Post Punk Kitchen Forum

... and my band's called Sexy Man Arms. We're a sorta folksy group with jazz influences. You've probably never heard of us; we're pretty underground.

What's your imaginary band like? Tell me all about it.

Dudes With Long Hair Who Hang Out Together (aka DWLHWHOT)

It's the acoustic version of my metal band, Scoliosis.

Hit single: "You Don't Need To Go To India To Find Yourself"

Colon Explosion. We're symphonic-thrash-punkcore. Everyone has a goatee regardless of whether they want/can actually grow one. We cannot actually play instruments, but are fond of the idea. We disbanded in 1992 but continue to meet up for coffee on Saturdays.

Faggy Dan and the Pekingese Clan

A tiny, scrappy-looking little hillbilly with a harmonically talented backup group of well trained Pekingese's. Old-timey down home sound.

Where do I purchase their albums?

at my record store sonic pop.

supercarrot and the creamed corns. i'm a solo act.

(but really, that was my "rock band" (the video game) band. the drummer was an elderly black man a-la morgan freeman named pop corn [he had an awesome shirt in the spirit of 3-wolf moon], i, supercarrot was the vocalist, and gosh, i don't remember the guitarists' names. maybe one was maizy? the other cornelia?)

i'm best known for my work in st. james the great church. it's like a cross between the cocteau twins and radiohead, with more toy piano. sufjan stevens and jonsi like to jam with us. but recently i've been spending a lot of time on my side project, fancy dan master of judo, which is basically just me and a banjo and a lot of glam rock covers.

Nipple Areola Complex - we only do covers of 80's hair bands.

My fake band is always The Beefless Tacos, an all-vegan girl punk band.

The Pantaloon Bloodstains. We play whiskey soaked rock and roll.

Our first album, "Waking Up With Bruises", was a surprise hit.
Our sophomore effort, "Chili Toothpaste", was not well received.
We surprised everyone with our third album "Mr. Wayhoo Gets Funky", which went gold.

were you inspired by self?

um, cocteau twins and radiohead, not ben folds and beat tree.

She Rex. All-girl band covering the songs of Marc Bolan.

self did great toy piano work. :-)

oh, yeah, they're fine, you know? i guess it's just hard to get our sound across with, like, words? you really need to feel it. we use toy piano to remind people of their lost innocence, so it's, like, this far-away sound under all this other beautiful, terrible stuff that's also just noise. it's not your fault if you're having trouble imagining it. it's a pretty new sound. we might have invented it. i mean, i don't know for sure, but i'd say we probably did.

While I've actually been in a couple of bands, most of them seem like they were imaginary anyway.

She Never Can was one of the best names we had...

Dogfart.

Man Feelings.

Because we're men and we have feelings.

Scoby Baby Scoby.

<3<3

Half-Eaten Truck, the banjo playing trio from Newark that plays all Chopin all the time.

yes please!

If we wish hard enough, Half-Eaten Truck might become real.

I'm a member of The Blowhards, a heavy metal tuba quartet. We are very proud of our first album, Black Socks, and our hit single, The Sound of my Air Conditioner.