| Register  | FAQ  | Search | Login 
It is currently Mon Jul 28, 2014 12:43 pm

All times are UTC - 6 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 102 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5  Next
Author Message
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Wed Sep 07, 2011 11:52 pm 
Offline
And you never will.
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 8:41 pm
Posts: 4252
Location: Memphis
Butternut wrote:
Are uncontrollable farts a consequence of pregnancy?

Yes.

_________________
I'm in a pure mood with poopietits now. Damn her jugs! - interrobang?!
give my you inquiries! and give poopie you burritos. - acr
Sometimes I think, it's really my lack of cybernetic implants that keeps me from being truly human. - Mars


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Thu Sep 08, 2011 6:10 am 
Offline
Should Spend More Time Helping the Animals
User avatar

Joined: Tue Dec 07, 2010 4:57 pm
Posts: 6311
Location: Boston, MA
rocklobster wrote:
ScooterDiva wrote:
cracking up....I also am on a Subaru forum, and they currently have a "Do you fart in your car?" poll... immediately thought of PPK... ;)

answer: its my number one spot for it


Worst thing ever though, when I drive my husband to work, he farts in the car before he gets up and out of the car, and when he does get up the smell is released, and I'm left with a smelly drive home.

I also think it's funny because I once had a Subaru nicknamed Smelly Car. It was my dream car at the time, a Subaru Loyale wagon, and we did get a decent price because of the smell, but just thinking about it makes me feel nauseated.

_________________
I would eat Dr. Cow pocket cheese in a second. I would eat it if you hid it under your hat, or in your backpack, but not if it was in your shoe. That's where I draw the line. -allularpunk


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Thu Sep 08, 2011 12:12 pm 
Offline
Tofu Pup
User avatar

Joined: Thu Jun 02, 2011 1:19 pm
Posts: 11
Location: Warwickshire, UK
Jeesh. I just did a fart that sounded like Chewbacca. What's that about?!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Thu Sep 08, 2011 2:44 pm 
Online
Impressive boner
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 2:57 pm
Posts: 3994
Location: Nottingham.
Dani-Grrl wrote:
Jeesh. I just did a fart that sounded like Chewbacca. What's that about?!


I often do Wookie farts.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Thu Sep 08, 2011 2:58 pm 
Offline
Thinks chickens are assholes
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 1:17 pm
Posts: 5559
mel wrote:
Two summers ago, my husband gambled and lost while he was driving down state. It wasn't a big accident, but it smelled like hell. He had to stop at an outlet mall to try to clean up in a bathroom and then walk into the Adidas store with poopie pants, to get a new outfit. He said that the sales guy kept giving him hateful/sort of hurt glances while he was helping him, as if to say "Why, why are you doing this to me?". Every time he wears the outfit that he bought there, I say he looks like "the shiitake". No one can figure out why I think "he looks so great" in this outfit. TMI? Maybe so, but I care not!



poopiebitch wrote:
I'm reviving this thread, because earlier I was changing poopiebaby's nappy and suddenly I hear my husband rush out of his office (next door to the nursery) and quickly slam the door behind him. I asked it there was something wrong, and it turns out he did a fart that smelled so bad he chased himself out of his own office.


I was already laughing at this thread when I read mel's post, now I'm crying laughing (actual tears!). My chest hurts and I nearly peed reading about your husband PB. I can't read any more in case I do actually pee.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 09, 2011 11:12 am 
Offline
Should Spend More Time Helping the Animals
User avatar

Joined: Tue Dec 07, 2010 4:57 pm
Posts: 6311
Location: Boston, MA
OMG, I keep farting at my desk! I can't help it. Good Lard I hope these don't start to smell. That's what I get for eating beans at two meals yesterday.

_________________
I would eat Dr. Cow pocket cheese in a second. I would eat it if you hid it under your hat, or in your backpack, but not if it was in your shoe. That's where I draw the line. -allularpunk


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 09, 2011 1:13 pm 
Offline
Queen Bitch of Self-Righteous Veganville
User avatar

Joined: Sun Sep 05, 2010 2:21 pm
Posts: 10206
Location: Illinoize
I haven't been farting much lately, but I did have that wonderful experience where you go to a store, get a cart, put a few things in it, and then you have to poop. It's the biggest poop of your life. So you rush around the store, farting, trying to check out so you can run to the bathroom.

