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 Post subject: Election and Equal Rights for Same Sex Couples
PostPosted: Sat Oct 27, 2012 5:21 pm 
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Semen Strong
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There have been so many posts on FB from our LGBT friends that one crucial difference between the two parties is their stance on same sex marriages.

I just wanted to share a very personal and amazing one, with all personal info redacted.

Quote:
It is important that you read this, this is not a re-post, this is personal.

Wanted to share with my friends and family what this election means to our family. As most of you know, C. and I met on a cruise in 19xx, our children were born in 20xx, we were married in Toronto in 200x, and we have a pretty cool family. We take our kids to soccer games, go camping in the summer, hang out at the town pool as often as we can, ice skate in the winter, ski if there is enough snow, go to church on Sundays (where C and I have even started teaching Sunday school!). We made a decision when the kids were born that I would work and that C would stay home and take care of our children for as long as she possibly could. We believed and continue to believe that that provides the best upbringing for our children. Yes, we are rather traditional!
What you may not know is that when C gave birth to A and B, I had no parental rights and was legally a stranger to my children. So we did a second-parent adoption – something that New York State has allowed for some time, so that children can maintain their biological parent and add an adoptive parent. After the adoption, our kids’ birth certificates were amended and my name was added as a parent.

That enabled me to pick our children up from school, participate in parent-teacher conferences, take them to the Doctor, just to name a very few examples of the things that a parent does, but strangers do not. It also allowed me to add them to my health insurance policy ensuring that they could get decent and affordable healthcare and stay healthy (thank God).

In 200x C and I were married in Toronto. New York State recognized out-of-state marriages before it actually allowed them in New York so our marriage further solidified the legal status of our family. C and I have mutual hospital visitation rights, she participates on my employee benefits as a spouse, and she is able to have health insurance under my company plan, to name a few of the State benefits that marriage provides.

We’ve come a long way but we are not there yet. The Federal Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) prohibits the federal government from recognizing our marriage and our family. So we pay thousands (I mean thousands) of dollars more every year in federal income taxes than a comparable heterosexual couple does, and C is not entitled to a penny of my hard-earned Social Security payments when I die.

So I turn to the presidential election. One of the candidates running for President has vowed to support a constitutional amendment outlawing our marriage, and in effect, our family. Some of you may say so what, we still have a loving family and always will, what does it matter that we cannot be married. It matters. A lot. This is not symbolism. This is my family’s health, my children’s education, our ability to retire and not be impoverished. This is about our ability to live.

If our marriage is outlawed, here’s what happens: I would likely lose my parental rights, leaving our children uninsured, and me out in the cold with respect to their education; C would lose her health insurance and other benefits provided by my employer; we would pay much more in State income taxes; C and I would not be able to visit each other in the hospital; if C were to pre-decease me, I could lose my kids entirely. Then what? Hope that somehow this wouldn’t be our reality? These are just a few of the more obvious impacts of the loss of our marriage, the loss of my family.

We still have a long fight for the civil rights of our relationship and our family. We must see DOMA overturned, as President Obama has vowed to do, so that we are able to enjoy the full marriage rights that we are entitled to including Social Security and paying our fair share of federal income taxes. Now is not the time to go backwards.

So you can see that I am not being over-dramatic when I say that a vote for Romney for President is a vote to destroy my family, not symbolically, but literally. I urge you to think about A,B, C and me when you cast your vote. Cast your vote with your eyes wide open.
Love to you all.


This really brought home for me how important this issue is. And how incredibly ignorant and/or privileged it is to say that there are no differences between the two parties. There are huge differences, including this one.

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 Post subject: Re: Election and Equal Rights for Same Sex Couples
PostPosted: Sat Oct 27, 2012 6:06 pm 
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It is brilliantly well put.

It was driven home for me when my out daughter came to me one day and said all she wanted was to have the option to get married one day (when she is old enough). She understands just how second class some people see her as. She is fifteen. She should not ever have to feel that way. NO ONE SHOULD.

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 Post subject: Re: Election and Equal Rights for Same Sex Couples
PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 2:47 am 
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I think it's strange how it gets touted out how "economically" the Republicans are better.

Seems like a misuse of government money to me to be concerned with who's sleeping with who.

And yes, I fail to see how the parties are "all the same". I've carefully looked at many candidates and can't find a single one like the other..

(I'm for LGBTQ rights, it's one of my "no compromise" issues)

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 Post subject: Re: Election and Equal Rights for Same Sex Couples
PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 3:13 am 
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Shanti wrote:
I think it's strange how it gets touted out how "economically" the Republicans are better.

Especially, since it can be shown again and again that they aren't economically better using what happens in the world when we use republican ideas and what has happened throughout history or even what happens in the US.

