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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 10:24 am 
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That's so frustrating, Tofulish. It seems like saying "calm down" is one of the first phrases that people go to when interacting with an - let's call it "excited" - woman. If your husband had gone in with Leela and reacted the same way as you did, I am certain he wouldn't have been treated the same way. (I feel like they probably would have taken the situation more seriously, and rushed her in.)


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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 10:57 am 
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flavabean wrote:
That's so frustrating, Tofulish. It seems like saying "calm down" is one of the first phrases that people go to when interacting with an - let's call it "excited" - woman. If your husband had gone in with Leela and reacted the same way as you did, I am certain he wouldn't have been treated the same way. (I feel like they probably would have taken the situation more seriously, and rushed her in.)


So so true.
I have been in situation where I have been calmer than the men around me and still been told to calm down. Me specifically, and not the men.

Because a woman who is voicing anything in a firm and assured way (as it sounds like Tofulish was) is too strong to handle. To threatening. I don't know.

Bottom line... let's stop telling women to calm down. :)

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 11:46 am 
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Yeah, saying 'calm down' to me is like throwing gas on a fire. If I wasn't upset before I sure as hell am after.

That fashion collection - ugh. Mental illness isn't edgy. And I only read one comment that touched upon that aspect. And a collection based on homelessness? Ugh. Just, ugh. As a formerly homeless mentally ill person I am just disgusted.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 12:01 pm 
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I can't tell if this is plain stupidity or sexism but I was standing at work last night in the electronics department, with a sign over my head that said "Electronics," while holding a handful of electronics and a man came over to me and said, "Do you know anything about electronics?"

NO I STAND HERE TO MAKE THIS PLACE LOOK PRETTY

And then this other man kept telling me how beautiful I was and that he's seen me in his dreams and shiitake like that while I'm trying to talk to him about phones.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 6:29 pm 
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Usually my peeps over in the nordic countries keep shiitake pretty tight, so I was pretty disgusted to see this: http://jezebel.com/new-eggs-for-boys-to ... 1292669306

Norway is marketing boy eggs (for blue pirates, arrrgh!) and girl eggs (for pretty pink princesses, ::blush::)! As in chicken eggs, that you buy at the grocery store. As the headline says, I can only pray to our Straight Male God that this ends brunch-based sexual confusion once and for all!

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 5:04 pm 
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Six plus 2 reasons why women shouldn't go to college: http://www.fixthefamily.com/blog/6-reas ... to-college

Read it for the lollers.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 6:36 pm 
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Dude who kept calling "pretty lady! pretty lady!" in the convenience store until I finally looked and saw that he needed me to move so he could get by. Next time, try "excuse me" or even "you're in the way".


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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 6:55 pm 
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mollyjade wrote:
Dude who kept calling "pretty lady! pretty lady!" in the convenience store until I finally looked and saw that he needed me to move so he could get by. Next time, try "excuse me" or even "you're in the way".


This is so stupid it's almost comical.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 7:33 pm 
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I know it's not unique to my university, but I'm so discouraged by all the reports of sexual harassment and assault against women on our campus. It seems like I'm always getting alerts, like "female student tackled to ground while jogging at 8 pm" or "student groped while walking on campus pathway" or "student reported peeping tom in grad student apartment window" or even "student awoke to man who crept through her open bedroom window trying to assault her". I just feel so powerless. There is pretty good security on campus so I don't know what else we can do.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 7:58 pm 
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Its just so scary to deal with street harassment, because you have no idea what people are capable of doing.

A teenager was harassed at her job at a McDonalds, and the harassers ended up throwing a milkshake in her face. Her Dad filed a police report and the police believe the teens shot the whole family in retaliation. They are all expected to survive http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/fam ... -1.1404589

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 11:14 pm 
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Facebook comments by people who are friends of friends.

A man beat his wife with a baseball bat in CT after she asked him for a divorce and I keep seeing comments like "Well, she should have just snuck out of the house with all her things and not told him until she was in safety." I just can't even believe that we blame a victim for thinking that she could end a relationship with a conversation rather than having to leave her home and sneak out with whatever possessions she could grab.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Sep 13, 2013 1:32 am 
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Man shatters woman's jaw after she refuses to dance with him.

Quote:
"Basically it happened after I said I wouldn't dance with a man," Miss Henville said.
"He kept coming after me, and then he poured champagne over me. When I asked him to go away, he did it again. The next thing I knew, he'd come back with the bottle and hit me in the face with it, and it smashed as he did that."
Miss Henshaw's jaw was broken in two places and her face was gashed by the shattered glass.


http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-cambridgeshire-24061765


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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Sep 13, 2013 3:10 am 
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My mother told me she read a study that 1/3 japanese man admitted having "forced" someone sexually.

And I just read this study http://www.vg.no/nyheter/innenriks/arti ... tid=150532 (its in Norwegian) that 1/2 of norwegian men think if women flirted with someone before they got raped it's their own fault.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Sep 13, 2013 4:34 am 
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Tofulish wrote:
Six plus 2 reasons why women shouldn't go to college: http://www.fixthefamily.com/blog/6-reas ... to-college

Read it for the lollers.


