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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Fri Oct 18, 2013 7:04 am 
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I love you guys. It's 2pm and I'm leaving work to go pet my dog. What's your excuse?!


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Fri Oct 18, 2013 7:26 am 
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aelle wrote:
I love you guys. It's 2pm and I'm leaving work to go pet my dog. What's your excuse?!
You go, girl! But seriously - I don't know if you noticed that I posted about this upthread; if so, apologies for repeating myself.
Desdemona wrote:
I wasn't sure whether to put this here or in the "what hurts your feminism?" thread, since it kind of belongs in both. But anyway, I find this kind of sh*t really annoying - if some women want to spend a lot of time and effort post-partum on working out, returning to a certain size, looking a particular way, etc., that's obviously their right and their business. But it's not their business to criticize and shame women who make different choices, or imply that those women need an "excuse" for having interests or priorities that lie elsewhere, to say nothing of demands on their time and commitments that don't necessarily include spending every day at the gym. It puts me in mind of Gwyneth Paltrow blathering about how "all mothers" should be able to exercise for two hours a day...which is apparently how things work on her home planet.)

That said, it's also no one's business to tell this woman that she shouldn't spend so much time working out or whatever, and for the record, I also find the "hot mom" designation in the headline below pretty obnoxious; I just copied the link from the STFU Parents FB page, where I first saw this story, because I couldn't be arsed to look it up anywhere else. Why can't we just leave women's bodies - pregnant, postpartum, and everywhere else - the hell alone?? GAAAH.

http://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/hot-mo ... 49769.html
Tofulish wrote:
Yes, I think the part that made it offensive was the "What's Your Excuse" part, because it makes you feel like you need an excuse to not look like as great as she does. If she can look that amazing with just an hour workout a day (30 mins weights and 30 mins cardio), then more power to her. I don't think she deserves to be shamed for looking amazing, if that is what is important to her, but I also wish she wasn't shaming people who don't look the same as she does. And the non-apology was kind of horrible. I just wish we had a lot more tolerance for the range of bodies we all have. I love my body, and I don't need an excuse for it.
Desdemona wrote:
But even saying that she looks "amazing" reifies the idea that there are certain ways of looking that are better or worse (or more "amazing," whatever that means; if she had antlers or wings that would be "amazing," but does wearing a certain size deserve that qualifier?) than others. If that's what she wants to do and how she wants to look and what she wants to spend her time on, cool. More power to her. But the assumption that artificially constructed cultural and aesthetic ideals - which history demonstrates are extremely fluid - constitute what's acceptable/admirable/valorized/insert judgmental adjective just rubs me all the wrong ways. I mean, isn't it just possible that according to some equally artificial cultural ideal this women is "ugly," "unattractive," or whatever? And isn't that just as forked up? It hurts me to see women reinforcing and ratifying the very images that do so much damage to us, and continue to make us waste so much time and energy on the size of our butts instead of doing something meaningful and useful.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Fri Oct 18, 2013 8:02 am 
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Oh how dumb - I think I saw your original post, but as the actual meme hadn't made it on my FB until today I didn't realize we were talking about the same thing.


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Fri Oct 18, 2013 9:10 am 
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Not sure if there is a right thread for this, but this comic made me laugh. WARNING for gore.

http://egalitariste.tumblr.com/post/640 ... unexpected


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Fri Oct 18, 2013 11:37 am 
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aelle wrote:
I love you guys. It's 2pm and I'm leaving work to go pet my dog. What's your excuse?!

Seriously. You guys made me laugh so hard just now reading this thread. <3

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Fri Oct 18, 2013 8:13 pm 
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seitanicverses wrote:
aelle wrote:
I love you guys. It's 2pm and I'm leaving work to go pet my dog. What's your excuse?!

Seriously. You guys made me laugh so hard just now reading this thread. <3
Here I am, back home in my pajamas, drinking wine and eating pasta with my partner and my dog. What's your excuse?

