Post Punk Kitchen Forum

I do like it.

You like the patriarchy?

Man, that's messed up.

the only non-secondhand pieces of furniture in my living room are my sofa and a game table with a scrabble board that you can flip over to play monopoly on.

Monopoly isn't monopoly unless everybody playing is seething with frustration and rage by the end.

Monopoly: it's all the fun of a divorce proceeding.

the wheelbarrow always tips over. i vote for that one to go.

A co-worker and I were discussing board games just a couple of days ago. I told her if she had grown up 'playing' them with my brother she would loathe all group games as I do. Half way through it would end with pieces thrown on the ground and him storming out, and/or someone crying.

I prefer these

but if she'd grown up playing them alone, they would make her feel safe and good at everything. i'm guessing.

I'm in the "I care more about which one is being eliminated" group.

I used to play and then feel bad when people would be bankrupt so lend them money. And then I'd go bankrupt and no one would repay me the money. More heart than sense, I suppose.

Cat, I liked the robot until I saw its "stache", but cat would have won out anyway. I don't mind playing Monopoly as long as I'm the banker since I always cheat at games. It's easy to steal cash right in front of people if you are the banker.

Battleship (old school with the pegs) is truly the best game to cheat at. It's hilarious.

Wheelbarrow? what? That's not in any Monopoly I ever ken't...

You should have robbed the bank! I was the watergun bank robber with a heart of gold, but there's no Monopoly playing piece shaped like a gun that shoots flowers when you pull the trigger. That would have been mine.

are you familiar with the horse and rider? maybe my set is european.

Helicopter. The answer is helicopter, people.

I voted cat, but robot would do too.

I voted guitar, but then I saw the robot and wish to change my vote to that.

This is one of the fatal design flaws of Monopoly--it's so ruthless that people will bend the rules in order to make it into a game that humans might enjoy. I'm sure this is the origin of all the house rules about piling money into Free Parking, too. But being kind obviates the end condition and renders the game interminable. You basically have a choice between a cut-throat game where the only joy is in crushing people under your boot, or some severely boring-ass shiitake that lasts forever. More modern games (read: good games) are about keeping people in the game as long as possible, and include things like robust catch-up mechanics to make that interesting. In Monopoly you usually have a good idea who is going to win early in the game, and the rest is all about hurting feelings and driving people away from the table.

The worst is that, like Scrabble, people will cajole you into playing this shiitake. It's like some kind of awful mind virus.

Ever play 'Hotel'?

Now that was some kinda capitalist pure bastid shiitake. I asked Santa for 'The Game of Life' in 1989 but apparently he couldn't get it and the elves made me this instead. Still, plastic Taj Mahal! Or plastic Long Island fancy-castle, as I hear they call it in Ithaca.

Never played that. We did have a game called "Profit and Loss", which nobody ever wanted to play because it sucked so many balls and because it wasn't called Monopoly. The amazing thing is that these hyper-competitive games were, and continue to be, marketed as 'family games'. They are family games in the same way that disowning your kid for being gay is a family value--only if the thing you're trying to accomplish is to tear families apart.

Now, Shadows over Camelot--that's a family game. Battlestar Galactica is a family game if you suspect someone in your family of being a cylon.

BUT WHAT'S IT CALLED IN ITHACA? The people need to know.

Something about Long Island, phone something in, mumble mumble.

Mumbles jist cannae be ersed when acr ain't in the game. SO OBVIOUS. Just jump it already, you guuuuyyyyysss.

I voted guitar until I saw what they looked like now I want to be the robot