| Register  | FAQ  | Search | Login 
It is currently Sat Apr 19, 2014 3:48 pm

All times are UTC - 6 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 21 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Thu Aug 23, 2012 1:19 pm 
Calls "cavemen" on that
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Thu Nov 11, 2010 10:53 pm
Posts: 2228
Then again don't. these are freaking hilarious.

10 Shades of Stupid: Cosmo’s Worst BDSM Tips

http://jezebel.com/5937084/10-shades-of ... -bdsm-tips

What the actual fork is up with the last one? I just can't even...what? What on my where? What am I, a parking meter?


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Thu Aug 23, 2012 1:51 pm 
Should Spend More Time Helping the Animals
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Tue Dec 07, 2010 4:57 pm
Posts: 6147
Location: Boston, MA
Awesome. Sometimes I heart Jezebel so much.

"Hold a blueberry muffin in your fist and punch him in the mouth."

_________________
I would eat Dr. Cow pocket cheese in a second. I would eat it if you hid it under your hat, or in your backpack, but not if it was in your shoe. That's where I draw the line. -allularpunk


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Thu Aug 23, 2012 1:51 pm 
The Real Hamburger Helper
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 1:04 am
Posts: 2272
Location: UK
These made me laugh out loud, especially the Jezebel comments.

Quote:
Incidentally, if the women who read Cosmo need to be cautioned against stabbing someone with a fork hard enough to break the skin, then their partners are going to need more than a safe word

_________________
Everyone turns into Boo Radley, if they live long enough ~ seitanicverses


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Thu Aug 23, 2012 2:20 pm 
Dead by dawn
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 9:54 pm
Posts: 7443
Location: Seattle
jogirl wrote:
These made me laugh out loud, especially the Jezebel comments.

Quote:
Incidentally, if the women who read Cosmo need to be cautioned against stabbing someone with a fork hard enough to break the skin, then their partners are going to need more than a safe word

Haha... followed by "...given that you may already be holding a fork in this scenario..." Too much funny for work. Thank goodness I sit tucked back in the corner by myself where I can laugh myself silly.

_________________
facebook
"The PPK: Come for the pie; stay for the croissants." - tinglepants!
"Cockblocked by Richard Branson- again!" - Erika Soyf*cker


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Thu Aug 23, 2012 2:55 pm 
Married to the wolfman
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 9:49 pm
Posts: 5605
Location: Santa Cruz, CA
Let's form a pact right now. None of us will ever refer to anything we put on our breasts during sex as "yummy toppings" verbally or mentally ever again.

_________________
"Hummus; a gentleman's vice." -- Mars

coldandsleepy cooks, THE BLOG!


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Thu Aug 23, 2012 3:07 pm 
We So Excited
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Sun Oct 24, 2010 7:44 pm
Posts: 573
coldandsleepy wrote:
Let's form a pact right now. None of us will ever refer to anything we put on our breasts during sex as "yummy toppings" verbally or mentally ever again.


Ever again?


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Thu Aug 23, 2012 3:09 pm 
Invented Vegan Meringue
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 3:10 pm
Posts: 3805
Location: St. Louis
"Hold a blueberry muffin in your fist and punch him in the mouth." AHAHAHA

_________________
Space has stared into the tiny syrup holes of our shame and it does not judge us. - Amandabear

I have a blog: http://upthefolks.tumblr.com/
art: http://upthefolksstudio.tumblr.com/


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Thu Aug 23, 2012 3:09 pm 
The Real Hamburger Helper
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 1:04 am
Posts: 2272
Location: UK
Friday wrote:
coldandsleepy wrote:
Let's form a pact right now. None of us will ever refer to anything we put on our breasts during sex as "yummy toppings" verbally or mentally ever again.


Ever again?

Ha ha!

_________________
Everyone turns into Boo Radley, if they live long enough ~ seitanicverses


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Thu Aug 23, 2012 5:21 pm 
Kitchens Planning Manchester
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 4:12 pm
Posts: 2531
Location: MKE
Oh my...if you need me, I'll just be over here practicing my fax noises

_________________
"I think I am going to turn into a chickpea." ~Dakini
Love is like a pineapple, sweet and undefinable ~ Piet Hein


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Thu Aug 23, 2012 7:39 pm 
Should Spend More Time Helping the Animals
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 2:35 pm
Posts: 6422
Location: Norristown, PA
Hahaha, FORK.

