Post Punk Kitchen Forum

Scratch that. The worst part of my day was my mom texting me to tell me that my pet rat, Hilda, died late this morning. She was staying with my parents because I live in an apartment 12 hours away and I knew that she wasn't much longer for the world, so I wanted for her to be able to be buried under a tree in their backyard.

Today blows.

I'm sorry.

I accidentally poked my eye with a very sharp eyeliner pencil this morning and it's been burning for the past hour :(

I booked a doctor's appointment to see if what I think is an allergy is actually an allergy and it costs money to get allergy tested. That's awful.

Basically, seitan sausages give me hayfever and flu-like symptoms and I have a runny nose all year round. I think it's a wheat allergy, although it could be the yeast. And it will cost me money to find out! This is England! Diagnoses don't cost money! BOO!

Moving office and I'm so exhausted. I also took a benzo to help me with the stress and I feel weird. Weirdweirdweird.

I'm itchy and tired and work has lost its charm.

I was up all last night worrying over a sick kitty, and tried to sleep today without much success. I haven't slept more than an hour or so since I got up Thursday morning. I'm going to stop trying to nap and stay up for awhile, then take a benadryl before bed. Hopefully that will knock me out enough to get some real sleep.

We had a fire drill at the end of the day, and it took them forking FOREVER to turn the alarms off and let us back inside (kids were already gone for the day since they gotmto leave when it went off). This meant I had to stand outside for over 15 minutes. 3-5 minutes is my max for standing without excruciating pain and my spine going numb, so now I can't walk and it hurts so much. It's better than it was this afternoon, but probably because I had to dope myself up. There wasn't anywhere to sit on a grassy field, and I was wearing an above knee skirt.

It took me 10 minutes to walk back inside after, which was embarrassing. It's not a long walk--30 seconds under normal conditions.

I know, life isn't fair, blah blah, but it isn't fair that now my entire weekend will be spent recovering from this stupid fire drill. It feels like a red hot poker sticking up my spine, but my legs are still numb so I can't go upstairs, which means getting food and drinks is impossible. Laying down hurts, sitting up hurts.

fork. This is just bad.

/end whine

Good thing: thanks Fee! I got a strawberry Frappuccino on my way home (thank you, drive thrus) and am finishing it now. Very soothing and indulgent. I gave a little to Molly earlier; she loves it.

I was starving and found a falafel packet mix, then forgot the falafel in the pan because I was getting sidetracked by a ranty FB woman going off at my friend in a really irrational way. And so my falafels got all burnt and I made them too thick and they don't look properly cooked on the inside :( Oh and the hummus I just made is too runny. But I'm so hungry, I ate them anyway.

Hostel crud. Or maybe staying out late crud. Not sure. Either way, it sucks.

Your workplace sounds really inconsiderate of your needs. I hope you feel better soon.

I've been thinking of getting a seat stick (something like this one) because I have a similar window of pain where if I don't get to sit down after a certain amount of time for a certain amount of time I'm forked for the next day or two with pains running down my legs. Have you tried anything like this, might it be any good for you to have around in case the same thing happens again?

I agree with jogirl. It really does sound like your workplace routinely treats your "invisible" disability as though it doesn't exist, especially after the parking situation. Do you think there is someone you could talk to to advocate for you?

Parking is ok so far this year.

But fire drills are not usually longer than 3 minutes. I'm not sure what anyone could have done.

The AP is supportive, but others in the dept are not. They routinely run together on the weekends, and do half marathons. They don't get it.

Those seat sticks look pretty cool.

This has really driven home to me what a problem I do have. I've had pain etc recently, but I'm used to that. This is still totally debilitating and miserable today. I haven't been able to get upstairs to see Moll yet.

The water aerobics was helping. Hopefully I can afford that by November. The monthly is only $40, but the join fees and equipment are quite a lot , esp since I'm still waiting for news on my GED job.

lavawitch, is there any way they could have a chair ready for you to use during fire drills so you don't have to stand? Sorry if that's a dumb or obvious suggestion. It just seems so unfair to require you to do something that hurts you.

In a political school environment, you have to be really careful about making any sort of waves. Also, my contracts are temporary only, so I need goodwill at the end of the year to be rehired. If they think you are too much trouble, they can find someone else.

Usually though, fire drills haven't been an issue. 90% of the time, we are called back into the building before we have gone very far. If I had been smart enough to grab my bag, I'd have gone to sit in my car.

I'm a little wary because I have some idea that I'm not on the dept chair's good side. I'm really not sure why or even if I'm correct. She has little patience for these issues. My AP is wonderful. She arranged the new parking spot and asked last week how it is.

Last year, some may remember my job was up in the air and I was so stressed about being rehired or not. Well, the AP made at least three or four obscure comments to me since school started about how happy she is to have me at the school, and thanks for trusting her (meaning not applying other places and aging faith she would rehire me), and that even if it doesn't always seem like it, she fights for us and tries to keep toxicity out of the department. Very weird. She repeated the same thing to me on several occasions as if there is some message for me to get. I'm not sure what it is. My only guess is something with the dept chair. The actual principal is very laid back, easy going, friendly, and let's his APs manage as they see fit; I've only interacted with him in pleasantries at the meetings. Plus, he was on excellent terms with the old teacher who retired, so I know he heard good things about me from him.

You know, you can often get initiation fees waived if you explain why they would be a hardship. You just have to be convincing (a friend of mine who has plenty of money gets them waived all the time - she just makes her case very convincingly!), I hope you can get water aerobics again soon.

I am glad you have some support - you seem like an amazing teacher and a very sweet person, and you deserve to have people make your life a bit easier and help you not feel so isolated.

They have a way to waive the fees--I just can't do it. The join fee is $275, but if you attend a series of mini tours each night for your first week at either noon or 6pm, they waive it all. Since the place is still 45 minutes from home, I can't get there when I work. I hate living in the middle of nowhere!

They said the philosophy is that this is a wellness center not a gym, and they want each member to thoroughly understand all the resources and benefits. They do have a great class schedule and physical therapists who will work with you (cheaply) to develop a program.

Thanks for the kind words!

Day 5 of staying at my moms house to help after she got a new hip. I love my mom but her husband drives me nuts. He is super worried that we might forget "he is not in the best of heath either". We know, you tell us all the time, heck you told the nurses and the doctors all about how sick you are.

He also likes to tell me "I was going to get you something, but was not sure what you could eat" He keeps offering me some jerky he has had hidden in his office for who knows how long. You know, until he remembers I don't eat that! Har!har!har!

oops wrong thread!

Can you join during the winter break or spring break?

My confidence as a performer is broken.

I need to join much sooner than that. Right now, I haven't had a paycheck since June, have been hit with a few ancient unexpected medical bills, and my GED hasn't started this month due to grant problems. I'll start getting paychecks first week of October, praise everything good. Going 6 weeks of work without pay SUCKS, especially given how much I have to spend on gas. I can work the join fees into my budget by early November, I'm sure.

: /

Oh no! What happened?

I suffer from anxiety and have always had a real struggle with performing in front of an audience, It's currently so bad that I don't want to perform anymore. I don't think I'm doing anything differently, if anything I'm rocking out more, but inside I'm not feeling it at all.