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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Sep 08, 2013 1:32 am 
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acr wrote:
my grandfather is in his 80s, and his tattoo still looks rad. anyway, one of the things i'm looking forward to most about being an old saggy bag is not having to give a whit what any of me looks like. i wish i could get a preview of my ancient self; then i could tattoo "BOO!" in a place that'll be in a fold in fifty years, so i could surprise people with it.


alas, you could just get the BOO! tattoo in fifty years, when all the optimal folds have emerged.


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Sep 08, 2013 7:36 am 
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postnothing wrote:
acr wrote:
my grandfather is in his 80s, and his tattoo still looks rad. anyway, one of the things i'm looking forward to most about being an old saggy bag is not having to give a whit what any of me looks like. i wish i could get a preview of my ancient self; then i could tattoo "BOO!" in a place that'll be in a fold in fifty years, so i could surprise people with it.


alas, you could just get the BOO! tattoo in fifty years, when all the optimal folds have emerged.


I might get one under my butt sag!

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Sep 08, 2013 12:17 pm 
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ndpittman wrote:
postnothing wrote:
acr wrote:
my grandfather is in his 80s, and his tattoo still looks rad. anyway, one of the things i'm looking forward to most about being an old saggy bag is not having to give a whit what any of me looks like. i wish i could get a preview of my ancient self; then i could tattoo "BOO!" in a place that'll be in a fold in fifty years, so i could surprise people with it.


alas, you could just get the BOO! tattoo in fifty years, when all the optimal folds have emerged.


I might get one under my butt sag!
Yes! And it should say "You guessed it: VEGAN!"

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Sep 08, 2013 6:18 pm 
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Ugh. Having a facebook argument with someone who started the thread with:
"Jeggings are bad enough...why do people wear *leggings* as pants? And not with tunics or long shirts or dresses--as pants. With normal length tee shirts. My mind boggles at the reasoning." And then her friends piled on with stories of fat people wearing clothes they deem unacceptable - too tight, too short, too long, too sheer, etc.

I called shenanigans on the whole thing and said (after declaring leggings my favorite garment in the universe - they always fit, they're always comfy!):
"But really, I think this whole discussion is kind of gross. It's none of our damn business what other people wear and it's not our job to police people's attire because we think they're apparently just too fat and ugly to appear in public in clothes they find wearable. How about we just let people be comfortable in whatever they're comfortable in and take responsibility for our own judgmental gaze? "

But it continues. And of course, they say, it's not really about fatness, it's about MODESTY. Because your body is GROSS and I shouldn't have to be subjected to it except in the extremely limited ways I have decided are acceptable.


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Mon Sep 09, 2013 5:58 am 
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Ariann wrote:
Ugh. Having a facebook argument with someone who started the thread with:
"Jeggings are bad enough...why do people wear *leggings* as pants? And not with tunics or long shirts or dresses--as pants. With normal length tee shirts. My mind boggles at the reasoning." And then her friends piled on with stories of fat people wearing clothes they deem unacceptable - too tight, too short, too long, too sheer, etc.

I called shenanigans on the whole thing and said (after declaring leggings my favorite garment in the universe - they always fit, they're always comfy!):
"But really, I think this whole discussion is kind of gross. It's none of our damn business what other people wear and it's not our job to police people's attire because we think they're apparently just too fat and ugly to appear in public in clothes they find wearable. How about we just let people be comfortable in whatever they're comfortable in and take responsibility for our own judgmental gaze?"
Because that would remove a way of feeling superior to complete strangers by ganging up and criticizing them!
Ariann wrote:
But it continues. And of course, they say, it's not really about fatness, it's about MODESTY. Because your body is GROSS and I shouldn't have to be subjected to it except in the extremely limited ways I have decided are acceptable.
And how much do you want to bet that these same people have no issue with seeing those they consider acceptably "fit" appearing in "immodest" clothing at the beach or pool, while running, exercising at the gym, etc.?

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Mon Sep 09, 2013 8:39 am 
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The modesty argument irritates me no end. It is a less aggressive but far more passive morality argument (in my head). It tells me that my clothing represents some level of my morals. Or that my clothing, or lack there of, has some bearing on someone elses morals.
And body shape aside, whose comfort zone should I aim for? It is arbitrary and shaming in itself.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Mon Sep 09, 2013 2:30 pm 
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Well, in my response I made it clear that if this a modesty argument, you are trying to oppress others by projecting your "values" on them - clearly they don't share them and don't care. It is no better than picketing soldiers' funerals because America is a gay-lovin' nation or something (these are generally liberals in this conversation). Then the OP's husband starts in on some crazy sexist, crass stuff about women's bodies. I had to walk away, I was being traumatized.


