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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Sun Jan 13, 2013 6:39 pm 
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When I was growing up, people were always complimenting me on my eyes, or telling my parents about my eyes. I remember a lady at an information desk somewhere and an old man in a restaurant. It always made me very uncomfortable.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Sun Jan 13, 2013 9:51 pm 
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torque wrote:

my eyes, while pretty normal in the US, tend to get a lot of attention here. My father's eyes were similarly intense and when his hair went white they got almost spooky. People would stop him on the street in the US: "oh my god your eyes are SO BLUE, they're so pretty".... today, when someone says that to me, my response is always "thanks to my dad" which at least i feel comfortable saying. [there is the odd occasion when people say something wacko, like "oh my god, you have dog eyes" where i will say "thank you" and walk away as quickly as possible]


ME TOO!! Mine are my grandpa's, so when people comment on them I always say "thanks, they're my grandpa's" and then I think about how creepy it would be if they were literally my grandpa's eyeballs (he's been dead for like 5 years) but whatever.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Sun Jan 13, 2013 9:58 pm 
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***LIES!!!***
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I have a hard time receiving compliments like "you're so pretty" or "you're so smart." I don't get the former one very often, but I get the latter a lot and neither of them seem like things I can take credit for or things that should make me feel superior to anybody else. I'm trying really hard to say things like "you worked so hard on that!" to Malka. In terms of "you're so pretty," she gets that kind of compliment A LOT and it makes me uncomfortable mostly because I know she gets more attention when people think she's pretty and that other kids get less attention in comparison. I do hope that she learns to take pride in her appearance and try to not look shlubby (she's not going to learn that skill from me!), but not to center her value on whether or not others think she's attractive.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 1:31 am 
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Kid, howzabout we ease up on the bratty, snotty, know-it-allism, okay?

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 12:03 pm 
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Nooch of Earl
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There is, apparently, nothing more fascinating IN THE WORLD than the water cooler. If you demand water (out of the water cooler of course! Doesn't matter how many sippy cups full of water you already HAVE scattered about the house) and no one dispenses water into your plastic teacup or other vessel, you must throw a tantrum. And if they do give you the water, you will enjoy drinking it with a hole in your chin the size of Australia, and then proceed to dump the rest out onto the floor. And even though you only get a teaspoon at a time because the adult in your life learns not to give you more, you'll still get yourself and the entire floor inexplicably soaked.

(ETA: this has expanded to water coolers elsewhere. She wrecked about 3 paper cups at the baby gym and had to be hauled out tantrumming after class instead of staying for facepainting.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 12:09 pm 
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haha! Malka is obsessed with fountains (don't think she's seen a water cooler yet). She will usually make us hold her up over a fountain, pressing the button, forever. At the library, though, there are steps up to the water fountain, so at least you don't have to hold her up.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 5:58 pm 
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Chip Strong
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Ha. The water cooler! We took a class in the fall in a place that had a water cooler in the room. Once Ada figured out it was there it was nonstop filling a little paper cup with water. Ada does this thing at home now where if we put water in her little plastic teacup or some other cup and it happens to spill a little when she's walking she just stops and then dumps the whole thing on the floor. Like, oh, I forgot I can just dump it on the floor but that little spilled bit just reminded me.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 6:23 pm 
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Ha! We were at Nate's work a month or so ago and grey found the water cooler, I then spent the next hour trying to block him from it. He just wanted to pull the tab and watch the water pour to the ground. On top of that, every time I followed him to the cooler he thought I was playing a game and started giggling. It was annoying and somehow cute.

We went to a drop in music class ($12/45minutes). Well, it was apparently over stimulating or something cause
Grey started having a meltdown, then instead of napping at his normal time it took several hours and many tears to get him to nap. Now I am crabby.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 6:55 pm 
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Nooch of Earl
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Ugh, that's awful!!!


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 8:46 pm 
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Today was so rough because my husband was around the house but not available. So for 2 hours Leela was yelling "papapappapaapapapa" because she saw his van, heard his voice, saw him working etc. So she missed her nap from overexcitement and then he had to rush to another appointment so he didn't even have much time to come in and snuggle her. And then followed 2 hours of her crying from being overtired. I put her in the car and we went to Target because I just couldn't take it any more. Drove around for an hour and still no nap.

