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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Thu Dec 12, 2013 10:36 am 
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Dr Bronners, MD
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I stopped reading at:

45. Orgies

You'd better hope that you really care about all those people you're having orgies with, otherwise the sex will suck, and then what's even the point? Did I get that right?

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Thu Dec 12, 2013 11:34 am 
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Yeah, I think I stopped reading somewhere in the 20s after they kept banging on about needing to be in love for sex to be any good.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Thu Dec 12, 2013 1:30 pm 
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I didn't make it very far into the list, but i am curious if the picture of pretty tattooed people having sex was actually related in any way.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Thu Dec 12, 2013 2:10 pm 
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DrakeRedcrest wrote:
Someone that I know posted this on facebook: http://elitedaily.com/life/the-100-thin ... o-realize/

I knew that the list was going to be great when the first one is that you need an hour to get ready before going to work or class, and the third is that shaving is "more than a suggestion." The only response I have is loud, angry yelling.


Laura Beck destroyed this list pretty well: http://jezebel.com/elite-daily-where-be ... 1353594165

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Thu Dec 12, 2013 2:19 pm 
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The world needs more Laura Becks.


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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Thu Dec 12, 2013 8:36 pm 
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My husband's best friend is staying with us for a few days. He looks at Leela and saws "OH you are so cute! I am going to call you Princess from now on! You are such a little Princess! Awwww! PRINCESS LEELA!!!!!!"

Well now I hate you. Really, how flipping original to call a little girl princess. And he wasn't even making a Star Wars joke.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 12:48 am 
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Erika Soyf*cker wrote:
DrakeRedcrest wrote:
Someone that I know posted this on facebook: http://elitedaily.com/life/the-100-thin ... o-realize/

I knew that the list was going to be great when the first one is that you need an hour to get ready before going to work or class, and the third is that shaving is "more than a suggestion." The only response I have is loud, angry yelling.


Laura Beck destroyed this list pretty well: http://jezebel.com/elite-daily-where-be ... 1353594165


Oh thanks! She put it better than I ever could:

Quote:
This list is Everything. It has it all — it's offensive, but boring! It's infuriating, but banal! I don't know how this junior mint male managed to pull it off, but he did.

This list was almost the worst - except it would have needed to be at least coherent to deserve that qualification. It was just... so bad.


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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 9:55 am 
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Dr Bronners, MD
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annabazoo wrote:
I didn't make it very far into the list, but i am curious if the picture of pretty tattooed people having sex was actually related in any way.


Only inasmuch as a one of the items below it was about how if you're going to get a tattoo, it better be small and hideable.

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55k usd is like 4 cad or whatever equivalent in beavers you use on the island - joshua


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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 1:49 pm 
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Sometimes i want to start calling myself a "gender equalist" instead of a feminist because it feels like every time i tell someone i am a feminist, they respond with something silly about how women aren't better than men, all genders suffers, etc etc. And then when i tell them feminism is about equality among genders, they tell me about some feminist they briefly spoke to who hated men. It is unfortunate that one encounter with one person can skew someone's whole perspective on an issue. And that people seem to care more about telling me that i care about the wrong things than actually doing something to help solve the things they care about.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 2:22 pm 
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annabazoo wrote:
Sometimes i want to start calling myself a "gender equalist" instead of a feminist because it feels like every time i tell someone i am a feminist, they respond with something silly about how women aren't better than men, all genders suffers, etc etc. And then when i tell them feminism is about equality among genders, they tell me about some feminist they briefly spoke to who hated men. It is unfortunate that one encounter with one person can skew someone's whole perspective on an issue. And that people seem to care more about telling me that i care about the wrong things than actually doing something to help solve the things they care about.


I've had this experience too. I start talking about third-wave feminism and blah blah blah but it doesn't really help.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 2:32 pm 
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I tend to say "queer feminist" but a) it still has the word fem in it and b) most people don't even know what I'm talking about

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 3:18 pm 
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Seems to me the pushback against merely the word "feminism" is evidence of its importance.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 3:22 pm 
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It's the result of a successful backlash campaign of the right from the '80s in response to the gains of second wave feminism.

I educate people who seem genuine, and give the rest sarcasm and stinkeye.


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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 3:25 pm 
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I don't think many people have actually met angry man hating feminists. They just buy into the stereotype. And the media doesn't help.
Also, for a lot of people "man hating" could be equated to a simple statement such as "men make more money than women at similar jobs". I mean, maybe they're read their Valerie Solanas but somehow I doubt it.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 4:13 pm 
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Yeah, i kinda doubt very many people have actually met a man-hating feminist. Although, it's entirely likely that they could take some statements i make and twist it into something man-hating.
I guess people who are already set in believing that feminism is bullshitake (i was told this lastnight) aren't really worth talking to. I just have a problem in which i really like arguing when i drink, even if it is pointless and upsetting.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 4:52 pm 
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I feel like the people who claim to have met an angry feminist are the same ones who claim to have met an angry vegan that one time. That is, I call bullshiitake.