_________________
"The Tree is His Penis"

The tree is his penis // it's very exciting // when held up to his mouth // the lights are all lighting // his eyes start a-bulging // in unbridled glee // the tree is his penis // its beauty, effulgent -amandabear


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 09, 2011 6:40 pm 
Offline
Nailed to the V
User avatar

Joined: Wed Dec 29, 2010 3:46 pm
Posts: 581
Location: Anderson, South Carolina
I think these fantastic brand chili starters are giving me some interesting farts. Good thing I bought a case of twelve!
Ahh.. Amazon prime.

_________________
My name is Ash and I am a slave.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 09, 2011 11:45 pm 
Offline
Dr Bronners, MD
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 5:58 pm
Posts: 4693
Location: Santa Cruz whoop whoop
Every so often, the family unit here will be sitting on the couch, and I'll sneak one out and see if Coldandsleepy checks the Emperor's diaper. It always works.

"Whoa, kid, let's check your diaper! Huh, nothing in there? It sure smells like you made a poop." Meanwhile I'm sniggering loudly in the corner. Usually I admit it, since it's funnier that way.

_________________
"Trolling an internet message board, The Greatest Activism Of All." - pandacookie
Вы такие сексапильные, когда злитесь


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Sat Sep 10, 2011 7:53 am 
Offline
Should Spend More Time Helping the Animals
User avatar

Joined: Tue Dec 07, 2010 4:57 pm
Posts: 6311
Location: Boston, MA
I just woke myself up because I was farting.

_________________
I would eat Dr. Cow pocket cheese in a second. I would eat it if you hid it under your hat, or in your backpack, but not if it was in your shoe. That's where I draw the line. -allularpunk


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Sat Nov 19, 2011 8:09 pm 
Offline
Tofu Pup

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 7:55 am
Posts: 13
Ok, so I just had to bump this thread to tell a story that happened a few days ago. It started with some delicious cabbage broccoli soup that I ate way to much of. After dinner, I retreated into my room to do some reading. The door was shut. Before long, I farted, and it was a reallyyyyy bad one. But whatever, because I was alone, right? So the gas kept coming and I kept letting it out. After a while, either because I was too engrossed in my book, or because I had gotten used to it, or because I was subconsciously breathing through my mouth, I didn't notice the smell anymore.

Then my roommate walked in to ask me a question. She got about two steps in before she stopped in mid-sentence, pulled her shirt over her nose, staggered backwards while spinning around, and slammed the door shut. I was cracking up at this point, but I was able to hear her yelling something about "gas chamber" and "my mouth was open." She also claimed that she could still smell it the next day, but I think (hope?) she was exaggerating.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2011 8:20 am 
Offline
Not NOT A Furry
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 4:49 am
Posts: 514
I love this thread.

_________________
Yay, and verily he said unto them, "Eat this nooch for it tastes kind of like cheese, and drink this kombucha for it is awesome. And don't be a vegan hating douche because no one likes an asshat." - DancesWithTofu


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2011 3:15 pm 
Offline
Smuggling Raisins
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 6:56 pm
Posts: 321
Location: Ohio
I was reading this thread to my husband last night and at times it was hard to keep talking because I was laughing so hard.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2011 3:22 pm 
Offline
Making Threats to Punks Again
User avatar

Joined: Sat Feb 12, 2011 2:59 pm
Posts: 1099
Location: heartadixie
I keep scaring the cat.

_________________
My last Craigslist ad "Bangable Panda for You" got only a few responses and they all just said 'send pic' or 'black and white or red?' - pandacookie
I don't want anyone here who doesn't know every forking line to Willy Wonka. - Fee


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2011 7:44 pm 
Offline
Banned from Vegan Freaks.
User avatar

Joined: Fri Dec 31, 2010 7:45 pm
Posts: 368
Location: around Beaumont, Texas
I had fresh juice this morning too close to my breakfast, so I figure that's why I've been farting all day. But they're baby ones. They're toots.

_________________
My brother had a beehive in Ithaca, and a bear destroyed it.
He has a new beehive now, but this one has hurtful anti-bear epithets scrawled all over it.
And that's why I don't eat honey.

- just mumbles

Twitter: TheSpinachGirl
Blog:Spinach Girl


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2011 7:47 pm 
Offline
Not NOT A Furry
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 4:49 am
Posts: 514
Had lots of Daiya yesterday. Today, I'm gonna need an exorcist or fumigator or something... I'm packing enough blast power to fly myself across the Atlantic, and my husband won't sit in the same room with me.

_________________
Yay, and verily he said unto them, "Eat this nooch for it tastes kind of like cheese, and drink this kombucha for it is awesome. And don't be a vegan hating douche because no one likes an asshat." - DancesWithTofu


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2011 8:44 pm 
Offline
The Real Hamburger Helper
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 1:46 pm
Posts: 2372
I had cauliflower and cabbage for dinner...both prime offenders....just waiting....


