| Register  | FAQ  | Search | Login 
It is currently Sat Apr 19, 2014 1:12 am

All times are UTC - 6 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 92 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4  Next
Author Message
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sat Oct 23, 2010 9:57 pm 
Not NOT A Furry
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 10:24 pm
Posts: 510
Kinney wrote:
\
There is one woman I know who thinks that people who have children are more "valuable" than people who don't. Like "So and so died, and she had 2 small children! So tragic!" or "So and so died, well, at least she didn't have any children. *next topic*" Sometimes I'm convinced she has no idea how here words sound then they come our of her *blankity blank blank* mouth.

I'd rather have 7 dogs and 5 cats and a pig. To each their own, I guess.


Wow, that quote from the woman you know is horrible! I remember when I was younger thinking that most adults had kids and that is what made you a good/worthy person or something. Then I recall asking my married 5th grade teacher (who I adored) if she had children. She told me she didn't and that opened up my eyes big time. I thought to myself, "Wow, she is amazing and is a great person and she doesn't have kids. You don't have to have kids to be a wonderful person." This has helped me to be at peace with my decision to not have children.

When people ask if I have kids now, I tell them I have 3 feline sons! :)

_________________
Blog: Tuxedo Cat - My Vegan Life
Facebook: Tuxedo Cat: My Vegan Life
Twitter: @TuxedoCatVegan


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sat Oct 23, 2010 10:13 pm 
Trapped On A Desert Island With A Cow
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 1:39 pm
Posts: 456
Location: Wisconsin, USA
I have 2 fur babies, and when I take Doc to visit my parents, my mom always says "Doc, come to grandma". She spoils her fur grandbabies so much! (The funny thing is, my mom isn't an animal person, but the way she treats my dog and cat, you would have no idea!)


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sat Oct 23, 2010 10:15 pm 
Invented Vegan Meringue
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 2:46 pm
Posts: 3822
Location: 5 mi east of philly
my family have known for a while that i don't want kids. i have 3 older siblings, and 6 bio niblings (+2 step-niblings), so my mom is fine with it. it's mr. carrot's mom that i feel sad about. he has only 1 brother who is i think 9 years younger? getting married next week, but luckily i think they're the traditional-type of people, so they'll probably provide them with a grandbaby or two. (they can also afford a child more than we can.)

however, i had said if we had an accidental meeting of gametes, then we'd keep it. (i just hope we don't have an accidental meeting of gametes.) mr. carrot is hopefully going to get the snippety snip. we'll see.

_________________
I solved it for once and for all -- and for everyone -- by intentionally leaving behind some 9-lives burritos... ~Lorelei4mc
supercarrot.com, vegan groupony things, vegan coupons


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sat Oct 23, 2010 10:28 pm 
Can't Dance, Isn't Part of Revolution
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 3:29 pm
Posts: 163
Location: Brooklyn, NY
I have never ever wanted children. People are always yapping on to me about my 'biological clock'
Oh really? I'm 37, when do you suppose that's going to kick in?
Luckily my parents have never pressured me, my mum says she thinks it's best if I don't have any... I don't know whether to be delighted that she knows me so well, or concerned that she thinks I'm a bad person. Either way, my brother has two children now, so nobody ever gives me the sideways glance, my parents say they haven't enough energy for any more grandkids anyway and could my brother please stop spawning now.
All I know is, I'm much... much too selfish to ever have children. I live, without roommates in NY. That means all my money goes to rent and bills. If I have anything left over, I want to spend it on MEMEME!

_________________
If there's something dangerous, sauces are dangerous for the body.
Karl Lagerfeld


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 12:27 am 
Level 7 Vegan
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 11:53 pm
Posts: 1564
No one is bugging me to have babies. I'm going on 27 too. Either people think I'd be a horrible parent, or I'm hanging around people just like me.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 12:41 am 
Attended Chelsea Clinton's Wedding
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 2:08 pm
Posts: 214
Location: St. Catharines, On (Canada)
Hopefully will never be in a situation where I spawn. Stoked to adopt and foster later on in life though.

_________________
Vegan Police Facebook Tumblr Twitter

"POSI JUMP HURTS MY TITS" - Isa.


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 12:50 am 
Asked Santa for a pony
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 9:29 pm
Posts: 2806
Location: Portland
My grandma cried when I told her I didn't want kids. I still can't get over it.

