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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Thu Jun 16, 2016 10:44 pm 
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Vantine wrote:
An Orthodox Jewish congregation went to a gay bar in NW Washington as an act of solidarity.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/act ... n-orlando/

That's a lovely story.

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 1:50 am 
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Had my first occasion to talk with a straight person face-to-face about this (co-worker, who has no reason - other than my lesbian camp counselor work attire - to know that I'm queer. She was talking to a male coworker who is gay) It was awkward. Like, she was trying to say stuff that was comforting or compassionate, and it was just off (like talking about how when people said this guy was homophobic, she KNEW he was just closeted) The queer coworker and I were just looking at the table and occasionally looking at each other, like "Save me."

Some of the BS she was saying really also exemplified something a good friend of mine and I were talking about the night before. That is, there seems to be a lot of bi-phobia/bi-erasure going on in news coverage since it came out that the killer might have used grindr, gone to gay bars, etc. For example, Wednesday morning on NPR (which I think has been over all doing a good job) a reporter literally said "Lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender" in one sentence, then went on to talk about the fact that he had a wife and was maybe cruising for dudes as if the two things were totally paradoxical. I was just like, "Come on! There is a name (actually several) for people who are attracted to more than one gender, and YOU JUST SAID IT. We don't put the B (and the Q) in there just because they're nice letters to balance things out! We forking exist!" But more importantly, there's just that gross old fashioned narrative that bisexual people (men in particular) are dangerous, duplicitous and not to be trusted. I mean, I feel a little petty typing this out, because the friend and I who were talking about this are both white queers who have some degree of passing privilege, and there are a lot of folks in queer community - namely queer men of color and Latinx folks generally - who are probably hurting a hell of a lot more. But still, it sucks and it feels really bad right now.


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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 6:05 am 
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Well we'll never know, unless his wife says something, about whether he was bisexual or not. It is in the realm of possibilities but also the fact that if you belong to a religion/family/society where being gay is not acceptable, then you might try to go along with the norm including marry someone to keep up the facade.

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 8:29 am 
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Yeah, my point is not: what is his sexual orientation? Rather, the default tone for talking about bisexuality is shitty.


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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 10:32 am 
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I completely understand and obviously many people don't understand how sexual attraction can be a spectrum rather than either or.

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 11:05 am 
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Olives, thank you for bringing that up. I admit that my first assumption about a man who is married to a woman, but trying to have sex with other men is that he is a closeted gay dude. Part of that is societal, and part is based on people I know in real life. But of course that doesn't mean it's true for all people, and it's good to have my assumptions challenged and to have to rethink things.


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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 1:38 pm 
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This is uniquely wonderful- a vigil in London turned into a vogue-off.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/orl ... fe5143c03b

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 2:16 pm 
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matwinser wrote:
Right? And I think someone mentioned it upthread (and I do want to be inclusive) but forking hell, hen parties in gay clubs drive me crazy. We are not your accessories.

Mat.

I went dancing the first time in years (at normal gay club times) the night it happened and I was going to say something about that the next day, but then complaining about that seemed whiny when people died.

Though I can understand them wanting to not have to deal with men hitting on them, which I suspect is part of it.

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 2:26 pm 
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So, I recently started a new job (3 weeks ago) and I am not really out yet. Two of the younger people that I have gone out for beers with know, but that is it. I almost came out, and I know I should right now, more than ever, but I balked. Two people said "what are you doing this weekend?" And I should have answered Pride, and I didn't. I guess this isn't so related to this thread, but like, its a post Pulse world or something.

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 8:00 pm 
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Soccer fans can be pretty misogynistic and homophobic, but I've seen nothing but support since Orlando. Yesterday the national team captain wore this and the game had moments of silence for the tragedy:
Image


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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 9:00 pm 
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I'd like to differentiate a bit between the women's and men's leagues. The NWSL is very queer aware and friendly. We always have rainbow flags at home games and we have a number of out players. And last year a tifo specifically for pride month. The Orlando Pride are doing rainbow t-shirts (100% of profits to local groups) and moments of silence before the games this weekend and various teams have been tweeting support.

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Sat Jun 18, 2016 3:41 pm 
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lycophyte wrote:
matwinser wrote:
Right? And I think someone mentioned it upthread (and I do want to be inclusive) but forking hell, hen parties in gay clubs drive me crazy. We are not your accessories.

Mat.

I went dancing the first time in years (at normal gay club times) the night it happened and I was going to say something about that the next day, but then complaining about that seemed whiny when people died.

Though I can understand them wanting to not have to deal with men hitting on them, which I suspect is part of it.


I totally get women going to gay clubs for the lack of being hit on and feeling safe. I think my thing is specifically hen parties barging in because they think "gays are fun" or some cork. I am even ok with hen parties when maybe the bride has been gone to the club before or been in the community before.

Mat.