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 8:20 pm 
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I thought this was a great analysis of 6 irresponsible "Fitspiration" pictures.
http://reembody.me/2013/09/10/the-6-mos ... on-photos/

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 8:23 pm 
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Image

Quote:
WHAT THEY THINK THEY’RE SAYING:

“Beauty used to be about getting thin but not anymore, ladies! We’re not after waifish waistlines, we’re after strength!”

WHY IT’S bullshiitake:

Quick! What do all three of the women pictured above have in common? If you said, “they’re all skinny”, you’re exactly right!

The fitness industry—from gyms to clothing manufacturers—collectively produces more propaganda than North Korea, a lot of it just as crazy. This particular class of ads is almost comically absurd because what’s written on the picture directly contradicts the picture. It would be like if Oscar Meyer produced an ad saying “vegetables are awesome, eat those instead of hot dogs!” printed over images of freckled Normal Rockwell kids happily stuffing their faces with hot dogs. It shows just how little credit advertisers give the public: they assume that if they tell you what you’re looking at you wont actually see what you’re looking at.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 9:24 pm 
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I like what he has to say about these motivational posters. I didn't appreciate the "crazy eyed hobo" comment, but the rest was good.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 9:50 pm 
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Jean, thank you for pointing that out. There isn't any reason to resort to stereotypes about anyone for jokes. Its pretty crappy.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Mon Sep 16, 2013 1:51 pm 
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Not sure whether it's been posted somewhere here already but I thought this was an entertaining satire of those fitspiration images:

http://imgur.com/a/y1iOs


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Mon Sep 16, 2013 3:31 pm 
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annak wrote:
Not sure whether it's been posted somewhere here already but I thought this was an entertaining satire of those fitspiration images:

http://imgur.com/a/y1iOs


In addition to being funny, I think they really aptly highlight why the language in the 'fitspiration' is so problematic and enabling.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Thu Sep 19, 2013 11:24 pm 
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Aaand get your bingo cards ready everyone, it's "regular people" day on Project Runway! (I'm on the West Coast so just starting it now...)


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Fri Sep 20, 2013 12:41 am 
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annak wrote:
Aaand get your bingo cards ready everyone, it's "regular people" day on Project Runway! (I'm on the West Coast so just starting it now...)


Yeah, that's always a nightmare. I'm a few weeks behind on PR, though, so I'm going to preemptively request that no spoilers be posted here.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Mon Oct 07, 2013 5:43 pm 
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http://pitchfork.com/features/update/92 ... ona-apple/

This made me really sad.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Mon Oct 07, 2013 6:29 pm 
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jordanpattern wrote:
http://pitchfork.com/features/update/9234-update-fiona-apple/

This made me really sad.


Agreed, I read about that and was baffled. Why would someone go see an artist they liked just to heckle them about their appearance? That's such a shitty thing to do to anybody, but especially someone who is giving you the gift of their performance and their talent and in doing so has really opened herself, emotionally. I did like this quote from her though:

Quote:
I have every right to do everything I’ve ever done. I stand by everything I’ve ever said, apologies included.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Mon Oct 07, 2013 7:27 pm 
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jordanpattern wrote:
http://pitchfork.com/features/update/9234-update-fiona-apple/

This made me really sad.

fiona apple wrote:
Am I supposed to stop in the middle of my show and have a conversation with you about what I look like? What is the next line in this conversation that you have written in your head, lady?