She went to sleep really easily now though

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 12:00 pm 
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Semen Strong
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We got an awesome learning tower and have really drilled "HOT" into Leela. So while I am cooking, I am bodyblocking her from the pan, but letting her look at what we do, and its going really well until she gets her hand past me and grabs the hot pan.

I feel like the worst person ever. She cried for 10 mins, we put ice on her hand and no blistering yet, but I feel like its my fault.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 12:11 pm 
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it breaks your heart but has to happen. hugs, momma.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 12:35 pm 
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Nooch of Earl
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ugh *hugs* Violet hasn't done it recently, but used to pull out the drawer under the oven to stand on it to reach the stove. I get suuuuuper nervous about hot things now. I turn all the handles in, but I still wish my husband were around more to keep her busy while I cook.

Those towers sound so neat and it sounds like it's mostly working out really well for Leela but especially after your post, I can just imagine what a disaster it would be in our household!


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 1:13 pm 
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Semen Strong
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I don't know how you manage alone, seriously, I hope you get a medal :) Leela is mostly pretty calm and good at following directions, but she would get so frustrated when I would cook and she couldn't see, so the Tower was a good choice for us. Because I can't cook or chop with her interfering :) And I had the handle in, and my body between her and the stove, she just managed to reach past me and grab the pan. She can reach the knobs of our gas stove, so that is fun.

But mad props to Vi for being so innovative!

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 2:24 pm 
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Do you have the Ikea felt food breakfast set? It has facon and velami and uncheese slices and a fried..umm..un-egg? so that's not so cool but it also has this adorbs felt cutting board and a felt knife. maybe you could keep her busy with that? or one of the M&D wooden food cutting sets? or the little stirfry set or something? would toys help?

Violet's gotten really good about certain things lately like she was actually HELPFUL when b&i were unloading the dishwasher together a few weeks ago. I would hand her a (plastic!) cup and she would hand it to my husband who was standing by the cabinet to put away. i mean, it wasn't really necessary but it didn't slow things down either.

Anyway what I'm trying to say is maybe it would help to find something safe to keep her occupied. Maybe give her a tub of something like oatmeal or O's to sift through? You can always just vacuum it up if she dumps it..


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 4:07 pm 
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The Real Hamburger Helper
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We have to do the "keep her occupied" idea too. We can manage in the high chair, next to me while I chop (or sometimes I'll do it at the table and let her play with the veg or just some books, etc. When I want her further away (when frying stuff particularly), then I have to pull out something special. Favorites are destroying the contents of my purse, playing with a box of stale cereal and a big pan, splashing in water in the same pan (stock pot) with some props.

Ditto to what Tofulish said about single parenthooddom, annak. I would be in the home for sure.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 5:11 pm 
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Inez's thing lately is shriiiiieeeeeking at the top of her lungs at the cat whenever she sees her. We've had more conversations about why it's not nice than I can count, but now she just proudly proclaims, "Inez scare kitty cat!" after each scream. And the cat runs terrified, of course, so she gets the reaction she's looking for (make the cat run around). Ugh. I feel so bad for a) my poor cat and b) my poor eardrums. Maybe I'll get a new cat dancer or something and see if making the cat run and jump that way appeals to her.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 5:36 pm 
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We distract her normally without incident, but today I thought she was ready to try doing what others have said they do with the Learning Tower. She was great at counting things and putting stuff in and up to now we warn her if something is hot and she stays out of it really well. Ah well, no sign of significant injury and I'm just going to have to not let her participate near the stove for a while.