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2016 7:00 am 
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Erika Soyf*cker wrote:
This is awesome: Connecticut Senator Chris Murphy began a filibuster on gun control at around 11:20 am, which is still going at 4:20 pm.


Following up on the fillibuster: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/powerpost/wp/2016/06/20/senate-heads-for-gun-control-showdown-likely-to-go-nowhere/

My take...ugh...I should've seen it coming, but the GOP came up with their own bill, so both will go to a vote, neither side will support the other side's bill, and the end result is nothing will get fixed and they will both continue to posture that the other side voted against "sensible gun control"...

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2016 5:41 pm 
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matwinser wrote:

I totally get women going to gay clubs for the lack of being hit on and feeling safe. I think my thing is specifically hen parties barging in because they think "gays are fun" or some cork. I am even ok with hen parties when maybe the bride has been gone to the club before or been in the community before.

Mat.

I was pretty much going to say this exactly.

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2016 7:00 pm 
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alden wrote:
Erika Soyf*cker wrote:
This is awesome: Connecticut Senator Chris Murphy began a filibuster on gun control at around 11:20 am, which is still going at 4:20 pm.


Following up on the fillibuster: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/powerpost/wp/2016/06/20/senate-heads-for-gun-control-showdown-likely-to-go-nowhere/

My take...ugh...I should've seen it coming, but the GOP came up with their own bill, so both will go to a vote, neither side will support the other side's bill, and the end result is nothing will get fixed and they will both continue to posture that the other side voted against "sensible gun control"...


From NBC News:
US Senate blocks all 4 gun control measures brought to vote following Orlando mass shooting terror attack:
-In 1st vote, the US Senate blocks measure to increase funding and resources for national background check system
-In 2nd vote, the US Senate blocks measure expanding national background check system to close “gun show loophole"
-In 3rd vote, the US Senate blocks measure to delay gun purchases for suspected terrorists while seeking court ruling on sale
-In 4th vote, the US Senate blocks measure to prevent individuals on terror watch list from buying gun.

Here's a real article and not my cut/paste from Facebook: http://bigstory.ap.org/e33f665dddeb46ffaaf9f0fa83628bb6

Take a minute and write or call your senators. Either thank them or shame them. My local paper listed how Bill Nelson and Marco Rubio voted. Who wants to call Marco Rubio for me?

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2016 7:06 pm 
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;adsfkjaosdgha;lsdgnalsdf;ADSOLGKAH;LSDHG this is so much bigger and more important than politics and petty infighting! PEOPLE ARE DYING, get over your forking egos and your NRA paydays and do your damn jobs!!!

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2016 8:14 pm 
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I didn't know that one of the MD Senators was part of the filibuster (or maybe both of them did? Mikulski's page said she did). I read an overview of the Republicans proposals and basically they did nothing to change the system. It is definitely frustrating.

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2016 10:42 pm 
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forking politicians. Does anyone know if a particular method of communication has any more weight behind it than another? Like, would a phone call be more or less effective than an email, or no difference? I'm ready to tear Rubio a new one, and just want to do it as productively as possible.

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2016 10:54 pm 
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I remember reading that handwritten letters were given more weight than phone calls, which in turn get more than emails, since emails can be easily copied and pasted. Basically, the more effort a constituent expends, the more difference it makes. I read it years ago though, so I don't know if things have changed.


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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Tue Jun 21, 2016 12:02 am 
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Maybe do all three? I've read that emails get a far faster response - not sure if it being faster really means anything in terms of weight though.

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Tue Jun 21, 2016 8:39 am 
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So can someone seriously get thrown into Guantanamo only on suspicion but in order to be prohibited from buying guns, these republicans want them to have a whole trial and shiitake to prove they shouldn't have guns? I can't even handle this madness anymore.


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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Tue Jun 21, 2016 8:47 am 
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The terror watch list might be unconstitutional so basing a gun ban on it without due process would probably get thrown out by the courts. There's no excuse not to pass universal background checks though.


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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Tue Jun 21, 2016 6:57 pm 
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zelavie wrote:
forking politicians. Does anyone know if a particular method of communication has any more weight behind it than another? Like, would a phone call be more or less effective than an email, or no difference? I'm ready to tear Rubio a new one, and just want to do it as productively as possible.


Did you see he's likely running again?

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Wed Jun 22, 2016 12:14 am 
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Vantine wrote:
zelavie wrote:
forking politicians. Does anyone know if a particular method of communication has any more weight behind it than another? Like, would a phone call be more or less effective than an email, or no difference? I'm ready to tear Rubio a new one, and just want to do it as productively as possible.


Did you see he's likely running again?


Ugh. No, I didn't. And the people in this state will probably just vote him right back in office, too. I mean, if Rick Scott can get re-elected, anyone can.

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 Post subject: Re: Pulse Orlando
PostPosted: Wed Jun 22, 2016 6:48 am 
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I was going to say I could invite y'all to Maryland. We do have a Republican governor although he has had some pretty liberal policies (mandatory birth control coverage!).

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