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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Thu Nov 14, 2013 10:08 pm 
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***LIES!!!***
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Double whammy that that anecdote appears in a history of feminism.


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 10:42 am 
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The posts in the Facebook Awkwardness thread about women saying that if they participated in no shave November that their pants wouldn't zip up reminded me of a weird shaming situation that happened around me a few months ago. I was at a bar watching football with T and a group of his friends. One of the girls was talking about how she was totally grossed out by seeing a pube in a bathroom somewhere because 'who even has pubes anymore?' And then they went on and on about how women need to 'take care of their shiitake', laughing about the utter ridiculousness of the possibility of having a bush in this day and age.

Um, I have a bush. It's, like, zero maintenance and (not that it matters, but it's a bonus) my dude is a fan of it. I hate this idea that all women need to shave their pubic hair or they'll be labelled gross or...what? Unfashionable? I mean, I used to shave mine and it was no big deal, but I like having hair down there better. Does anyone actually care about this, outside of their own preference and possibly the preference of their sexual partner? At any rate, my guy and I just remained silent throughout this yuk fest. I don't feel like it's anyone's business what my pubic hair situation is, and saying something would have just been awkward and not really worth it. It was just super stupid.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 11:31 am 
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Totally been there. Like the weird social situation where people are talking about how gross pubes are while I'm sitting there with pubes. It's bizarre. Honestly it just made me feel bad for them. When I was a teenager I groomed based on shame and it was just so much work to be that hard on myself. What if I miss a spot? What if I want to wear shorts and I haven't shaved my legs that day? What if we go swimming and my bikini line has bumps?? What if what if what if. It's so much easier to say I'll shave what I feel like shaving whenever I feel like it.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 11:34 am 
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I shaved my beej in high school, long before I had sex with another person because I was told that no boy would ever date a girl with pubes and...believed it, I guess. I think I did it once and thought "fork that was a lot of work." And then I forgot about it because I think bushes are kind of awesome and I can remember feeling very grown up when mine sprouted. And then there was the fateful time I decided to wax it as an adult, just to see what it was like, and had literally every single thing go catastrophically wrong.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 2:39 pm 
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I am intrigued that people sit around and talk about how gross pubic hair is. Next time tell them to stop being tools of the patriarchy who make women feel shame about their bodies. When they call you a man hating feminist hop up on the bar/table/chair/gazebo and sing Hair at the top of your lungs with a final cry of "Pube Strong". Sit and say that you've now taken care of your shiitake.

Shining streaming gleaming flaxen waxen

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 2:51 pm 
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panda is wise. (and awesome.)

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 3:02 pm 
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pandacookie wrote:
I am intrigued that people sit around and talk about how gross pubic hair is. Next time tell them to stop being tools of the patriarchy who make women feel shame about their bodies. When they call you a man hating feminist hop up on the bar/table/chair/gazebo and sing Hair at the top of your lungs with a final cry of "Pube Strong". Sit and say that you've now taken care of your shiitake.

Shining streaming gleaming flaxen waxen

I like the way you think.

I haven't gotten to the singing-on-the-table part but I have (many, many, many times) gotten to the "stare blankly at you" phase. That's my favourite.

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"I'd rather have dried catshit! I'd rather have astroturf! I'd rather have an igloo!"~Isa

"But really, anyone willing to dangle their baby in front of a crocodile is A-OK in my book."~SSD


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 5:14 pm 
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I liked this piece about thin privilege. It really puts to rest this idea that thin folk can possibly have it as hard as fat folk. Not that anyone is really keeping tally, but I've heard some annoying things lately about how we need to include thin people in the conversation about fatphobia. No, we don't.
http://everydayfeminism.com/2013/10/let ... -privilege

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 5:18 pm 
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That is a good article.

I think pretty anybody who has existed on both ends of spectrum will say that life as a thin person is overall better, and not just because of things like fitting into the tiny chairs with attached desks at school.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 5:55 pm 
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Those attached desks just need to get burned in a fire (my husband's a lefty and I am a person who likes to put the *entire* piece of paper on my desk, so we have passionate feelings in this household about them ;) ).

Bizarre pubic hair prescriptivism was one of the reasons my book club panned that Caitlin Moran book. I've seen the discussion go the other way as well (implying that anyone who prefers waxing or whatever clearly is capitulating to porn-dictated aesthetic tastes or wants to look "like a child"). Eh, it's hair. Can't be bothered to care.


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 6:25 pm 
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I was fat AND a lefty.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 6:31 pm 
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I currently DO dare to be fat and a lefty! Burn me; I'm a witch!