_________________
The Noochy Noodle, my personal obsession with discovering the worlds greatest vegan mac and cheeze


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 1:01 am 
Dying from Nooch Lung
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:28 pm
Posts: 3268
I've always said I never want to have kids and a friend of mine is convinced I will change my mind but I'm pretty sure I won't. I don't mind kids but I've never really felt the need to have my own. And my bf doesn't want any either.

I don't think my parents will care if they don't get grand kiddies but I think my bf's mum would love grand kids.

I have 2 fur babies anyway <3

_________________
CupcakeKitteh


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 1:02 am 
Level 7 Vegan
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Sat Oct 23, 2010 2:41 am
Posts: 1543
Location: "HOLLAND"
chatter710 wrote:
Sarah wrote:
chatter710 wrote:
Wait wait wait, don't you work at Starbucks? Why are customers asking you about kids and not coffee?!

Because all the regulars want to be my friends and I guess they feel entitled to ask me personal questions. I also had a man ask if I was hearing impaired because the coffee grinder was on and I couldn't hear what he wanted. People are lovely.


PEOPLE. Can't stand 'em.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eVSlE28hOgI


Also: I think I'd make a totally unfit mother. It makes me laugh when people tell me the opposite.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 3:03 am 
The Real Hamburger Helper
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 1:04 am
Posts: 2271
Location: UK
monkeytoes wrote:
I don't know why people can't mind their own damn business regardless of what your personal decision is. It's such an intensely personal choice and should be respected, period. I want a child desperately and am seriously running out of time to have one, but I'm not going to project my desire onto someone else. And if I end up having a kid, I'm not going to demand that everyone else does just to validate my choice.


I too desperately wanted children, but it never happened, and I am out of time now. I have just about come to terms with it now, but I used to get seriously upset when people (sometimes almost strangers) would say things like "why did you decide not to have kids?" I don't understand how this subject seems to make people think they can be incredibly rude and insensitive to people they don't even know.

_________________
Everyone turns into Boo Radley, if they live long enough ~ seitanicverses


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 4:08 am 
Bathes in Braggs
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 8:03 pm
Posts: 1332
Location: Denver
I am undecided. Although I feel like I will be okay with it either way, which is a nice place to be. Sometimes I spend time with kids and really love the way they see the world and experience new things, and sometimes I spend time with kids and think that I would really rather just be by myself and not have to worry about someone else. I imagine that parents often feel the same way.

In any case, the presumption that children are the end all of life experience bugs the shiitake out of me.

_________________
my roommate spilled tuna juice on the bathroom floor while he was eating on the toilet! should i bleach the floor or just tear up the tile? - acr
Vegan Coloradical


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 4:32 am 
Aired her grievances, lost the feat of strength
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 1:56 pm
Posts: 3751
Location: Brighton, England.
I get so angry with people's insistence that I'll want kids one day, my mum, sister in law & father in law are convinced that I'll change my mind. I'm 27, I've never wanted children, I definitely do not ever want to have Children. Just before we got married my father in law spent an evening telling me and my husband that the whole point of marriage is to have children, that it's our responsibility to have them & if we don't there'll be nobody to look after us when we're old - what the fizzle?

We've talked about the possibility of adopting a teenager when we're older because it could be a pretty awesome thing to do & I have no interest in young children but there's no forking way anything's coming out of my vagina.

_________________
Blog: Vegan.In.Brighton.

Not-For-Profit Cupcakes: Operation Icing.


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 7:07 am 
Chip Strong
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 1:53 pm
Posts: 998
Location: LxFxOxDx/Thrashachusetts
I don't want kids. It's not even that I dislike kids really, I just don't want any of my own and nothing I see about being a parent makes me want to be one myself.

_________________
"Oh boy. First of all, William Shakespeare's Dildo Liberal Arts College has a great Art History program. Leave them out of this."-Hoveringdog


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 9:43 am 
Wears Durian Helmet
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 5:03 pm
Posts: 844
I would like to share some responses for when people say you should have kids...

"You're right! I should just have one and if I don't like it my mom can raise it. She has a lot of free time."
"I hear the earth is sorely under-populated; I guess I should get started procreating."
"Actually I can't have children..." ('cuz I don't want to!)
"Um yeah I don't take anything home that doesn't have a return policy."
"If that was any of your business you'd already know the answer to that question."