I couldn't get past halfway down point 2. I just can't cope with so much insanity.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Sep 13, 2013 8:16 am 
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Erika Soyf*cker wrote:
mollyjade wrote:
Dude who kept calling "pretty lady! pretty lady!" in the convenience store until I finally looked and saw that he needed me to move so he could get by. Next time, try "excuse me" or even "you're in the way".


This is so stupid it's almost comical.
I will confess to laughing pretty hard at this, because I couldn't help picturing the guy as some sort of loud, pesky-but-essentially-harmless cartoon character.

Now THIS, on the other hand...

http://www.wcvb.com/news/local/metro-we ... index.html

I don't even know where the hell to start except to say that maybe this dude and Mrs Hall should board the same rocket and blast off for Planet Slut-Shaming Misogyny.

Oh, and if you want to go for the rage-induced migraine gusto, go ahead and read the comments on on of our local station's FB page. (Don't say you weren't warned!)

https://www.facebook.com/wcvb5?ref=ts&fref=ts

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Sep 13, 2013 8:32 am 
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Frankly, my partner is challenging my feminism. He will shut down any converstation on feminism with a "that is a sweeping statement" or a "that happens to men too". Except, no. And he only does that to feminism comments. If I were talking as excitedly about the situation in Syria or made sweeping statements about anything else, like race, he would not do that.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Sep 13, 2013 8:42 am 
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kfad, I feel the same way about my partner. Except he also does it in regards to racism and other isms, everything priviliged-based really. And when I point it out he denies doing it.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Sep 13, 2013 9:11 am 
Heeeerrrrree's JACKY!
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Last night I called him on it and he started to object. I said, very calmly " No, this is a thing you do." And he said "sorry" in a very mumbled voice and dropped it. I hope my stating it out right will help him see his privilege and help him understand or look to why my talking about it makes him so uncomfortable.

(I know why, he needs to get there on his own)

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Sep 13, 2013 12:44 pm 
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kfad wrote:
Frankly, my partner is challenging my feminism. He will shut down any converstation on feminism with a "that is a sweeping statement" or a "that happens to men too". Except, no. And he only does that to feminism comments. If I were talking as excitedly about the situation in Syria or made sweeping statements about anything else, like race, he would not do that.


This is the first thing that came to mind while reading this. False equivalency like whoa.


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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Sep 13, 2013 1:43 pm 
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"Welcome to the background radiation of my life" - how true. Good comic miharu, thanks for posting the link.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Mon Sep 16, 2013 6:52 pm 
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"... we are NOT saying that sending a girl to college or women working is a sin. But after looking at the issues we raise, we would challenge anyone to convince us that college for girls is not a near occasion of sin."

I think I just had a stroke.

http://www.fixthefamily.com/blog/6-reas ... to-college

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Mon Sep 16, 2013 7:21 pm 
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The comments on that FIX TEH FAMILY blog are the best thing i've read all week. Do read the comments if you sully your eyes with that crapola.

"As a woman, I am now 8% less educated for having read this. Now I have to go find a thesaurus or something."

"I agree that work is below the dignity of women, but I have only daughters....Who should unload the dishwasher?"

"Your comment was like a refreshing glass of lemonade after choking down the crapsmoothie that was this article. "

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Mon Sep 16, 2013 9:04 pm 
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torque wrote:
The comments on that FIX TEH FAMILY blog are the best thing i've read all week. Do read the comments if you sully your eyes with that crapola.

"As a woman, I am now 8% less educated for having read this. Now I have to go find a thesaurus or something."

"I agree that work is below the dignity of women, but I have only daughters....Who should unload the dishwasher?"

"Your comment was like a refreshing glass of lemonade after choking down the crapsmoothie that was this article. "
LOVE.

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Nothing is safe from weiners in my neighborhood... ~ crowderpea
I didn't embarrass him by saying anything about wanking ~ 8ball
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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2013 3:54 am 
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Desdemona wrote:
torque wrote:
The comments on that FIX TEH FAMILY blog are the best thing i've read all week. Do read the comments if you sully your eyes with that crapola.

"As a woman, I am now 8% less educated for having read this. Now I have to go find a thesaurus or something."

"I agree that work is below the dignity of women, but I have only daughters....Who should unload the dishwasher?"

"Your comment was like a refreshing glass of lemonade after choking down the crapsmoothie that was this article. "
LOVE.


+1 YUMMYYYYYYYYYYYY.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2013 12:01 pm 
Seagull of the PPK
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for a moment i thought this was the same blog. then i thought, wait, New Yorker....
http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/c ... m=facebook

[seriously, i agree that business school is a frat boy culture, but the takeaway i got from reading it is that it's better just to avoid things that we don't like instead of changing them, which seems to run contrary to US experience with feminism, civil rights, and other situations where the old status quo is not longer acceptable.]

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