| Register  | FAQ  | Search | Login 
It is currently Wed Jul 30, 2014 6:17 am

All times are UTC - 6 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 92 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4
Author Message
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Mon Oct 25, 2010 6:00 am 
Offline
Flounceiad 2011
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 8:26 pm
Posts: 5256
Location: A New England
bathsheba wrote:
True story: the other day I was told "You would eat your babies."


You should have answered, "Well, yeah; because they're delicious! Why else do people have babies?"

_________________
Nothing is safe from weiners in my neighborhood... ~ crowderpea
I didn't embarrass him by saying anything about wanking ~ 8ball
"SMLOUNCE!" ~ smurfterrobang?!
http://elizaveganpage.blogspot.com


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Mon Oct 25, 2010 6:45 pm 
Offline
Hip Goiter
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 5:07 pm
Posts: 8157
Location: Philly/London
Sarah wrote:
Tell them you'll name your kid something weird like Fetus. Maybe they'll shut up?



Hahaha I love this as a name

_________________
@randibop for le tweets & le pics

Laughfrodisiac


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Tue Oct 26, 2010 3:42 pm 
Offline
Memorized Veganomicon
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 9:23 pm
Posts: 99
Location: PDX, OR
RandiJM wrote:
Sarah wrote:
Tell them you'll name your kid something weird like Fetus. Maybe they'll shut up?

Hahaha I love this as a name

Or as part of a name. Fetus-Anne, Fetus-Paul, etc.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 12:55 am 
Offline
Level 7 Vegan
User avatar

Joined: Sat Oct 23, 2010 2:41 am
Posts: 1556
Location: "HOLLAND"
jdfunks wrote:
child-free, represent.

I'll keep sticking IUDs in till I die.

THIS.



Also: is it too soon to remind everyone you probably can't afford to buy children?


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 6:13 am 
Offline
Trapped On A Desert Island With A Cow
User avatar

Joined: Fri Oct 22, 2010 6:57 pm
Posts: 446
Location: San Diego, CA
Both times that my sister gave birth, she went right back to work and school. I lived with her and my BIL, took care of the kids and all that jazz, which really showed me that I am way too selfish to be in charge of another human being's life. That's a big deal. I know I would be constantly second-guessing myself about the tiniest, don't mean shittake in the long run decisions. I have a hard time enough at the co-op deciding on what kind of fruit I want to eat for breakfast let alone making decisions about breast feeding or diapers or other kid-like things. And I like to travel...a lot. This was our 17th move in 7 years. I wouldn't want to do that to a kid.

Plus, I am thoroughly convinced that my spawn would have all of my mental disorders thrust upon them and I find that to be particularly cruel.

_________________
"Put it away Randy. That's dangerous." -Some man talking to Randy at Disney World

Organarchists Unite

Vegan Sushi Roll Pillows & More!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 10:19 am 
Offline
Can't Dance, Isn't Part of Revolution
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 1:49 pm
Posts: 147
Location: boston!
soyaspade wrote:
I love this thread! Thank you all for sharing your thoughts and experiences.

I feel stressed about the decision to have kids or not. I'm not a great decider when it comes to big decisions. I guess I'm afraid I'll make the wrong decision and regret it. Over population and resource depletion are huge in my list of reasons to not have a kid.

I feel happy and satisfied most days which is really cool and I think a big part of that is that I have time to do the things I want to do, do things for other people, and sleep. It seems the trade off with having kids is that you get these occasional transcendent moments of joy within a life of chaos, frustration, worries, competition, and lack of sleep.

It also seems that giving time and energy to community becomes challenging when your life is consumed by raising a person. The idea of breastfeeding really appeals to me, but the idea of labor terrifies me. I'm am conflicted... I wish I knew what I wanted and the whole limited reproductive window is so annoying!


abbierae wrote:
I am undecided. Although I feel like I will be okay with it either way, which is a nice place to be. Sometimes I spend time with kids and really love the way they see the world and experience new things, and sometimes I spend time with kids and think that I would really rather just be by myself and not have to worry about someone else. I imagine that parents often feel the same way.