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 9:49 am 
Had sex with a vampire that sparkles.
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:24 pm
Posts: 5315
Location: BRLA
Abelskiver wrote:
"I hear the earth is sorely under-populated; I guess I should get started procreating."


This actually kind of what my stepfather's dad gave me as a reason why I should have kids - and a lot of them. I wasn't really paying attention because I was focusing on trying to melt into a puddle and slip away from the situation, but something about the economy and the generation under us wouldn't be able to provide for us and how that meant I needed to have a lot of kids.

_________________
The thing about this thread is, it's dumb. - IJDI


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 9:59 am 
Semen Strong
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 7:10 pm
Posts: 18627
Location: Cliffbar NJ
jogirl wrote:
monkeytoes wrote:
I don't know why people can't mind their own damn business regardless of what your personal decision is. It's such an intensely personal choice and should be respected, period. I want a child desperately and am seriously running out of time to have one, but I'm not going to project my desire onto someone else. And if I end up having a kid, I'm not going to demand that everyone else does just to validate my choice.


I too desperately wanted children, but it never happened, and I am out of time now. I have just about come to terms with it now, but I used to get seriously upset when people (sometimes almost strangers) would say things like "why did you decide not to have kids?" I don't understand how this subject seems to make people think they can be incredibly rude and insensitive to people they don't even know.


I'm sorry jogirl. People can be so insensitive.

My partner and I are trying to conceive. Our friends and family are always telling us that we should start trying, and that we really should have kids soon, because we're getting on (I'm 39 he's 47) etc. They don't seem to realize that maybe we're trying and just not succeeding. And if we tell them, we always get the same advice - oh just relax and have a lot of sex. Well thank you Dr.

Having a child seems like a pretty cool experience to have, but if we don't conceive, I'm okay with that too. I don't really appreciate that people treat not having a kid like some sort of terrible tragedy that invalidates your life (thanks Dad).

_________________
But on a cold winter night, when the wind whispers through the trees and a bright, white moon hangs heavy in the air, you might hear a sad cry like someone thinking he knows what's best for you, and that'll be the white man a-passin' you by. just mumbles


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 10:07 am 
Prefers Jar Jar Binks over Han Solo
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 2:54 am
Posts: 1984
Location: Munich, finally!
I'm 100% sure I don't want any kids either, and that thread in the old PPK about what happens after you have one just sealed the deal for me. No thanks! I have nothing against kids and I can even play with them for a few hours, but I like to sleep in the morning, thank you very much.
I am considering investigating with my doctor the option of cutting out that possibility altogether. I'm so glad my bf has the same opinion.
And I guess my mum has resigned herself, and puts her hopes in my sister.

_________________
I dunno, I guess I just get enthused over eating big ol' squishy balls. - Interrobang?!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 10:27 am 
Naked Under Apron
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 11:15 am
Posts: 1773
Location: rva
i'm also in the "no kids boat". never wanted them and neither has my spouse. we get a lot of shiitake for it when we visit certain relatives and at wedings and such (i love it when strangers at weddings try and convince you to have kids), but luckily our parents have finally gotten the point that having kids just isn't for us. it is an extremely personal decision, and i've always been baffled as to why people like to ask about it and then try and change your mind. everyone we know with children tells us it's the best things ever and it will change your life and that their kids are so great and their life means so much more now, and that's fine - and i can't really argue with them because i'm not in their shoes, but on the other hand - who's actually going to admit that they really don't enjoy their children as much as they thought they would and that it's not all it's cracked up to be?

just last week i had a coworker tell me i should really have kids. he then proceeded to explain that while he loves his daughter more than anything in the world, he'd never have any other children, but that i should have at least one to see what it's like. really?! i mean, really!? people are brilliant. **sigh**


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 10:44 am 
Trapped On A Desert Island With A Cow
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 1:39 pm
Posts: 456
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Abelskiver wrote:
r
"Actually I can't have children..." ('cuz I don't want to!)


I'm using this one next time, maybe I could even get my eyes to water. Nothing like making a person feel really horrible (and the possibility of me crying) to get them to shut the fork up.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 11:17 am 
Trapped On A Desert Island With A Cow
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 8:28 am
Posts: 415
Location: Au
I'm right there with all of you. I have never wanted kids and people are always asking about when my husband and I are going to. Actually, he just got snipped last weekend! We haven't told anyone in real life yet.