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 Post subject: Re: Election and Equal Rights for Same Sex Couples
PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 6:49 am 
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I saw for the first time a couple anti question 6 signs yesterday. They were near Walmart. A lot of the focus in Maryland seems to be against expanding gambling so I'm hoping question 6 passes under the radar.

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 Post subject: Re: Election and Equal Rights for Same Sex Couples
PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 9:45 am 
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Top of the food chain & doesn't need to prove it
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linanil wrote:
I saw for the first time a couple anti question 6 signs yesterday. They were near Walmart. A lot of the focus in Maryland seems to be against expanding gambling so I'm hoping question 6 passes under the radar.


I went to early voting in Upper Marlboro yesterday (4 hours in line in the cold drizzle, still worth it). Driving up to the lot where we had to park there were a bunch of the yes on 6 signs. Once I got out of the car and walked under route 4 to the voting center I think I only passed one or two more, except for the signs that suggested saying yes to all 7 referendums, the rest of the signs on the way to the building were all no on 6. One said something about "no gay marriage, no marriage equality" and one third line I can't remember and another was the standard "don't redefine marriage". One person was handing out photocopies of a channel 4 news story that talked about President Obama endorsing same sex marriage in Maryland so hopefully that helped solidify a few votes for marriage equality.

The question 7 seemed pretty equally representative, all the "vote no on question 7" signs had at least one "vote yes on question 7" sign placed about a foot in front of it.

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 Post subject: Re: Election and Equal Rights for Same Sex Couples
PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 10:59 am 
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alden wrote:
linanil wrote:
I saw for the first time a couple anti question 6 signs yesterday. They were near Walmart. A lot of the focus in Maryland seems to be against expanding gambling so I'm hoping question 6 passes under the radar.


I went to early voting in Upper Marlboro yesterday (4 hours in line in the cold drizzle, still worth it). Driving up to the lot where we had to park there were a bunch of the yes on 6 signs. Once I got out of the car and walked under route 4 to the voting center I think I only passed one or two more, except for the signs that suggested saying yes to all 7 referendums, the rest of the signs on the way to the building were all no on 6. One said something about "no gay marriage, no marriage equality" and one third line I can't remember and another was the standard "don't redefine marriage". One person was handing out photocopies of a channel 4 news story that talked about President Obama endorsing same sex marriage in Maryland so hopefully that helped solidify a few votes for marriage equality.

The question 7 seemed pretty equally representative, all the "vote no on question 7" signs had at least one "vote yes on question 7" sign placed about a foot in front of it.


I'd hope that people wouldn't say "what did that sign back there say? oh yes, no on 6" and would actually know beforehand. We tried to vote on Saturday but the line was insane (and no parking for blocks despite local school/churches parking lots being packed) so we didn't even go try yesterday. We'll try after the storm. Maybe Thursday.

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 Post subject: Re: Election and Equal Rights for Same Sex Couples
PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 11:14 am 
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And yet the Republican party has the audacity to claim to be for "family values".

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 Post subject: Re: Election and Equal Rights for Same Sex Couples
PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 11:31 am 
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Semen Strong
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Yes, I agree that the GOP is really milking the economy angle to use fear to motivate voters. Someone posted on my FB that "the gays are just going to have to wait because none of us will have any rights if the economy craters." I deleted it because it was too dumb to deal with. First, why does it help the economy to have our government focus on taking away rights from women and LGBT families rather than growing the economy. Second, the policies of the GOP are what took us from Clinton era surplus to deficits. Its as thought Obama rescued a sinking ship, and just as it was righting itself, the former captain that almost ran it aground wants it back, and suggests that the way to save it is by throwing the passengers in steerage overboard. Finally, research shows that economic recovery is all about investor confidence and that the president in power doesn't really affect that. We're going to get 12m new jobs under either Romney or Obama.

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 Post subject: Re: Election and Equal Rights for Same Sex Couples
PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 11:33 am 
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The Republican party will absolutely defend to the death family values. White, Christian, straight family values. There is a Republican vision of a family that resonates strongly with many of its base; dad works, mom stays home and takes care of the house and kids (never born out of wedlock). Mom and dad are female and male, respectively. They all go to a Christian church on major holidays, if not every Sunday. If you never scratch beneath the surface, this is the archetype that the Republican party upholds as the ideal family. This is what they will fight to the death to preserve.


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 Post subject: Re: Election and Equal Rights for Same Sex Couples
PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 11:39 am 
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Semen Strong
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Its also a huge distraction.

If you tell people that "ERMAHGERD FAMILY VALUES ARE UNDER ATTACK" it distracts people from the fact that the GOP has moved us from a system where the rich funded the government by paying taxes instead of by lending money to be repaid with interest, that deregulation is destroying our economy by allowing banks to basically trade for themselves at the expense of their clients and that we are requiring less and less protection for middle class families, by decimating unions etc.

Middle class families are the engine of our economy -they are the people who spend their money in this country on services etc, and keep the system working.

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