_________________
Man, fork the gender card, imma come at you with the whole damned gender deck. - Olives
Did you ever think that, like, YOU are a sexy costume FOR a diva cup? - solipsistnation
blog! FB!


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2012 3:09 pm 
Should Write a Goddam Book Already
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Fri Oct 22, 2010 1:10 pm
Posts: 1016
Location: East Tennessee!
What is it with Cosmo and strangling peni with accessories?

_________________
Animals are my friends--and I don't eat my friends.
~ George Bernard Shaw


"God said, kill and eat!" ~ my grandmother


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2012 10:17 pm 
Level 7 Vegan
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 11:53 pm
Posts: 1564
booberthefraggle wrote:
"Hold a blueberry muffin in your fist and punch him in the mouth." AHAHAHA


Every time you all quote this I bust out laughing again.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Sat Aug 25, 2012 5:37 am 
Huffs Nooch
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Mon Apr 16, 2012 5:10 pm
Posts: 123
Do you think it would be okay if I used a cranberry muffin or would that totally ruin the mood?


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Sat Aug 25, 2012 7:56 am 
Wears Durian Helmet
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 2:15 pm
Posts: 858
Location: South West UK
Cranberry is probably better than chocolate chip. Probably. But only for kinky sex muffin purposes.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Sat Aug 25, 2012 8:09 am 
Has it on Blue Vinyl
User avatar
Online

Joined: Sat Oct 23, 2010 8:04 am
Posts: 2091
Location: nj
Ha that was hilarious!

_________________
I'm not asking for utopian dreams...just a little peace in this world. That's a logical thing. - Deee-Lite


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Sat Aug 25, 2012 9:58 am 
No-pants hermit 4 lyfe
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Sun Oct 24, 2010 10:22 am
Posts: 3024
Location: BKLN
put an ice cube in the muffin and let it melt over his lips as you press your thumb into his dislocated jaw.

_________________
"rise from the ashes of douchebaggery like a fancy vegan phoenix" - amandabear
"I'm pretty sure the moral of this story is: fork pants." - cq


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Sat Aug 25, 2012 10:19 am 
Should Write a Goddam Book Already
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Fri Oct 22, 2010 9:09 am
Posts: 1041
Location: Denver
Stick a fork in him; he's done!


Actually, I just can't get over the coin thing. I mean, i guess it's cheaper than buying glass or stainless toys if you want to do temperature stuff, but ????????? Really??? Frozen coins? No.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Sat Aug 25, 2012 11:18 pm 
Should Write a Goddam Book Already
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Fri Oct 22, 2010 1:10 pm
Posts: 1016
Location: East Tennessee!
Surprise your man at the office with a fork and a sock full of (clean!) pennies!

Next time you have dinner at his parent's house, sneak one of his ties into your purse. Just as he's tucking into the green bean casserole, lasso his member with the tie and start tugging away. The thought of getting caught will make it extra hot!

_________________
Animals are my friends--and I don't eat my friends.
~ George Bernard Shaw


"God said, kill and eat!" ~ my grandmother


Top
 Profile WWW  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 8:31 am 
Prefers Jar Jar Binks over Han Solo
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 2:54 am
Posts: 1984
Location: Munich, finally!
This is hilarious and totally inappropriate to read at work. Just because I can't stop laughing and my colleague is on the phone.

_________________
I dunno, I guess I just get enthused over eating big ol' squishy balls. - Interrobang?!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 9:08 am 
Keepin' It Seal
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:32 pm
Posts: 3537
Location: Long Island, NY
This is the best. I love the one with the coins. Can someone please try that and post about their partner's reaction?

_________________
Blog (that I only really update during VeganMoFo): http://joyfulgirl415.blogspot.com/


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Oh Cosmo...please stop
PostPosted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 12:22 pm 
Should Spend More Time Helping the Animals
User avatar
Offline

Joined: Tue Dec 07, 2010 4:57 pm
Posts: 6147
Location: Boston, MA
So I posted this on Facebook, and of course my dad was like, "Hold a blueberry muffin in your fist and punch him in the mouth; what does that mean?"

_________________
I would eat Dr. Cow pocket cheese in a second. I would eat it if you hid it under your hat, or in your backpack, but not if it was in your shoe. That's where I draw the line. -allularpunk


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Reply to topic  [ 21 posts ] 

All times are UTC - 6 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Beer and Tofu, Google [Bot], kaerlighed and 8 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group
Template made by DEVPPL/ThatBigForum and fancied up by What Cheer