Also, what j-dub said.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 4:52 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Tue Dec 17, 2013 11:20 am 
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GAAAH. Somehow I missed this steaming pile of patronizing patriarchal bullcrap.

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/12/15/opini ... .html?_r=0

There have been lots of responses; here's one I liked.

http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2013/12/17/n ... n-happier/

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Tue Dec 17, 2013 11:44 am 
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As if all the ridiculous jewelry commercials weren't enough, last night I saw one that started by saying, 'This commercial is for women only…' And then it was an add only for chocolate diamonds.

Because wimmin and their chocolate, amirite??

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But if one were to tickle Pluto, I suspect that it might very quietly laugh. - pandacookie

55k usd is like 4 cad or whatever equivalent in beavers you use on the island - joshua


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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Tue Dec 17, 2013 12:18 pm 
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allularpunk wrote:
As if all the ridiculous jewelry commercials weren't enough, last night I saw one that started by saying, 'This commercial is for women only…' And then it was an add only for chocolate diamonds.

Because wimmin and their chocolate, amirite??
My idiot nephew's idiot girlfriend (the universe pairs 'em off) is forever posting links to various jewelers - particularly Tiffany's - on FB with winking emoticons, etc. To which her stupid mother and friends invariably respond by tagging my nephew in comments like, "Could this be a hint?" and "Is there something you want to tell me?" Sometimes it's all I can do not to say something about how A. if she's so desperate for jewelry she should probably buy it herself, since she's dating a used car salesman with a drinking problem, who probably doesn't know what Tiffany's is; and B. feminism should be arriving in her universe any year now, but there's no point.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Tue Dec 17, 2013 12:24 pm 
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I actually met a group of man hating feminists. They had a commune in the Keys and sometimes came to Miami to eat at the (woman owned) restaurant I worked at. But I knew they didn't represent all feminists.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Tue Dec 17, 2013 1:30 pm 
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pandacookie wrote:
I don't think many people have actually met angry man hating feminists. They just buy into the stereotype. And the media doesn't help.
Also, for a lot of people "man hating" could be equated to a simple statement such as "men make more money than women at similar jobs". I mean, maybe they're read their Valerie Solanas but somehow I doubt it.



Honestly all it takes is the mere suggestion that men oppress women in the slightest way, and you're a manhater. I honestly don't relax around cishet dudes out of a sense of survival, if you seem like a dudebro I won't relax until you've established you're not homophobic/transphobic/misogynistic. And I really feel bad about that sometimes!

Just this week I felt bad for not telling a guy at work (not really a coworker, works in the building and hired by the same owner, but technically different company) that my scarf was a pride scarf after he asked me about it. So bad I did tell him later...and then he invited me to a threesome and said some pretty gross shiitake. And has since been sexually harassing a coworker to the point where she's scared to be at work. He's been told by management to back off but he's still hanging around looking for her :/

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Tue Dec 17, 2013 1:48 pm 
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Can you report him to management as well? They'll be a lot more likely to do something about him if two of you complain, because the behavior you describe is harassment as well. Its really rotten that he is getting away with making someone afraid to be at work.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Tue Dec 17, 2013 2:13 pm 
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I didn't do it mostly because I told him off and he stopped, and I work evenings and weekends and I don't see management, but also no one in management and only a few of my coworkers know I'm queer...I juuust finished my new hire "probationary" period a few days ago and I didn't really want it to get out before then. But I'm going to, especially since I need them to know that he's hanging around right after he was told he can't.

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 Post subject: Re: Who challenges your feminism in your life?
PostPosted: Tue Dec 17, 2013 3:20 pm 
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Someone, a nonppker I think (but she is friends with many ppkers) posted a link about feminism then a guy jumped in and was talking about how men and women can't be equal because women have babies and men are good at math (while women aren't). I should've known better but I engaged and mentioned that sciences/math fields are hostile environments for women and gave a simple example of a tech conference where boobs and asparagi of women at the conference are discussed periodically by the attendants and speakers. The guy commented that women should be flattered unless they are jealous because they aren't the object of the attention. I can't believe men would actually think that way.

Anyway, she ended up deleting and re-adding the thread so his sexist comments disappeared but I'm still shocked that in this day and age that men think that women aren't in sciences and math areas more because of lack of ability and furthermore that women should be flattered by sexual comments from their professional peers.

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