I've often asked myself "what's the next line in your conversation supposed to be?" about dumb remarks other folks make, you know, if you follow their script. I've always personally wondered where they're coming from because that's not my own instinct, to make someone uncomfortable like such a comment would, which is clear to me. Perhaps it's not clear to them? Do they not even realize they're asking a question that's uncomfortable? I question the heckler/asker's self-awareness and their social awareness in some cases. It's possible they don't even realize they've said something wrong because it's okay and sadly normal and acceptable to speculate openly on a woman's body in our culture. Yeah, it's sad. I'm fine with FA kicking folks who distract her in her workplace out. She needs to be in a zone to perform and if there's someone in the audience who she feels doesn't deserve that gift and is going to throw her off, then adios. <3 Fiona.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Mon Oct 07, 2013 8:32 pm 
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seitanicverses wrote:
jordanpattern wrote:
http://pitchfork.com/features/update/9234-update-fiona-apple/

This made me really sad.
Erika Soyf*cker wrote:
Agreed, I read about that and was baffled. Why would someone go see an artist they liked just to heckle them about their appearance? That's such a shitty thing to do to anybody, but especially someone who is giving you the gift of their performance and their talent and in doing so has really opened herself, emotionally. I did like this quote from her though:
Quote:
I have every right to do everything I’ve ever done. I stand by everything I’ve ever said, apologies included.

fiona apple wrote:
Am I supposed to stop in the middle of my show and have a conversation with you about what I look like? What is the next line in this conversation that you have written in your head, lady?

I've often asked myself "what's the next line in your conversation supposed to be?" about dumb remarks other folks make, you know, if you follow their script. I've always personally wondered where they're coming from because that's not my own instinct, to make someone uncomfortable like such a comment would, which is clear to me. Perhaps it's not clear to them? Do they not even realize they're asking a question that's uncomfortable? I question the heckler/asker's self-awareness and their social awareness in some cases. It's possible they don't even realize they've said something wrong because it's okay and sadly normal and acceptable to speculate openly on a woman's body in our culture. Yeah, it's sad. I'm fine with FA kicking folks who distract her in her workplace out. She needs to be in a zone to perform and if there's someone in the audience who she feels doesn't deserve that gift and is going to throw her off, then adios. <3 Fiona.
All of this. What exactly then hell could that person possibly have hoped to accomplish by doing that? In what universe could an outburst like that have led to any kind of productive, positive, or useful discourse? The woman is there to play music, not answer inappropriate, intrusive, and irrelevant personal questions from complete strangers (who also happen to be unbelievably rude). F*ck that shiitake. I hope she refunded the price of that person's ticket because really, who needs that?

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Tue Oct 08, 2013 10:43 am 
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Yeah, I saw that, too. It just made me really sad, because Fiona Apple seems like a gentle soul, and I hate to think about her hurting. But yes, pointless and rude to the max.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Tue Oct 08, 2013 10:48 am 
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I really liked this, I can relate to it a lot.
http://www.xojane.com/issues/how-not-to ... m=facebook

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Tue Oct 08, 2013 11:00 am 
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paprikapapaya wrote:
I really liked this, I can relate to it a lot.
http://www.xojane.com/issues/how-not-to ... m=facebook


I've read this before, and it actually helped me a lot! Especially number 1, "Don't tell me I'm not fat." I hate to hear friends disparage themselves, but this broadened my perspective in that fat doesn't have to be a bad word, and maybe the person isn't disparaging himself/herself.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Tue Oct 08, 2013 1:05 pm 
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You know what's rude? Asking someone about their scars. If I want to share how I got them I will but asking just makes me self conscious.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Tue Oct 08, 2013 1:23 pm 
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paprikapapaya wrote:
I really liked this, I can relate to it a lot.
http://www.xojane.com/issues/how-not-to ... m=facebook


Wow that's a great article - thank you for posting!

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Tue Oct 08, 2013 3:14 pm 
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blondiefk wrote:
You know what's rude? Asking someone about their scars. If I want to share how I got them I will but asking just makes me self conscious.


OMG I got this at a bike race this weekend. I have a bunch of scars on my legs because I had a very difficult time as a teenager and was a self harmer. They're not insanely eye catching, but you can definitely see them. This weekend some dude came up to me while I was cooling down at my team tent after my race and doesn't even say hi or introduce himself. He just comes up, staring at my legs, and says, "where did you get those scars?" I gave him a second to maybe realize he was being INSANELY RUDE, and when he didn't, I looked him in the eye and, firmly, said, "I'd rather not discuss it." I figured he'd be sheepish and apologetic, and realize he'd obviously stepped where he had no business stepping, but NO! He keeps going, saying "I noticed your tattoos, and then I noticed the scars and just thought, "where did they come from!?" I was actually dumbstruck for a couple seconds before saying, "Yeah, I'd really rather not discuss it." and full on turning away from him. What in the actual fork? How does a grown person think that's okay?

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