In any case, the presumption that children are the end all of life experience bugs the shiitake out of me.


You two have put into words exactly how I feel. Although, sometimes being undecided is a tough place to be when you have a boyfriend who definitely wants kids. I haven't got much crepe about not having kids from family, but this summer my mom asked me when she was getting her grandchildren and what language they would speak! And I was like, what the fork I still live in a dorm. I'm sorry that a lot of you have been so harassed. I have no idea what I would do in such situations.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 10:47 am 
Offline
Should Write a Goddam Book Already
User avatar

Joined: Fri Oct 22, 2010 2:23 pm
Posts: 1049
Location: MKE
Every OB/GYN I've ever had has refused to even discuss tubal ligation with me: I'm too young, my boyfriend might want kids (he doesn't), I'll change my mind. I'm 28, and I've known that I didn't want children for as long as I've known that I have the ability to have children, but everyone -- family, co-workers, DOCTORS -- still insists that I'm going to wake up one morning with an unyielding desire to breed. No. I have no biological clock. I have no mothering instinct. It is not going to happen.

Nowadays, many/most of my previously unabashedly wild friends are starting to "settle down," longingly gaze at strollers passing by, and talk about spawning, and it's kinda freaking me out. I have absolutely no idea how to relate to anyone who wants to have children, and while my continued inability to bridge that cultural gap is something I'm well aware is a personal failing, I have no idea how to even start learning how to handle it (baby showers, people asking me to hold their babies, baby photos, etc.). It's going to be like going to an immersion school that teaches a lost language.

_________________
Milwaukee Vegan Bake Sale


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 11:02 am 
Offline
Had sex with a vampire that sparkles.
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:24 pm
Posts: 5364
Location: BRLA
I'd probably pitch a really mature fit if a doctor told me no sterilization because my boyfriend might want kids.

_________________
The thing about this thread is, it's dumb. - IJDI


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 12:12 pm 
Offline
Should Write a Goddam Book Already
User avatar

Joined: Fri Oct 22, 2010 2:23 pm
Posts: 1049
Location: MKE
Fee wrote:
I'd probably pitch a really mature fit if a doctor told me no sterilization because my boyfriend might want kids.

As far as I know, there's a law in Wisconsin that requires you to get your spouse's consent before you get a vasectomy or tubal ligation, which might be where this fun line of "logic" originated. Blows my mind.

_________________
Milwaukee Vegan Bake Sale


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 12:37 pm 
Offline
Making Threats to Punks Again
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 3:36 pm
Posts: 1126
My gynie promised that I can have an ovariohysterectomy when I'm 28. Only nine years to go!!

_________________
"I will rip out your IV and other roman numerals." - pandacookie
"The one thing I would not do for Aubrey Plaza is harm a baby, by the way." - strawberryrock


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 12:49 pm 
Offline
Bought a used copy of Natural Harvest
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:29 pm
Posts: 6045
Location: Land of Maple and Beavers
I won't rule anything out but I am pretty sure I never want children. I get the "oh, you'll change your mind" thing all the time. The more I'm around babies, the less I want one. Sooo, there's that.

_________________
Did you notice the slight feeling of panic at the words "Chicken Basin Street"? Like someone was walking over your grave? Try not to remember. We must never remember. - mumbles
Is this about devilberries and nazifruit again? - footface


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 3:11 pm 
Offline
Smuggling Raisins
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 6:36 pm
Posts: 328
Location: Oakland, CA
I love children. I like hanging out with them and reading books with them and having my partner's niece call me "Uncle Kate". I would be a competent mother. I still have no desire to have children of my own and sincerely doubt I ever will.
Dogs, on the other hand, give me all the dogs.