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Fri Oct 18, 2013 9:26 pm 
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I rode my bike a whole bunch of miles, ate two lunches worth of food and dessert from Veggie Grill, and have watched roughly 800 episodes of Scandal. What's your excuse?

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Oct 19, 2013 8:13 am 
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Desdemona wrote:
seitanicverses wrote:
aelle wrote:
I love you guys. It's 2pm and I'm leaving work to go pet my dog. What's your excuse?!

Seriously. You guys made me laugh so hard just now reading this thread. <3
Here I am, back home in my pajamas, drinking wine and eating pasta with my partner and my dog. What's your excuse?

i ALMOST posted a picture of myself wearing my chicken apron over my pajamas, working and drinking beer, what's your excuse? on my FB and then realized if any of my colleagues saw it I would be permanently unemployable, so I decided not to. BUT I WAS THINKING OF YOU!

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Oct 19, 2013 10:24 am 
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So post it here instead! :)

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Oct 19, 2013 12:08 pm 
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zelavie wrote:
torque wrote:
I ALMOST posted a picture of myself wearing my chicken apron over my pajamas, working and drinking beer, what's your excuse? on my FB and then realized if any of my colleagues saw it I would be permanently unemployable, so I decided not to. BUT I WAS THINKING OF YOU!
So post it here instead! :)
Yes, please!!!

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Oct 19, 2013 4:11 pm 
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A website called "Return Of Kings - for masculine men" announced the week commencing October 7th as 'Fat Shaming Week'. I didn't notice it happen at the time but it looks as though it took place on Twitter. I've spoilered a paragraph from the 'promotional' page as it's mind-bogglingly enraging.

Spoiler: show
Quote:
...we are proud to announce this week as Fat Shaming Week. For the next seven days, we will promote a culture of fat shaming. The brightest masculine minds are currently at work to bring you a delicious buffet of fat shaming analysis and literature. During fat shaming week, I implore you not to whine and nag about wanting a wider selection of posting matter. If you don’t like fat shaming—and we don’t see why that would be the case—come back next Monday when we return to our regular program. We have decided as a group that fat shaming is essential in creating a society of thin, beautiful women who are ashamed for being ugly. Let the fat shaming begin!


I think I only scratched the surface with this over-used chemical toilet of an article. The site gets worse and worse the deeper you delve.


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Mon Oct 21, 2013 11:27 am 
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I've never been particularly comfortable with PETA's style of campaigning, but seeing this today has pushed me over the edge into anger: http://www.peta.org.au/news-release/pet ... -epidemic/

Quote:
PETA SENDS TASMANIA’S FATTEST TOWN EMERGENCY VEGAN KIT TO TACKLE OBESITY EPIDEMIC

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) Australia has sent a letter to the mayor of Dorset – the state’s fattest region – suggesting that he recommend a plant-based diet as an emergency measure to tackle the community’s obesity problems. According to a recent study, Dorset is one of the nation’s most obese areas. The group’s vegetarian/vegan starter kit accompanied the letter with tips to make the transition. PETA’s point? That a meat- and dairy-based diet increases the risk of developing a host of life-threatening ailments, including obesity. [...]

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Mon Oct 21, 2013 11:33 am 
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Also, I loved this summary from: http://www.xojane.com/issues/whats-wrong-fat-shaming

Quote:
If we want to stand in opposition to fat-shaming, we only need remember a few points:

    You can’t tell how healthy someone is just by looking at them.
    You can’t tell how much someone eats or exercises just by looking at them.
    Even if you could, it’s none of your business anyway.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 23, 2013 1:42 pm 
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Tofulish wrote:
fat-shaming douche wrote:
hook-up effects of chocolate.


I tend to hook up with people who give me chocolate, but I fail to see how this is a bad thing.


...and I have a sig

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 1:54 pm 
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Well, this sure takes the baby donut.

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nati ... r/3312537/


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 2:00 pm 
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I thought this was going to be about Desdemona's favorite Fall treats.

