's ideas and thoughts you usually respect and enjoy on that account. (My apologies for the misplaced/dangling modifier or whatever is wrong with that sentence. I'm to busy fighting allergies and trying to breath through my nose to fix it.)

Too much is happening at the same time (and not enough actual PhD stuff). I used to get stressed out thinking about staying in town for too long; now I get stressed when I think about leaving (even to do fun stuff, like visit friends who live a few hours away). Also, my body's freaking out the same way it did when I had parasites after India: if I don't get "exactly what I need" "exactly when I need it" everything goes to hell. Fork.

More nightmares. More sleeplessness. Three nights in a row now.

((((((So many hugs)))))))) LW, sometimes it feels like people are mad at us because we're in the grip of our own powerful mood stuff. And then once your mood lifts, things feel so much less dire. I hope that happens soon for you. So sorry things are so hard right now.

Yeah. Huge, huge hugs LW.

Agreed--big hugs, LW. I hope you took a steaming hot shower and were able to get some sleep.

I bashed my head on the wooden foot of the bed last night and woke up still with a turbo headache, bambowww

Mooncup spillage. Gah!

Just spoke to the most horrible rude obnoxious a-hole. He had a massive go at me over a few things, all of which are HIS FAULT because he was too lazy to read the event instructions. Apparently I'm not allowed to tell shitty wankers to go fork themselves.

This is the second time this month this guy has been this rude to me. But when he wants something, he's nice as pie. If he calls again and is rude i'm hanging up on him.

I will never understand why some people think it's ok to speak to people like they are something they've stepped in. Do they honestly think they'll get what they want that way?

Oh my god I literally hit submit on that post and I got another one ranting at me. Can it please be 5 o'clock already.

Urgh. Why are people such fork heads? I got accused of not passing on important information a few weeks but I know I did! Only reason why I remember is because both of those people walked out of the room when I went to them and I had to go after one of them to tell her and she appeared completely disinterested. Now I caught between.... well I know I told one of them because I clearly remember it but on the other hand I'm worried that maybe I didn't and I am psychotic and just imagined it happened when it didn't.

From my memory of events I did pass it on because if I didn't I would end up incredibly anxious, my heart would pound, I would feel physically sick, I would sweat like crazy and constantly ruminate over something disastrous happening until I did pass it on. This happens for little things like not passing on a message that someone has to call someone so if it was something important I could end up having a pretty big relapse with my anxiety. But then, if what they said is the truth and I didn't pass on the information then I must be psychotic.

So yeah.... that was all the worst of my day.

daisychain, I used to be that way at work. I started keeping a daily log of EVERYThING I did. Wrote down the time and date and where it happened, any detail I could think of. I still do it sometimes with stuff I tell my hubby so later when he tells me I didn't, I can check to make sure I did. He thinks he has a steel trap memory so of course it's always my fault. I kick myself sometimes when I don't write it down and it bites me in the butt later.

Thanks for that tip. In another place I worked I started doing that and when something did go wrong and I picked up on it a major ordeal was made of it and I got a disciplinary warning saying I can't be doing that even though my "notes" were vague enough in that I only used initials and it was very shorthand to the point that if someone read it they wouldn't be able to understand it at all. Problem is.... I'm one of those steel trap memories type people so when someone then says it never happened when I can remember it all in vivid detail it is incredibly unnerving.

I am not functioning very well at work anymore. I don't know if it's because I'm frustrated with my job and have sort of mentally checked out, but I find that I am procrastinating a lot and making stupid mistakes. I feel like I'm having to apologize to a lot of people lately for doing dumb things. I don't really even know how to re-focus. I don't really even want to. I keep teetering on the edge of quitting. I feel like going to my boss and telling him that my apathy is making me suck at my job is maybe not the best approach to leaving on a good note, but it's basically true.

Ashley, I had a job where I mentally checked out about 2 months before I left. Things kept happening that made me feel like I couldn't ditch my manager, who I liked but didn't want to work for anymore. Anyway, as much as I hated my job, I also hated that I was doing a terrible job. Don't make yourself stick with it longer than you have to.

When I ran my own business I would go through lulls but going to seminars or learning new techniques would energize me and help me feel passionate again. But with how you've been talking about leaving lately, I doubt that will do the trick for you.

I have actually been to a couple of conferences in the past two weeks, and they have mostly just made me feel more overwhelmed. I guess the problem is that the passion was never there for me. I work in a field I don't particularly care about. I have my moments where I can get into it and feel like I'm really accomplishing something, but those moments are becoming fewer all the time.

I also realize I have done nothing but whine about work for a long time now, so I'm going to try to stop. I'm even annoying myself. I really do appreciate the support and all the good advice I've gotten from you lovely people! I wish I had the sense to follow it already!

The only thing to it is do it.