_________________
Sir Isaac Newton is the deadliest son of a bisque in space.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 4:25 pm 
Offline
Memorized Veganomicon
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 9:23 pm
Posts: 99
Location: PDX, OR
Kate wrote:
I love children. I like hanging out with them and reading books with them and having my partner's niece call me "Uncle Kate". I would be a competent mother. I still have no desire to have children of my own and sincerely doubt I ever will.
Dogs, on the other hand, give me all the dogs.

agreed. I scared the shiitake out of my ADAMANTLY no-baby girlfriend one day when, while walking, we saw a two year old(ish) and a puppy playing on the sidewalk with their doting parents hovering nearby. It was super cute, we both smiled at kid/dog, parents, each other. Half a block later, I turn to her and...

erawka: You know, I really want a --
m: YOU WANT A WHAT?!?!
erawka: ... a puppy.

and I've had to really demonstrate my no-baby cred since then. I can't even eat them because that would suggest I want a baby in my body.

grammar edit.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 5:05 pm 
Offline
Invented Vegan Meringue
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 2:18 pm
Posts: 3834
Location: Portland, OR
stephanie: I hear ya.


And really, everyone else supporting and posting in this thread, yes!

Sometimes I'll make cutesy little faces at cutesy little babies on the bus (some part of my head tells me it's weird not to - and this is like, twice a year), but I make the same ones at cats.

_________________
get sconed!
& @jdfunks on that thing


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 8:20 pm 
Offline
Huffs Nutritional Yeast
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 2:18 pm
Posts: 119
Location: Akron, OH
I knew ever since I was 14 that I did NOT want chilren once I figured out exactly what that meant to me. Gestation and responsibility raising a child is not for me!

I remember informing my now ex-husband three weeks into dating that I didn't want children, and if he had any desire to be a father, he needed to find another woman. Still didn't stop the mustard from plotting reproduction with my mother. Every holiday my mother would ask me, in front of the now ex, if I'd changed my mind about having kids. I'd respond with a hell to the no! And she'd smile at my ex with a smug little smile. After I divorced the him, my mother informed me that he'd always tell her that I was "softening up to the idea of having kids." Yeah, maybe having them for dinner, I found out from the ppk that babies are supposed to be delicious.

That said, I got my tubal at 31, three months before I walked out on my ex. I remember informing my ex of my decision to get fixed and he got all quiet and said "It's your decision." and left the room. Damn straight, it's my decision. I also remember all the shiitake I got from my family and friends I chose to tell about my decision to get fixed. Their reactions let me know that I shouldn't be broadcasting my decision to get fixed. The best one came from my father who said, "But she's really good with animals, I'd hate to lose that in the bloodline."


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2010 1:45 am 
Offline
Drunk Dialed Ian MacKaye
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 2:23 pm
Posts: 2000
jdfunks wrote:


And really, everyone else supporting and posting in this thread, yes!

Sometimes I'll make cutesy little faces at cutesy little babies on the bus (some part of my head tells me it's weird not to - and this is like, twice a year), but I make the same ones at cats.


Haha, yes.

Lately there's been a lot of: 'my life would mean nothing without my children' going around, and it really gets my pantaloons in a twist.

No, I don't want any kids. Why do I have to explain my reasons? Why don't you have to explain your reasons for having them? 'It's natural'? Well it's never felt natural to me, sorry.

_________________
When it comes to, you know, modern technology, think of me somewhere in the Middle Ages, training my hedgehog friends to knit socks. ~Phoenix


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Can we bring back a posi child-free support thread?
PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2010 5:10 pm 
Offline
Invented Vegan Meringue
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 5:20 pm
Posts: 3843
Location: Edinburgh
jdfunks wrote:
Sometimes I'll make cutesy little faces at cutesy little babies on the bus (some part of my head tells me it's weird not to - and this is like, twice a year), but I make the same ones at cats.

Yeah, I sometimes smile at cute babies, but that doesn't mean I want one. I don't smile at ugly babies, and I get annoyed if I hear a screaming kid across the street. And I know that, if I had a kid, it would scream occasionally, and it might be ugly. So, no thanks.

_________________
A pie eating contest is a battle with no losers. - amandabear


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 92 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4

All times are UTC - 6 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Anek, Exabot [Bot], SimVeggie and 7 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group
Template made by DEVPPL/ThatBigForum and fancied up by What Cheer