My sister, who's a religious nut (probably a whole thread-worthy discussion in itself) sent me this horrific video from her church about how all christians need to have as many kids as possible to outnumber the muslim population! I thought, first of all I'm atheist so ya aren't really hooking me in with this shiitake, plus the thought of more and more Christians running around only deters me MORE from having a kid of my own...and I can't even begin to go into everything else that is depressingly awful about that video...


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 11:24 am 
Thinks chickens are assholes
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 1:17 pm
Posts: 5468
Kinney wrote:
Abelskiver wrote:
r
"Actually I can't have children..." ('cuz I don't want to!)


I'm using this one next time, maybe I could even get my eyes to water. Nothing like making a person feel really horrible (and the possibility of me crying) to get them to shut the fork up.


I don't like this idea, I feel it makes a mockery out of people who really can't have children.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 11:26 am 
Thinks Plants Have Feelings
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 9:31 pm
Posts: 61
Location: IL
I've known that I'm not cut out to be a parent for about as long as I can remember. You know how some people will say "I'm not a dog person" or "I'm not a cat person"? That's how I feel about kids; nothing against them, just not my thing. I have no maternal instinct whatsoever, and I think just about everyone who knows me has figured out that I'm not going to reproduce.

Abelskiver wrote:
"Um yeah I don't take anything home that doesn't have a return policy."


This is great, I will probably use this sometime in the future!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 12:24 pm 
Dead by dawn
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 9:54 pm
Posts: 7441
Location: Seattle
fezza wrote:
Kinney wrote:
Abelskiver wrote:
r
"Actually I can't have children..." ('cuz I don't want to!)


I'm using this one next time, maybe I could even get my eyes to water. Nothing like making a person feel really horrible (and the possibility of me crying) to get them to shut the fork up.


I don't like this idea, I feel it makes a mockery out of people who really can't have children.

Yeah, I don't think it's necessary to co-opt other people's suffering just to make a point to rude people. If it was someone who you thought would actually take it to heart, you might say something like, "You know, some people can't have children and don't necessarily advertise their personal struggles. When you pressure someone about having children, you really don't know what kind of emotions you might be stepping on." But if that would fall on deaf ears, stick with the funny ones like not taking home anything without a return policy. I know this is a posi child-free thread, but if you want people to respect your child-free choice you should remain respectful of people who may want to but can't, right?

_________________
facebook
"The PPK: Come for the pie; stay for the croissants." - tinglepants!
"Cockblocked by Richard Branson- again!" - Erika Soyf*cker


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 12:33 pm 
Making Threats to Punks Again
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 3:36 pm
Posts: 1126
I probably won't get any kids, because I'd rather spend my time painting my nails and napping. I like kids, but that's when I can give them back after I'm done playing. But when people ask me how many kids I want to have or whatever, I just say "I can't get pregnant, and I probably won't adopt either." And then people go "oh, I'm so sorry, that's so awful." No, it's cool, I so don't care that I can't get pregnant. It's not a big deal to me.

_________________
"I will rip out your IV and other roman numerals." - pandacookie
"The one thing I would not do for Aubrey Plaza is harm a baby, by the way." - strawberryrock


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 1:46 pm 
So Totally Yiffy
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:48 pm
Posts: 45
Location: Nebraska
I kinda dislike children between the ages of 14 months and 16 years old. (If they can't talk or if they can have an interesting [to me] conversation, then they are mostly okay).

For the longest time, I never wanted children. However, I'm now on the fence. I met my SO about three years, and I'm now warming up to the idea of kids, but procreating isn't in our plan for life right now because we don't have time or money to correctly raise kids.

Whenever I get asked about babies, I tell the person that kids aren't in our five year plan. I get the oddest expressions and responses back, like "you have a five year plan?" "Yes, we'd like to budget for the parasites, I mean kids."

The thing that really forking annoys the shittake out of me is that my co-workers know my stance but only talk about babies during work. I want to punch them in the face because it is just repeated conversation everyday. In addition, my husband is in the military, so all of the wives only talk about their "daytime hobbies" (seriously? I have this thing called a job) and about babies (whether or not they have any). I'm surrounded!

I think I'll try the "world is underpopulated" or the "if it was any of your business" responses next time someone asks me about kids.


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Reply to topic  [ 92 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4  Next

All times are UTC - 6 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Baidu [Spider] and 2 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group
Template made by DEVPPL/ThatBigForum and fancied up by What Cheer