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 12:38 pm 
Offline
And you never will.
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 8:41 pm
Posts: 4252
Location: Memphis
This isn't MY fart story, but this just made me laugh until I cried, so I thought I would share with the PPK:

http://hahasforhoohas.com/the-fart-that ... y-destiny/

_________________
I'm in a pure mood with poopietits now. Damn her jugs! - interrobang?!
give my you inquiries! and give poopie you burritos. - acr
Sometimes I think, it's really my lack of cybernetic implants that keeps me from being truly human. - Mars


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 1:06 pm 
Offline
Queen Bitch of Self-Righteous Veganville
User avatar

Joined: Sun Sep 05, 2010 2:21 pm
Posts: 10206
Location: Illinoize
Oh god, I just loled at work. 'I can taste it' made me lose it.

I wish Brian were so forgiving. Every time I fart he gives me a look like I just pissed on his grandma. And then I laugh because he's looking at me and he says he looks at me like that because I think it's funny but I wouldn't be laughing if I didn't know he was about to act totally disgusted.

_________________
"The Tree is His Penis"

The tree is his penis // it's very exciting // when held up to his mouth // the lights are all lighting // his eyes start a-bulging // in unbridled glee // the tree is his penis // its beauty, effulgent -amandabear


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 1:14 pm 
Offline
Should Write a Goddam Book Already
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jan 16, 2012 9:37 pm
Posts: 1084
Location: Western Mass
I was walking up the stairs yesterday and let out a fart that sounded like my foot kicking a stair. Really forking loud. Mom was like "What the hell was that?" I told her I stubbed my toe.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 1:44 pm 
Offline
And you never will.
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 8:41 pm
Posts: 4252
Location: Memphis
mrsbadmouth wrote:
Oh god, I just loled at work. 'I can taste it' made me lose it.

That's the part that got me, too.

And my husband has always been a fart-factory, but he acts disgusted when I fart! It's apparently okay for him to rip 20+ (stinky) farts each day, but I let one loose and it's sooooo nasty? I just laugh.

_________________
I'm in a pure mood with poopietits now. Damn her jugs! - interrobang?!
give my you inquiries! and give poopie you burritos. - acr
Sometimes I think, it's really my lack of cybernetic implants that keeps me from being truly human. - Mars


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 2:03 pm 
Offline
Semen Strong
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 7:10 pm
Posts: 18745
Location: Cliffbar NJ
That was a brilliant story!

I have to say that Rajma gives me the worst farts ever. If anyone is looking to test their sphinctre power, this is for you: http://indianfood.about.com/od/vegetari ... /rajma.htm

_________________
But on a cold winter night, when the wind whispers through the trees and a bright, white moon hangs heavy in the air, you might hear a sad cry like someone thinking he knows what's best for you, and that'll be the white man a-passin' you by. just mumbles


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 7:42 pm 
Offline
Inflexitarian
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 6:28 pm
Posts: 731
Location: Funky Town
I have a student we'll call DJ. DJ should not eat whatever the hell it is he eats all the time. He clears my room out daily with the stank-ness. Anyway, today DJ was being his usual gassy self and just after he let one go, someone else did too, and then another, and then another. I had a friggin chain reaction! My room was hazmat material for two hours. We seriously moved outside because it was so bad. The principal thought the bathroom across the hall was backed up and didn't believe it was in my room until I made him walk in. Half the upper floor was complaining of the smell. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Monday's writing prompt is going to be about farting.

_________________
~Sweet songs the youth, the wise, the meeting of all wisdom. To believe in the good in man.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 8:08 pm 
Offline
Dying from Nooch Lung
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 7:14 pm
Posts: 3344
Location: NJ/Philadelphia
poopiebitch wrote:
This isn't MY fart story, but this just made me laugh until I cried, so I thought I would share with the PPK:

http://hahasforhoohas.com/the-fart-that ... y-destiny/

I wanna see the rack that saved her from that fart! Amazing!

_________________
"Gnome kicking says a lot a man's character." - Babbette


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Post your latest fart story!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 10:07 pm 
Offline
Invented Vegan Meringue
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 28, 2010 10:08 pm
Posts: 4051
Location: Malvern, PA
I wasn't going to come in here. I was going to be above all of this, I really was. But then I clicked on it, and I just couldn't stop laughing . . .


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 102 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5  Next

All times are UTC - 6 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: baileyb, Bing [Bot], brian, bsd, Imogen, mooo, supercarrot, sweet_potato, TrailMix and 9 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group
Template made by DEVPPL/ThatBigForum and fancied up by What Cheer