Post Punk Kitchen Forum

Pulsatile tinnitus that's getting worse. The whooshing sound is driving me crazy! It seems like it's caused by fluid, since it happens when I move my head too far or quickly to the side.

I'm still hurting a bit, but now my back is excruciating from being tense because of the abdominal pain.

Know how crepe I feel? I have bare nails and I DON'T CARE.

I wish I could call in sick tomorrow. But I can't. Nobody will pick up the sub job (my school is on the sub shiitake list because there are lots of schools with kids who behave, so nobody wants to come to ours and deal with our student population), so my coworkers would have to do it which would be horrible because the week before break is busy. They would hate me. I'd hate me. And, Friday will already be a waste because nobody will be in class, so I can't afford to waste another day, even if I could get a sub.

I do have new clothes to wear tomorrow; maybe that will help. A velvet skirt and a black and purple drapey top. (I fail at Christmas shopping)

My sister being disgustingly selfish and childish. Her pettiness where mom is concerned isn't even totally warranted and it's driving me crazy. Mom's not invited to my sister's for the holiday, but my brother, a friend, and I all are. Sometimes I feel like I hate my sister because she's stuck in a state of teenage brattiness and it's really forking irritating.

I think my cat held up his pee for about a day and then let all hell break loose on the bed last night. It's not my fault the vet had to come over and give you a shot in the asparagus on saturday, buddy!

Ok, I'm actually just worried he's getting sick again. :(

My grandmother is passing away right now. She's surrounded by family, but I'm a world away and can't be there. I'm so sad, there were a million things I wish I knew about her life and I'll never be able to ask now. I can just hear her voice...sigh.

hugs, invictus.
Mine is just that it's work day #8 in a row. working weekends isn't fun. I'm tired.

I'm sorry Invictus.


I woke up on my first day back to work with cramping stomach pains and sulphur burps, which usually means I have food poisoning. Then the only time I've had a heart palpitation since Thursday was in the bath when I wasn't wearing the cardiac monitor.

I'm so sorry, Invictus.

Didn't get nearly enough personal care time this weekend (ie like an hour last night total after a stressful week last week) and now I'm paying for it by feeling like I'm going to burst into tears at work for no particular reason. Just need to get through this day without losing it. Desk neighbor is going to have to put up with a lot of snark.

Worst thing about the last three days: sick kid. He's only got a cold - a nasty cough and a fever, but he's so miserable! And he sleeps so badly, everyone else is miserable too...

I'm so sorry, much love to you <3 xxx

My baby niece has been taken into hospital and I haven't heard how she's doing yet. We're hoping it's just because she's had a bad cold for a week, but she had major bowel surgery in September and has had a change in bowel movements over the past few days too. She stopped eating and started vomiting this morning, she's only 5mths old.

I'm really sorry Invictus, not being able to be there must be really hard.

I'm so sorry, Invictus.

Today I found out a good friend/co-worker who is 5 months pregnant is losing her baby. The baby has something called Triploidy, which means it has 69 chromosomes instead of the usual 46. Seriously, all this girl has ever wanted was a baby. They're going to be surgically removing it from her (it just died) from her on Wednesday.

I feel like a jerk for saying this, but...she's hasn't died yet and I kind of wish she would. She's unconscious, on morphine, and will never wake up. I want a faster death for her, since she's already gone. I don't want her dead, but...argh. I'm not wording this right.

I'm sitting here, hoping for an e-mail that she's passed, and feeling like an asparagus.

(((hugs))) Invictus. You're not a jerk or an asparagus for wanting peace for your grandmother.

Nope, that's not a jerk thing, Invictus. I felt the same way about my grandmother. She was suffering and not really "alive" anymore, anyway. It was tortuous for us all to see her like that, and her passing was inevitable at that point in her illness anyway, and yet she painfully hung on for a couple weeks. I think that's a loving thing, to want to see someone's suffering to end.

Don't be too hard on yourself. It's perfectly understandable. You want that person to be alive, not just continuing to function. That's not an option, and you want her passing to be as easy as possible, for her and all her loved ones. When a person's time to pass has come and they're done with life but their body lingers, it is very stressful.

Wishing you and your family all the best in coping with this very difficult situation.

Thanks, guys. This is coupled with having far too much time on my hands, so I have little else to think about.

That makes perfect sense to me. Quality over quantity. I hope it was a good life and I hope your family can focus on those good times. Hail gran!

Will be thinking about you, Invictus, and your family, and hoping your grandma is at peace.

Invictus - this is definitely the hardest time. I took care of my great grandmother who had endured multiple strokes and a heart attack. She was so out of it. She could talk some, but most of it didn't make sense. She would ask for me even though I was there and talking to her. After a week, she passed away.

This may be a strange worst thing but my bio father sent me a christmas card. I was going through our mail, thought we had majorly screwed up our health insurance coverage for next year, while my husband was checking, I saw the card and opened it. Part of me just wanted to throw it away without opening. He says he plans to get back in touch with me when he comes back to the states. I don't think so but he knows where I live. He could just show up one day.

Oh for forks sake. Now the guy who was pursuing me and told me last week that he wanted to be exclusive and was cutting things off with other girls has decided to date someone else. After leading me on for over 5 months. fork today.

Today's worst thing: after another shake-up at work, I have a new manager. I'd worked with the old manager for 10 years, and in spite of our differences, she and I got along very well and we had a good rapport. The new manager is a colleague from my department. She hasn't been there anywhere near as long as I have. Truthfully, she's a way better fit for the position than I am. I'd suck at it and I'd hate it. Still, I feel like a real loser for being so obviously unqualified and unsuited for the position. That feeling reminds me that I need a new job. Or a new life. Something.