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Did you notice the slight feeling of panic at the words "Chicken Basin Street"? Like someone was walking over your grave? Try not to remember. We must never remember. - mumbles
Is this about devilberries and nazifruit again? - footface


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 6:51 pm 
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Paprikapapaya, I really like that article! I like the grievance versus oppression structure a lot. Often when I post about how hard it is to be shamed for being dark skinned, people who are pale will say that they were made fun of as well, and while I agree that its not fair to mock anyone for their skin-tone, there is a difference between that grievance and oppression, for all the reasons set forth in that article. Thanks for sharing!

And I think from now on a full bush should be known as Pandascaping.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 11:05 pm 
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Well, Caitlin Moran was speaking using her own reference point for what is sexism - "Are men worrying about this?"

"I can't believe we've got to a point where it's basically costing us money to have a vagina. They're making us pay for maintenance and upkeep of our lulus, like they're a communal garden. It's a stealth tax. "

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 16, 2013 11:14 pm 
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Semen Strong
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Welp, I refuse to pay that tax. My community garden is a shamble, ya heard?

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But on a cold winter night, when the wind whispers through the trees and a bright, white moon hangs heavy in the air, you might hear a sad cry like someone thinking he knows what's best for you, and that'll be the white man a-passin' you by. just mumbles


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Nov 17, 2013 10:27 am 
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Tofulish wrote:
And I think from now on a full bush should be known as Pandascaping.

O_____o

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"But really, anyone willing to dangle their baby in front of a crocodile is A-OK in my book."~SSD


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Nov 17, 2013 10:37 am 
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Tofulish wrote:
Welp, I refuse to pay that tax. My community garden is a shamble, ya heard?


There's nothing quite like divorcing a Brazilian for making a person want to grow a big bush.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Nov 17, 2013 10:41 am 
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BAHAHAHAHA! NDP, you are wonderful and hilarious. I am sorry things are hard for you at the moment, but I know you're going to be alright <3 Let the big bush of healing commence!

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But on a cold winter night, when the wind whispers through the trees and a bright, white moon hangs heavy in the air, you might hear a sad cry like someone thinking he knows what's best for you, and that'll be the white man a-passin' you by. just mumbles


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Nov 17, 2013 11:56 am 
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To paraphrase Michael Stipe, unless you are sitting naked on someone's lap, why does it matter? When did it become a thing to know what someone else did down there or to shame them for not removing all of their pubic hair?

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A whole lot of access and privilege goes into being sanctimonious pricks J-Dub
Dessert is currently a big bowl of sanctimonious, passive aggressive vegan enduced boak. Fezza
You people are way less funny than Pandacookie. Sucks to be you.-interrobang?!


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Nov 17, 2013 12:20 pm 
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The biggest thing I hear that aggravates me is people talking about "well you have to keep it neat/trimmed/shaped" and I'm like...no you don't? I mean you may, but I don't have to keep clean lines in my pubes for any reason. It's not like its unsanitary to have a hairy bikini line, but people talk about it like you're letting your lawn get overgrown and it'll harbor mosquitos and fleas.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Nov 17, 2013 12:35 pm 
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Yes, as long as you don't have mats, it really doesn't affect health.

But this thread is making me think of this:
Image

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But on a cold winter night, when the wind whispers through the trees and a bright, white moon hangs heavy in the air, you might hear a sad cry like someone thinking he knows what's best for you, and that'll be the white man a-passin' you by. just mumbles


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Nov 17, 2013 12:44 pm 
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My friend was told by a gynecologist it was more hygienic ton shave your pubic hair. I told her she needed a new gynecologist.

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Nov 17, 2013 1:56 pm 
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Did you guys hear about the woman who was banned from Instagram because she posted a bikini picture with a bit of pubic hair visible?

Why Instagram Censored My Body

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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Nov 17, 2013 3:22 pm 
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Only slightly tangential to the Instagram story, but has anyone else had really weird experiences with the "this picture might not be for all audiences" auto filter on Twitter? For me it's never caught any actual NFSW content, but 90% of what it filters is pictures with people of color o____o


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 Post subject: Re: Had enough of body shaming?
PostPosted: Sun Nov 17, 2013 3:24 pm 
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Yeah, I have shaved entirely once for my high school boyfriend. I told him he was a moron and grew it back out and, since then, any guy who has made a comment on it gets a side-eye and the comment, "Yeah, because ingrown hairs are so forking sexy." It shuts them up right quick.

Note that I have very sensitive skin to begin with.

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