Kidding aside, I cannot imagine an adult thinking that its okay to fat shame someone else's kid. It crosses that unspoken rule among adults, that unless there is a dangerous situation, you leave parenting to parents. Of course, it is horrible to shame anyone, but shaming a kid is terrible. Like kids don't get a loud enough message that its not okay to be fat once you're no longer an infant ever.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 2:32 pm 
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Her house should be boycotted for Halloween and picketed with signs "We don't want your damn candy." I read the article and it looks like...someone actually agrees with her? Calling it a tough love letter? Argh.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 2:32 pm 
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Yeah, I mean besides the totally astonishing rudeness of this, what I don't get is: does she really think these kids don't know they're fat?

Because when I was a kid, and I really doubt much has changed, kids were kept very much up to date on all their perceived physical shortcomings.


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 2:36 pm 
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annak wrote:
Yeah, I mean besides the totally astonishing rudeness of this, what I don't get is: does she really think these kids don't know they're fat?

Because when I was a kid, and I really doubt much has changed, kids were kept very much up to date on all their perceived physical shortcomings.

Jesus H. Christ YES. So many adults told me what I looked like (in unflattering terms) when I was a kid. So many. I ask myself today "what the hell was wrong with them?" I certainly don't think "wow, they did me a favor."

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 2:51 pm 
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Yeah, I don't know what flummoxes me most (fortunately, I don't have to choose) about this person. Her unbelievable arrogance in presuming to comment on other people's children or parenting? Her obliviousness and/or lack of compassion in imagining that publicly shaming a person of any age - especially a child - could produce anything but painful, negative consequences? Her apparent delusion that this is in any way acceptable behavior? Because telling people they're lousy, irresponsible parents is always an effective way to promote change, right? And it's super nice and neighborly, too! I mean, if she's so bent out of shape about other people's objectionable sizes and snacking habits, why not just skip the whole thing? Don't buy any candy, and switch off the damned porch light.

In any case, somehow I'm doubting her fellow "villagers" will be overwhelmed by her "helpful concern" in quite the way she imagines.

Image

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 3:11 pm 
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I wonder if, when she gave that radio interview, she realized she'd be the most hated woman in America within hours?

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 4:22 pm 
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seitanicverses wrote:
Her house should be boycotted for Halloween and picketed with signs "We don't want your damn candy." I read the article and it looks like...someone actually agrees with her? Calling it a tough love letter? Argh.


Yeah, uh, his metaphors are sort of out of control.


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 4:29 pm 
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This is why I give out tasty, healthy stuff at school. Not to be the food police, but because kids always have piles of total crepe from vending.

So I give out Annie's crackers, etc. I have wrapped bat shaped pretzels for Halloween. (yay, Costco)

The kids enjoy the change from the sugary or super salty stuff at vending.

This woman is just a bisque. If she cared about good nutrition, she would simply give everybody tasty healthier stuff.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 4:38 pm 
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Lavawitch, the year before last when we actually had a ton of trick-or-treaters, the kids were super excited - a few even said All right, healthy treats! I had been worried about it! I mean, I wasn't giving out bran muffins but I was giving out dark chocolates, the Annie's fruit bunnies, &c.

I always buy too many treats because I get too excited at the prospect of having trick-or-treaters though. We moved and last year we had...one.


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 5:22 pm 
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lavawitch wrote:
This is why I give out tasty, healthy stuff at school. Not to be the food police, but because kids always have piles of total crepe from vending.

So I give out Annie's crackers, etc. I have wrapped bat shaped pretzels for Halloween. (yay, Costco)

The kids enjoy the change from the sugary or super salty stuff at vending.

This woman is just a bisque. If she cared about good nutrition, she would simply give everybody tasty healthier stuff.
Love the bat-shaped pretzel idea! When my kids were small, there was a woman in our neighborhood who gave out juice boxes. Which was awesome because with all that trick-or-treating, people get thirsty!

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