I am sorry Inez! Leela pulls tails and is annoying the cats. Its the only behavior that I really curb, because the cats are so good with her and its so unfair to them. If she pulls tails, first 3 or so attempts get a redirection and a No (I know you're not supposed to say no) and then the cats get removed to safety.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 8:08 am 
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So this post could probably fit right in with any of the gender rant posts currently going on in other threads - but for me it fits best here because I do just need to vent so that I can then go on to have a nice logical conversation with my husband later. So he is an omni - eats meat with every meal or if I make I nice vegan meal that he will eat he will make himself a porkchop a few hours later as a snack. sigh. Anyway, before we had a child I said I wanted to raise them vegan until they were old enough to make an informed decision about it and after much debate it was agreed that we would feed them vegetarian (basically vegan with the addition of eggs). So I was really surprised when in the midst of talking about the pros and cons of purees vs BLW he asks when we can start the baby on meats!!! Um...we aren't. And then, my husband, who is an educated and typically thoughtful and logical person says, "Oh, well all that vegan stuff is fine for a GIRL. But this boy needs MEAT." So I basically just walked out of the room and went to bed. Ugh.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 8:24 am 
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Oh wow, that sounds so frustrating annasrobbie.

Good luck with the conversation!

My 2c: When do you think you'll be starting BLW? I don't argue about hypotheticals because its so easy to get them built up into strong positions, and the truth is you don't know what is going to happen until you're there.

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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 10:51 am 
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We are going to give him a taste of purees at his little 1/2 birthday "party" this weekend (we are having my friend with 3 little boys over for cake and there will be balloons so it counts as a party right?) but as far as letting him gnaw on "real" foods I haven't read enough about it yet to determine if he is ready. He is 6 mo and of course grabs everything in sight and shoves it into his mouth - but I don't know what he would do with an edible...I fished some tofu scramble out of his mouth a few weeks ago when the grabbypants snatched it off my plate and stuck it in his mouth and then just sat there with it sitting on his tongue while he GUSHED saliva all over the place. I mean, he might very well have swallowed it after a minute, but I totally wasn't prepared for it and he didn't look exactly happy that it was in his mouth so I just took it away.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 12:20 pm 
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Wrote Dissertation on Vegans, Meat, and the Deserted Island Question
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friends, I don't know how anyone does it. One 3.5yr old, 1 8month old who nurses alllll night and a fulltime job outside the home is starting to be more than I can handle. I mean, I feel guilty for being so overwhelmed because hey, I have help - H does pretty much 100% of the housework and shopping and a few days a week he'll attempt to let me sleep an extra hour by taking thrashy Sierra out to the livingroom to play. But he basically has his time off between the hours of 11pm and 8am and that is when I am awakened around 5x a night by at least one kid, sometimes both. Parents of multiple kids, I'm sure you know the deal - if it's not one kid waking up, it's the other!

Dahlia is a good sleeper but gets up to pee sometimes like 3 times a night, often when I have finally just gotten myself and Sierra to sleep. And I've considered nightweaning Sierra but that would probably end up being full weaning, since she nurses maybe once in the morning after we get up and once or twice when I get home at night. But all night long she wants to be attached to me, I can't even turn over or separate from her or she'll wake up rooting.

Throw in some advice from relatives like "She needs to learn to soothe herself, let her cry" and I'm just ready for a padded cell somewhere.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 12:27 pm 
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I'm so sorry and I so feel you! The only thing I can say bout the night weaning is that Grey wasn't nursing much during the day and once I night weaned him he started nursing more during the day. I know you are working so that may not even be possible.

I think I am going to try and wean Grey from nap times. I am so tired of having to lie next to him for 30+ minutes for him to nap and then to try and get up. Half the time it works, half the time he wakes up and I start all over. I also usually use nap time as the only meal I get to eat alone and I cannot tell you how many times I have had to abandon my food to go soothe him. Perhaps 4 days before leaving for a trip isn't the best time, but because I have had to travel so much I feel like I can't keep using the "after this trip" excuse to get things done.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 4:37 pm 
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Audrey, I'm so sorry for it being so tough. I also worry about how I'll handle two and I worry a lot about how I'll handle Malka going to daycare instead of being at home - all the extra driving, scheduling (we are so unscheduled at home and my job has crazy and irregular hours), prepping things to send with her, etc. I would probably make a pros/cons list about night-weaning, that sounds like the totally worst part of it and if you night weaned you might regain some sanity. The cons would obviously include it possibly being the end of your nursing relationship, so it depends how heavy that weighs for you.


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 Post subject: Re: Ventilation Station 2.0
PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 5:10 pm 
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Audrey, you're doing great. I'm a wreck many days, and I'm not working outside the home. The thought of going back to work right now is laughable. Is Dahlia co-sleeping with y'all too?


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